OK -- "mahu" here . . . convenient term for someone "in the middle" from Hawaiian culture.
Men's restrooms freak me out. I feel perceptible threat in the men's room. The urinal wall is particularly problematic. Not comfortable fixing my hair, adjusting earrings . . . etc.
Women's restrooms make me uncomfortable, make cis-women uncomfortable.
Colleague who is an architect informs me that bathroom access/design is NOT an issue on the agenda for designers.
ADA requires "Disabled Accessible" -- & so I look for the "family" restroom, access with a lock on the door and intended for mix of genders from one family. I'm a disabled veteran and so access is not an issue, but moreover, ADA says that "If you think need to have access, you're entitled to access."
The "solution" to this issue is to set architectural standard, building codes such that there is provided a private access restroom facilities which is PRIVATE, PERSONAL, AND HAS A LOCK ON THE DOOR.
Some don't care about all this and can use public facilities w/o privacy. Those of use who need privacy are "reasonably accommodated" by the Americans w/ Disabilities Act (ADA) -- which protects gender ID.