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First time out

Started by Karlie Ann, October 14, 2015, 07:54:51 PM

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Karlie Ann

I apologize if this is the wrong spot for this, but tonight I went for a drive dressed in girl clothes and it was wonderful and I had to share it.  I finally was able to go out of the house dressed as the real me.  I'm a long way from being able to go to a public place, but this is progress!
Your current situation is not your final destination.
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Rainbow Bay

Congratulations lovely!

It's definitely a wonderful feeling, being able to be out and about as yourself. Hopefully there's lots more to come.  :)
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Asche

FWIW, it took me several years to get to the point of feeling halfway comfortable going out "dressed."  I started by walking into town at 4:00 a.m.  I graduated to going to a nearby supermarket right at opening time, when there weren't many people up and about, so I'd actually interact with people dressed.  And so on.  Each step made me very anxious, and it took a lot of times to get the anxiety down to reasonable levels.

It helped that nobody gave me a hard time about it.  I've had maybe 2 or 3 negative reactions in almost 10 years.  By now, I take the train in and out of NYC, ride the subway and the bus, go to chorus, all while I'm dressed.  It almost feels normal....

BTW, I don't pass at all.  My approach has been to "own" it, and work my way up to things slowly so I can at least fake confidence at any point.
"...  I think I'm great just the way I am, and so are you." -- Jazz Jennings



CPTSD
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Aazhie

Congrats!  :D  Small steps are always grand and much easier to handle for me!
You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don't try to forget the mistakes, but you don't dwell on it. You don't let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space.
Johnny Cash
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KristinaM

I have to change in the car sometimes b/c I'm not out at work, but I am everywhere else, so for doctor's appointments, lunch, therapy, etc...  I like putting my bra on in the car at stoplights and looking around me to see if anyone notices, lol.
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Sophieraven

I love going out in the car dressed, and i can do the shopping if i wear trousers(pants) Rather than a skirt. in fact last night whilst at Tesco, i saw some guys from where i used to work that commented on how good i looked weight wise etc and didn't even seem to notice that i was dressed any different to normal.
Sophie
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Kylie1

Awesome!  That feels wonderful doesn't it? Good for you! :)
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Mariah

Congrats Carlie Ann. Baby steps are a good thing. Hugs
Mariah
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AmandaDanielle

That is fabulous! Take your time.. it will come :) The first time i went out of the house dressed, I had a panic attack. The second time i went out it was going to my therapist appointment. I was so uneasy... even driving i thought other drivers knew what was up. My therapist didn't even recognize me until i smiled. I've learned that if i have confidence people believe what they see :)  I recently went to Seattle for a week as my true self! Super exciting to be myself. One of my trans friends told me, the bird is out of the cage and she liked it! She's totally right!!

Keep at it hun, it will get easier xoxoxo!
35 Years of living the wrong life, finally making it right  :)









"Don't expect everyone to understand your journey, especially if they haven't walked your path." -Unknown

"Those that matter don't mind... Those that mind don't matter"
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audreelyn

Congrats girl :)

It's a fantastic feeling! I get a great joy, a joy greater than anything else by something as simple as just being myself. I'm happy for you that you have the courage to do this too   ;D

Audree
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Ciara

Well done Girl 😉😉.
That is awesome. Isn't it such a wonderful feeling?
I'm so happy for you as I know this is a big step.
I don't have a gender issue.
I love being a girl.



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Sheila Grace

Quote from: Karlie Ann on October 14, 2015, 07:54:51 PM
I apologize if this is the wrong spot for this, but tonight I went for a drive dressed in girl clothes and it was wonderful and I had to share it.  I finally was able to go out of the house dressed as the real me.  I'm a long way from being able to go to a public place, but this is progress!

Karlie Ann- Bravo for you. Those are the steps that give each of us the courage that we need to be authentic. Yours act was heroic in more ways than you can know.Blessings, Sheila
I am an older MTF in transition. Currently negotiating this time of life with my SO of many years. I am PT and on HRT.



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Karlie Ann

Thank you all so much for the support.  But after Lemon's comment in the could I pass thread, I'm wondering of it's all for nothing.  Will I always be instantly read...that terrifies me more than anything.
Your current situation is not your final destination.
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Deborah


Quote from: Karlie Ann on October 23, 2015, 07:54:00 PM
Thank you all so much for the support.  But after Lemon's comment in the could I pass thread, I'm wondering of it's all for nothing.  Will I always be instantly read...that terrifies me more than anything.
You shouldn't worry about that too much.  If you do HRT later that will change a lot.  After 10 months on HRT I am starting to get occasionally called ma'am just out in jeans and a t shirt, no makeup or anything.  I also have noticed a great decline in the frequency of Sir.


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Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love that is contingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a healthy, unafraid human being....  - Dan Barker

U.S. Army Retired
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Sheila Grace

Quote from: Karlie Ann on October 23, 2015, 07:54:00 PM
Thank you all so much for the support.  But after Lemon's comment in the could I pass thread, I'm wondering of it's all for nothing.  Will I always be instantly read...that terrifies me more than anything.

Don't worry, Karlie Ann, it is a process and you WILL get there. Comments like that are rarely helpful or well placed; you are right where you need to be and doing the right thing. Keep it up!!!! Blessings, Sheila
I am an older MTF in transition. Currently negotiating this time of life with my SO of many years. I am PT and on HRT.



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