Lately I've been a bit depressed. Mainly because I found out I am transgender a few days ago. But, I'm 16 and I will never be able to be the type of person that I want to be unless some miracle in medical science happens!

If anyone has ever watched the Rooster Teeth show called RWBY, then youve seen the character called Yang. She's the one who wears the Yellow, brown, and black clothes and has the shotgun gauntlets. She's the type of person I want to be in mental and physical form. But, Just to have that type of body in my position I would've had to have started my transition at a very young age. It doesn't even matter that my skeletal structure is somewhat in the middle of a guy and a girl. I have significantly wider hips (I shoot riflery and I can shoot in the female stance because of my hips), my arms have that outward angle that girls have, and my shoulders haven't widened as much as they should have.

I just don't know what to do other than work on my mental state. But if anyone has any help to offer it would be gladly appreciated. And honestly I don't know if I want to go through with a transition. I just think that I wouldn't end up happy with the result and if I wouldn't then I'll just wait for full dive VR systems to come out and I'll play a game where I can play as a female character.

Here are some resources that could help you:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,194986.msg1737439.html#msg1737439

My, you're 16... still more than enough time...
and science makes all kinds of progress...

it cannot exactly be said how people react because its individual.
But you might look up a few transition timelines, there are people with good results...

The next step would be to look for a gender therapist and maybe try out a few easy reversible steps... like changes to hair and clothing style... second hand stores could be a good source...


have a few *hugs*

The biggest excuse I told myself about avoiding transition, was that I didn't think I could get to some magical point of attractiveness. The truth is that you never really know, and that most people are more attracted to your personality than outward physical traits anyway. Don't sell yourself short just because a particular ideal is out of reach. Stop comparing who you are and who you could be to fictional characters, celebrities and models. You are beautiful and interesting because you aren't a copy of someone or something else.
Yes, I get that physical characteristics are rather important, especially at the stage of life you're in now. The worst negative thoughts like, "I wouldn't want to be an ugly [chosen gender]," are steeped in cultural biases and internalized oppression. Whereas worrying about being a good person is better and more productive than trying to shoehorn yourself into a particular beauty ideal or category. Plastic surgery is capable of some miraculous things, but it can't fix you on the inside.


     Hugs,
- Katie
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I thank you for the advice you've given. But it still goes back to my original problem. Tech just isn't advanced enough to do what I want. And even if it is at a point where it is advanced enough then it most likely would be extremely painful (rearranging or cutting and modifying bones) and way too expensive for me.

Let alone I still need to work up the courage to tell my parents! I actually have to do my research late at night on my phone so I can stay discreet until I'm sure what path I want to take, the coming out right now, or the coming out later when better tech comes along.

I just don't know what to do, and since I don't have my drivers license and I live in Alaska I don't have very many options. I just wish I could go back in time so that I could make my 5 year old self express what he was feeling. I had the feelings of wanting to be a girl since I was that young or maybe even younger, but since my extended family is very right wing Christian I didn't show it. I didn't even connect the feelings to what I am until about a week ago since I just started realizing it.

I just don't know what to do. But I'm taking your advice and doing more research.

I think the usual advice at this point is to find a therapist. It certainly helped me a lot.

As to technology, its quite amazing what you can do these days and its only getting better. If you want perfection then like so many things in life its not possible, yet. Rather than dwell on it try to accept it and move on, because, what else can you do?

If you're that way inclined (and I am) start making plans for your future to get what you want. At 16 there's a lot of future in front of you and the sooner you start the sooner you're going to get it. I find its also a great way of distracting myself from my problems.

Hi Honey and Welcome to Susan's

Most of us oldies would pay to be 16 and transition! Yes it is hard and yes we can never be cisfemale, but by the goddess young people do have wonderful opportunities nowadays.

Alaska does have therapists, and good ones.

The most important thing is to never say never. I was 5 when I knew I was female, I was 58 when I transitioned - there was nothing to help me when I was young.

The world has changed and opportunities exist - so be strong and be you!

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Sorry but the best way to be is


YOURSELF

not someone else

Have a nice day

Janet

I think everyone is taking what I said about the character in a different way than what I meant. Just to clarify what I meant to do is use that character as an example, not as what I want to be in every single way. But I appreciate all of the help. It's helped me deal with the small bit of depression that I've been having to know that there are people so willing to help someone they've never met. Especially when I know that a lot of my family would not accept me since my father and step-mother were criticized very harshly for getting married, and my great aunt is a lesbian and she was pretty much thrown out until maybe 10 years ago. It's just a hard thing to know that the people closest to you can be like that. And I don't know how my parents will react since when I've tried to tell them trivial things before they haven't reacted especially well.

Sorry Hon,

I will not trivialise anything.

My Mum and Dad loved me. But I was a girl and not the son they wished. In the 1960's there was nothing. I had no resource. Neither did they. I was sent to all boy schools to 'toughen' up, I was a girl.

No matter what happened to me, I was a girl. I couldn't change it, and neither could they. And none of us understood.

In the end at the ripe old age of 17 I gave up and left home; I had to live. Yes it was hard and looking back I have no idea how I survived. I put myself through University. I worked like a demon to give myself a life.

Sometimes I did things people should never do. I slept in gutters, I slept in worse places. Somehow I survived.

Why?

Because I am me - nothing would stop me from being me. There was no alternative. Or at least when the alternative looked attractive I somehow managed to fight it.

What advice would I give to me at 16?

Don't do what I did.

But plan, know what you want and work towards it. You need money: education is money (not guaranteed but ...)

Decide what and who you will be. Be brave, be strong and keep remembering there is only one person who can ever help you.

You.

No one else.

I lost my family, I'm sad about that, but I am me. I'm glad about that.

Cindy

You be the judge. I couldn't start HRT until I was about 26 and my surgery was at age 30. The only facial surgery was a nose job that cleaned up some visible flaws. My current avatar was taken around 4 years after surgery. If I had only been able to start my transition at age 16. I am not crying over spilled milk because my life after surgery has turned out great but you work with what you have and you still have a really great starting point.