So, I've been telling people close to me that transitioning/ hormones won't change me, as in my interests and general personality. I'm aware of mood swings associated with T, but the way i understand it these settle down with time/ can be managed by counting to ten?

Am I right to assure people that your internal self really stays the same (only one might be less unhappy?)

I just want to know for sure (or in general would be enough) because I don't want to lie to anyone by mistake.

P.S. I'm sorry if this has been covered already, I've been reading this forum for a while and I searched and haven't found an answer

I don't think anyone can say anything about going on T for certain.

I can share my experience though.

I have been on T almost 23 months. I wanted to make sure that who I was at my core didn't change. I can honestly say that who I am as a person has mostly been unchanged. I have the same interests, same laid back personality, same desire to be a good person. I would say I am pretty much the same.

With that being said, everything is not exactly the same. I am more confident and happier than I was before. Because of that, I probably am more assertive in situations that I may not have been in the past. I haven't really experienced mood swings, even in the beginning. The only time I didn't feel myself was right after my hysterectomy when my levels were a bit too high on my old dose. But that was quickly fixed by cutting my dose by about 40%. Emotions did come to me differently. I've tried to explain this a few times and I never feel like I get it quite accurate. But it was like having to relearn how my emotions came to me. I still felt them as intensely, they just felt different. I had to figure them out again and also figure out new outlets since I lost the ability to cry. I always hated how easily I cried before so I am happy it changed but I did need to find other ways to let emotional stress go.

So "will I change?" Is kind of a complicated answer. I would say - no, you won't change personality wise if you don't want to. But you might be a different version of yourself, if that makes sense.

Yeah i expected it to be complicated Thanks for the info tho

I wouldn't mind crying less haha

No problem. I think most guys will say it didn't change them as a person. You are still the same person who has lived your life up until now with the same experiences and genetics.

And yes, not having a hair trigger cry reaction to every strong emotion has been awesome. Even though I wanted that to change, it was still weird at first because you get used to how your body reacts to things. Almost 2 years in, though, I don't give it a second thought and am so much happier that I am not crying all the time. It was always embarrassing to me because I had no control over it.

Quote from: Dex on October 20, 2015, 10:27:50 AM
No problem. I think most guys will say it didn't change them as a person. You are still the same person who has lived your life up until now with the same experiences and genetics.

And yes, not having a hair trigger cry reaction to every strong emotion has been awesome. Even though I wanted that to change, it was still weird at first because you get used to how your body reacts to things. Almost 2 years in, though, I don't give it a second thought and am so much happier that I am not crying all the time. It was always embarrassing to me because I had no control over it.

Took the words right outta my mouth with the crying thing. I always tried to tell myself there was no shame in crying, but I still felt embarassed about how much I cried. And I felt like I couldn't stop myself when I got started. I hated it so much and I'm so glad this is an effect of T.

I think people are really hesitant to say yes or no to anything about T because Your Milage May Vary so much. By and large your personality likely won't, though. My personality changed to a degree, but what I mean by that is that I became more confident and less anxious. That doesn't mean that T magically made me that way, though. I just became more comfortable with myself. Technically speaking I suppose that's a personality change,  but you're not going to change into a stranger. I was worried about that too at first.

I cry a ridiculous amount, particularly around that time of the month... I'd love to be able to see Les Mis without embarrassing myself in a theater.

I'm glad to hear this stuff, it's mostly what I expected and what I told people - that I might be less unhappy but I'd still be the same person - but it's good to hear that I'm not making it up when i say that.

Interests and personalities change over time regardless. It's impossible to 100% separate between purely chemical effects, changes from being more comfortable and happier/dysphoria reduction, and changes that just took course over the place of time, all that stuff is interconnected. Bottom line is, HRT will not morph you into a different person all by itself, and the amounts of T you'll be taking are nowhere near the steroid abuse levels needed for "roid rage".

Something to bear in mind that I don't see mentioned often enough. As people's perception of you changes, the exact same behaviors will be perceived differently. Personal experience example: I'm much calmer than pre-T and pre-top surgery (not being constantly miserable does wonders). No one at work knows my medical history ("stealth") so that doesn't factor in. The difference in response between one of my female coworkers taking a deep breath to maintain composure, and me taking a deep breath to maintain composure is marked. The former is often ignored completely, whereas the latter is often met with a concerned statement such as, "It's ok dude, calm down".