I've come to realize that while I have zero issue with having certain feminine interests, I often feel bad about myself when I exhibit what I consider to be feminine personality traits or reactions.

I don't know if it's entirely due to being socialized as a girl or what, but sometimes I will automatically and robotically act people-pleasing or uptight or moody, and I associate these things with being feminine.

For example, recently when I was out hanging with a group of guys and I was the only girl (or girl-appearing), I felt so depressed. These guys were joking around and having a carefree, stupid, drunk time, but I felt like I couldn't connect at all. I felt uptight, serious, and like they were all being immature and silly.

But that's not how I want to be. I want to be the lighthearted, go-with-the-flow, energetic, fun guy that I feel I SHOULD be.

Now I'm wondering if T could help me get there. Can it actually help change personality traits?

Not really. You do usually start to feel more confident and comfortable in your own skin though. Once that happens, the carefree and fitting in just happens.

It could make you a bit more active...

acting immature is not necessarily a matter of gender

well its possible boys are more prone to acting it out...

I'd say try to balance all sides of your personality...
accepting female sides...
accepting male sides...

its ok to not react irresponsible (lets be honest some boys are like that when drunk)
its also ok to be understanding... it doesn't have to get too deep or moody...

as LordKAT said over time you will feel more confident and comfortable...
just take the time you need...

hugs

What LordKat said. It hasn't changed my personality at all. My temperament has shifted a bit. I do feel more comfortable with myself and as a result I'm more confident, which has made it easier for me to have fun and be friendly. I was very standoffish in the past.

Thanks for the replies. Being more comfortable and confident does seem like it would lead to being more carefree.

However, how do you know T hasn't built up those traits chemically as well? I mean, there has to be a reason that guys are usually more energetic, rowdy, and adventurous than most women, and that most women are calmer, moodier, and more mature. Do you guys (who said T hasn't changed your personality) think that it's entirely due to social conditioning? (Guys are allowed and encouraged to be that way and girls aren't)?

Personally I think that does have to do with it but I also I believe it has to be due to hormonal differences. I've read about some trans women said they missed feeling like they could "take on the world" (the way they felt on T) but that they happily traded it for feeling calmer, more at peace, etc on E.

I also read that it's hard to be clinically depressed if your T levels are high enough (though this was referring to cis guys, presumably).

Keep in mind that I'm not saying that being energetic and rowdy and adventurous are inherently BETTER traits, they're just the traits that I personally would rather have. I hate it when I feel calm, mature, and serious, although I know plenty of women that have zero problem with it at all and even value those traits in themselves.

I don't always feel that way though, sometimes I genuinely feel like the funny, jokey, ambitious, carefree guy I would rather be, and I'm hoping that going on T will indeed help cement the masculine aspects of personality and fade the feminine ones.

I've always been pretty calm and mature when at work/school, but that doesn't mean I don't get rowdy or adventurous when the weekend comes!  The only different I notice since starting T is the energy level.  I'm now more energetic when I need to get things done. 

That's an awful lot of generalization. You can't really apply a blanket description to such a broad group of people. Not all men are as you describe.

Personality is considered a complex trait, meaning it is influenced by both your genes and your environment. Something externally introduced, whether hormones or anti-depressants, isn't going to change the personality. It might change how you feel, which may change how you feel like acting - but it isn't changing who you are.

Quote from: Bacon on July 13, 2015, 04:36:22 PM
I've come to realize that while I have zero issue with having certain feminine interests, I often feel bad about myself when I exhibit what I consider to be feminine personality traits or reactions.

I don't know if it's entirely due to being socialized as a girl or what, but sometimes I will automatically and robotically act people-pleasing or uptight or moody, and I associate these things with being feminine.

For example, recently when I was out hanging with a group of guys and I was the only girl (or girl-appearing), I felt so depressed. These guys were joking around and having a carefree, stupid, drunk time, but I felt like I couldn't connect at all. I felt uptight, serious, and like they were all being immature and silly.

But that's not how I want to be. I want to be the lighthearted, go-with-the-flow, energetic, fun guy that I feel I SHOULD be.

Now I'm wondering if T could help me get there. Can it actually help change personality traits?

In my opinion you should just do what ever the f u wanna do. I don't think there is a need to change who you are. I think certain personality traits will change naturally. It's might be by changing you social groups (it tends to happen when you transition), it might be from a shift in perspective,  or it could be from becoming more comfortable with your own skin/body. I have changed a lot since I started my transition without really trying.

Quote from: ftmax on July 15, 2015, 03:05:38 PM
That's an awful lot of generalization. You can't really apply a blanket description to such a broad group of people. Not all men are as you describe.

Personality is considered a complex trait, meaning it is influenced by both your genes and your environment. Something externally introduced, whether hormones or anti-depressants, isn't going to change the personality. It might change how you feel, which may change how you feel like acting - but it isn't changing who you are.

Quote from: amber roskamp on July 15, 2015, 03:06:12 PM
In my opinion you should just do what ever the f u wanna do. I don't think there is a need to change who you are. I think certain personality traits will change naturally. It's might be by changing you social groups (it tends to happen when you transition), it might be from a shift in perspective,  or it could be from becoming more comfortable with your own skin/body. I have changed a lot since I started my transition without really trying.

Agree!  Personally comparing my cisgender friends, the ladies are actually rowdier and dramatic while the gents are more calm and mature.  When we go party, I think myself and the guys feels like it's our responsibilities to take care of the ladies and make sure no one gets in trouble? 

Environment and situations will make you change the way you feel, thus you act differently.  Just be yourself and follow your feelings.  According to my psychiatrist, T will make your outside (appearance) match your inside (feelings) eventually, but does not change your personality.  However, voice dysphoria silence many FTMs socially, so most guys experience a boost of confident when the voice starting to drop.