Hey everyone!

        First, my breast have suddenly started itching like no other! Ahhhh. What can you do to help it? I'm pretty sure I read somewhere that this is normal. Yesterday was my one month hrt mark!

Also, my guy friend that served with me in the military spontaneously bought me plane and shuttle tickets to spend a week with him. I leave for Colorado on Thursday from Atlanta. I haven't socially transitioned yet, but since I don't have to worry about running into people I haven't told. I'm wanting to go a little more feminine, but I don't know if that could be problematic at an airport. Is Colorado trans friendly? He says it is and his roommates will be fine with me.

Also, will I recieve any issues due to my medications? I have syringes and needles that I'm worried about.

Thanks, I know this is a spontaneous post with a lot going on!

-Kara [emoji136]




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Breast itching is normal. Mine on HRT go from slight pain, to little "zappy" electric feeling to itching and combinations thereof. Consider it a wonderful sign that your body is growing into its female self.

I would not worry too much about traveling as your slightly feminized self, prior to this last year, i did that all the time. (women's underwear, women's jeans, man's jacket etc.). About the worst thing that ever happened to me is getting a pat down for my bra snaps. Make sure you have copies of all prescriptions and that everything is in it's proper container.

Enjoy your trip!

Hey there!

Thanks for your response. I'm experiencing all of that right now. It's so hard to not scratch though.

I really want to just finally express myself how I want to. Girl jeans, boots, maybe a top. Put on a little make up. I got my nails done but I'm so afraid of how people are judging me. I'm going to look like a pill factory Hahaha.
I feel like it's just a blessing that he did this so spontaneously. He knows I've been having a rough patch of doubting myself and letting fears getting in the way. I would have never asked him to fly me out there and pay for my shuttles. I don't know how I'll be able to repay him. But, I feel like this will soothe myself and allow me valuable insight on becoming me.

Thanks once again.
              Kara Aryana Israel


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if it's dry, i usually moisturize my nipples and boobs to relieve some itching. i dont have itching if i dont wear any undergarments, but idk what causes the itching to start when i do wear a tank top. i guess it's the chaffing and rubbing.

Christy,

Thanks for responding. I'll try moisturizing to see if it helps.
I'm wondering if it's because of all of the changes that are going on with them recently.

-Kara


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Quote from: Kara.A.I on November 16, 2015, 03:09:08 PM
I have syringes and needles that I'm worried about.

From the TSA website:

QuoteUnlimited number of unused syringes when accompanied by insulin or other injectable medication.

Though you might want to check them in if you don't want the hassle.

Quote from: KarinMcD on November 17, 2015, 10:00:39 AM
From the TSA website:
Though you might want to check them in if you don't want the hassle.

Don't check them. Declare them. You don't want some luggage handler losing your medication along with your luggage.

Quote from: Kara.A.I on November 16, 2015, 08:02:55 PM
Christy,

Thanks for responding. I'll try moisturizing to see if it helps.
I'm wondering if it's because of all of the changes that are going on with them recently.

-Kara


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I think there is two kinds of itching, the type caused by dryness and chaffing and the other which is caused my changes in the breasts. Perhaps it is the skin stretching? But it feels internal doesn't it? I wonder if it is just the nerves accommodating expanded tissue.

Scratch airport.

So thankful for every day that I get to wake up and feel like I'm obviously not a human being and obviously I don't deserve empathy and to be treated the right way. Rip that band-aid off and show me how I'll never be normal enough.

I think I'm having my first emotional spiral. Of course it is due to someone else.


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That sounds bad. Trip canceled or problem at airport?

He cancelled it because he's "too nervous". I'm trying to be empathetic. But, it's really hit my core. It confirmed all the feelings I've been having. I'm not normal. I also can't be viewed and treated as such. I'm trying to stay above water but Idk.


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Quote from: Kara.A.I on November 17, 2015, 01:28:03 PM
He cancelled it because he's "too nervous". I'm trying to be empathetic. But, it's really hit my core. It confirmed all the feelings I've been having. I'm not normal. I also can't be viewed and treated as such. I'm trying to stay above water but Idk.


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Kara-

You are completely normal; what you are experiencing is other people being uninformed because of <reasons> and making decisions based on ignorance.

Are you seeing a therapist? If not, a therapist can help you work through these feelings and can help you understand that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You simply have a medical condition, a birth defect that is not widely understood. You've done nothing wrong dear; please don't put this on yourself.

Eva,

I'm trying to believe that. I just hate feeling like a second class human or woman.

I have a therapist and I messaged him. I see him every two weeks. I think I'll go to the hospital before I do anything I can't take back. It's a darkness that's pushing on my soul that I'm not used to feeling. I feel so alone and it's like transitioning is making it worse. This is the first time I've truly second guessed my transition.

I'm seriously debating going ahead and coming out to everyone today so I can rip the band-aid off and find out who my real supporters are.

Thanks
.        Kara.


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Quote from: Kara.A.I on November 17, 2015, 02:21:32 PM
Eva,

I'm trying to believe that. I just hate feeling like a second class human or woman.

I have a therapist and I messaged him. I see him every two weeks. I think I'll go to the hospital before I do anything I can't take back. It's a darkness that's pushing on my soul that I'm not used to feeling. I feel so alone and it's like transitioning is making it worse. This is the first time I've truly second guessed my transition.

I'm seriously debating going ahead and coming out to everyone today so I can rip the band-aid off and find out who my real supporters are.

Thanks
.        Kara.


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Kara-

Please do what you need to do to be safe. Maybe delay the coming out announcement until your emotions have slowed down a bit. You probably don't really want to blast the news out to everyone without preparing for the possible outcomes.

And questioning your decision in this circumstance is completely normal - I did it many times and I think we've all done it. That just means that you understand the seriousness of your situation.

Eva,

Thanks again for your reply. I took my t-blockers and my emotions are seeing to calm down a little. I had to miss the doses yesterday due to pharmacy issues. I really feel like coming out so I can minimize future events like this.

I'm glad to hear it's normal. I just hope he comes around and talks through this. We're close as friends and I don't want that to be messed up.

-Kara


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Sorry that happened to you. Therapy is awesome - keep going. Do nothing hastily and know that we all experience these things. I know that does not help a lot when you are in the depths of it. Glad your T-blockers helped.

Thank you for your support. I love therapy. It's really been helping. I guess the rejection was just shocking and hurtful because he's been so supportive of me. I'm just trying to focus on something else so I don't go mad.


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Well, I've talked with a few people who know and I might be coming out publicly to everyone and changing my name/gender/profile pic! I'm scared but it feels so right. Then I don't have to hide.


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Hello Kara,

     I have read your entire thread. I totally agree with everyone who has given you advice. First and foremost, BE SAFE, if you feel that you can't or are having trouble doing so please please please seek out the help you need. I am truly sorry for your disappointment but that is on him, not you. You are a very beautiful and adorable woman so believe in yourself. As my mother told me when I came out, and continually tells me, To Thine Own Self Be True. My own transition also began recently and I fearfully detailed it in the introductions section last night. It may give you some inspiration I hope. Be PROUD of who you are. Be confident at all times and always act as if nothing is different. Show no fear, human nature has programed us to pickup on fear and suspect something is out of the ordinary. If you portray that all is normal then that is what others pick up. Always be yourself, it is only then you can find that inner peace you need. Talk with your Therapist, unload on them if you need to. That is what they are there for to assist and guide you on your journey. Finally, ask your therapist to provide you with a "carry letter". It is a vital instrument for you to have and just may help in any "uncomfortable" or "questionable" circumstances. Such as airport security. Hope this helps you some as you travel along your journey to your true self.         Joanie Evelyn.

I had a bad Monday questioning my everything due to someone else... so I can relate.  Hang in there girl, and you'll be fine!