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My name is Janine

Started by Janine, September 17, 2015, 11:52:42 AM

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Janine

I remember being little and wanting to be a girl. Late at night as I got older, I'd pretend I had breasts, using various things to stand in for them, wanting so bad to sleep in these pale imitations of womanhood but never daring. As I got older, I gradually resigned myself to being male, even enjoyed it at times, but I always had that one nagging thought in the back of my head, that little hateful voice saying "You pretender. You awkward little excuse for a guy. You fail at everything, even being you". So here I am. I'll prove my harshest critic, myself, wrong. Hello, internet, I'm Janine.
Am I male? Am I female? I'm just me.
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Jacqueline

Hello Janine,

I think I wrote nearly that same thing a while ago. Although I don't know that I ever really enjoyed the male part, just enjoyed being me. I especially feel like I wrote from "You pretender" on(except I'm not Janine).

Welcome. It is a caring and supportive community.

Good luck and I hope you find what you are looking for.

Joanna
1st Therapy: February 2015
First Endo visit & HRT StartJanuary 29, 2016
Jacqueline from Joanna July 18, 2017
Full Time June 1, 2018





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V M

Hi Janine  :icon_wave:

Welcome to Susan's  :)  Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Here's a few quick links to help you along

Please be sure to review

Things that you should read





Hugs

V M
The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS


- V M
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Sarah82

Hi Janine, welcome to Susan's.
I felt much the same as you did, I felt like I was wearing a mask that everyone else could see behind. Things have got a lot easier since casting it aside.

I hope you find friends and support here as well as having a good time.

Hugs,
Sarah





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katrinaw

Warm welcome to Susan's Janine

I can relate to your situation, and took it through marriage, kids and grandkids, but I must admit I struggled with the male bit all those years, really struggled.

Really tough turning that all over, but sooner or later you have too. I wish you well on your journey and look forward to seeing you around the forums

L Katy  :-*
Long term MTF in transition... HRT since ~ 2003...
Journey recommenced Sept 2015  :eusa_clap:... planning FT 2016  :eusa_pray:

Randomly changing 'Katy PIC's'

Live life, embrace life and love life xxx
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Rachel

Welcome to Susan's.

I too can relate to the struggle.
HRT  5-28-2013
FT   11-13-2015
FFS   9-16-2016 -Spiegel
GCS 11-15-2016 - McGinn
Hair Grafts 3-20-2017 - Cooley
Voice therapy start 3-2017 - Reene Blaker
Labiaplasty 5-15-2017 - McGinn
BA 7-12-2017 - McGinn
Hair grafts 9-25-2017 Dr.Cooley
Sataloff Cricothyroid subluxation and trachea shave12-11-2017
Dr. McGinn labiaplasty, hood repair, scar removal, graph repair and bottom of  vagina finished. urethra repositioned. 4-4-2018
Dr. Sataloff Glottoplasty 5-14-2018
Dr. McGinn vaginal in office procedure 10-22-2018
Dr. McGinn vaginal revision 2 4-3-2019 Bottom of vagina closed off, fat injected into the labia and urethra repositioned.
Dr. Thomas in 2020 FEMLAR
  • skype:Rachel?call
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Sandy74

Welcome to the Forum Janine!

I also get that nagging feeling as well that I am just pretending to be a guy when in fact my soul is telling me that I am really a woman that needs to come out and express her self and being here is the closest feeling I have at being myself as the woman that I should be. The people here are so supportive and you can learn so much from the people that are here, they know what they are talking about and its a great place to be.
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