I've resolved myself to finally address my gender issues with HRT, but I've got concerns with my body as is normal. I just want the brutally honest opinions of anyone. I know that HRT affects everyone's bodies differently, but I want realistic expectations. Here's some pictures of me right now. I'm 22 German, Japanese

http://imgur.com/a/n8enx

I didn't think I was overly heavy or fat and that's the bad part. I kinda feel like my skeleton frame is just too big so maybe there isn't a huge amount of mass I can lose meaning I'm a bit stuck looking like a block. I'm 165 pounds 5'9". Regardless I look built like a truck. I do think the camera makes me look a little wider than in real life, but that might just be my broken eyes. My shoulders are pretty wide. I have to get rid of that facial hair too(Laser Removal?)

I just measured my waist (30") and underbust (31.5"). Which I think are not bad since I can realistically lose like 5 inches at best off my waist if I just corset train and lose some fat. My ribs really stick out. Even my friends have commented on that before.

I'm just so disgusted about my looks. I really want to lose as much bulk as possible, but my genes retain muscle forever despite my neglect and cardio... I haven't even worked out in 3 years and I can still bench probably around 200...

Once I get my anti-androgens or estrogen regimen underway I'm going to start serious cardio (2-3 hours/day) and eat a low protein diet rich with healthy carbs, vegetables and fats. I tried this before to slim down, but it just gave me acne, probably because of extended periods of spiked androgens and sweat.

What about my face? I really want to get FFS for my nose bridge, forehead contouring, brow, trachea, chin and jawline. I think I need something eventually for my receded hair, but a good hairstyle should hide things in the meantime while I address other more important items.

Hip augmentation might also help along with exercises. Maybe corset training could help me achieve more of a shape?

I think my body might just be <Not Permitted> for HRT even if I can lose bulk. Am I being pessimistic, but I can't really see a whole lot of potential?

Even though I feel that way I'm gonna do HRT anyways because I feel like ->-bleeped-<- everyday and my soul is <Not Permitted> dead. I intend to go all in because that's the only way I do things...

It's not that I haven't had success in my life. It's that even success and "fun" feels empty and meaningless when I'm not who I want to be.

I saved up enough money to pay for 12-15 months of rent, food, gas, laser hair removal, and drugs. Though I'll have to work in order to pay for surgery.

If I end up just looking like a man with "boyface" and a chest so be it. At least it's better than making myself want to vomit and punch-out every mirror.

Here is my hero


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I'm in the same boat as you where I'm about to start HRT and desperately want to be one of those beautiful women you see here, and have the same concerns that I wont.  All I can say is just hope for the best, and make what you can of it   I'm sure you'll look great

btw, Pinterest has become a godsend for me lol

My view is there is a good deal of potential in that body. First you have a face somewhere between round and heart shaped which is far better than the long face that some of us have to deal with. The jaw is weaker than mine making it more feminine. Yes the beard will have to go but your dark hair means laser should work better on it and the amount of electrolysis you need will be less. Makeup and hair will add to the look and a big smile will be import. HRT tends to make small changes to the face but they do make a difference. As for the body, many women (including me) have a somewhat boyish athletic figure. The hormones may add to what you have with breast and possibly hips. How much it will add will be determined by your genetics. You will lose muscle mass as well. All women have clothing issue and you will be no different. You will be able to wear some styles and others you should stay way form. My restriction include lose tops with sleeves because I need to hide my broad shoulders and sleeveless just doesn't work.

The biggest thing for anybody to pass is attitude. if you have the attitude that you are a woman and happy with yourself, people will not question your flaws and will accept you as a woman. There will be much work making making the new you but if you work hard enough, I think you can have the life you want.

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Quote from: Brooke33 on November 18, 2015, 10:25:25 PM
I'm in the same boat as you where I'm about to start HRT and desperately want to be one of those beautiful women you see here, and have the same concerns that I wont.  All I can say is just hope for the best, and make what you can of it   I'm sure you'll look great

btw, Pinterest has become a godsend for me lol

Your right! Pinterest all the way

Everyone responds differently along different times. Look into diet changes that promote healthy estrogen metabolism, a knowledgeable physician/mentor, and overall patience – start HRT like you've desired to do and see how things go/feel.

Presentation extends beyond hormones, to grooming, clothes, etc. Bone structure becomes irrelevant to a point with how creative cuts of clothes get. Laser > electrolysis, yes. Don't get caught up in the numbers of measurement or weighing in. It's an endless abyss of disappointment. Eyeball in the mirror honestly. Maintain good protein per your weight, stay around ~1600/less calories per day, keeping nutrients/vitamins/supplements/hydration up. Muscle size/shape will stay to an extent until atrophy, mass will come/go. See body builders looking deflated, but still somewhat built.

Surgeries involve costs and may not be needed with what may change, again best to reevaluate a year+ down the road. Hormones have a lot of mood/emotion properties as well, so you may find that the first thing to change is your mind clearing up.

Good luck!