As most of you guys know, I hate living with my pops. I hate it now, to the point where I am on the hunt (once again) for affordable places to live at. Problem is he is my payee representative presiding over my SSI, which means he has total control over my disability benefits; not me. That's a huge issue and way uncool. But I have a way cool therapist who wants to hep me rid my pops as my payee and help prove to the courts that I am now mentally stable enough to manage my own money and care for myself as a young adult should.

Other issues include finding a place, waiting for a very long time on a list, going to the housing office for any additional paperwork, having to go with my dad who will gladly misgender me from the start, tell everyone there I am female and that my real name is my assigned name at birth and not Phoenix. >.>

So, any of you guys struggling hard right now to find a place to stay, move out of a bossy parent's home or maybe you did find a place and can offer me some good advice on this?

Thanks. =)

I wasn't in the same situation you are but I did recently move. Even if my work wasn't so far away from where I was living I would have still left. It was a small city, very small and people there had likely never seen another trans person before. They did not understand not only trans people but anyone of the LGBT community. So I packed up and left. It's only an hour away so I can still see my family but I no longer have to live there.

You know your situation better than I do so I may be wrong on this but I think your first step will have to be proving you are well enough to take care of yourself so the courts will remove your father as your guardian. As it stands now you can try to move away and if he doesn't want you to all he has to do is refuse to give you the funds to do so. He's got all the control right now. I'm sorry that your father is not helpful. Mine wasn't either. When I told him years ago he told me everyone was going to laugh at me and that I deserved it. I'm not sure if he had changed his stance before he died as we never got to have that conversation but I know what he said hurt. I wish you well.

You could have a look here:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,197754.msg1758880.html#msg1758880

Well you might talk with your counselor which way would be best.

Another way might be to look for someone looking for a roommate.

keep on keeping on...
listen to your intuition...
and keep on looking for ways to fulfill your dreams 

have a big *hug*

Just wanted to say well done and I'm glad you may finally have a chance to get away from him

Thanks for the replies everyone.

  Yaaaay!  I'm so happy to hear that you're getting out of there!

Do you really have to take him with you looking for places?  That sounds miserable.

If there's a college in your town, you might be able to share a large house with people your age.  Hit up craigslist and post a housing wanted message.  Looking for a shared house, you might post two ads -- one in which you disclose that you're transgender.  If people respond to your trans-disclosing ad and say something supportive, you've probably struck gold.

I've had success finding good housing options in a few different environments.

My advice would be first to utilize your network. I'm not sure if there are specific channels you'd need to go through to maximize whatever housing benefits are available to you, or if they just give you a set amount of money to be used for housing expenses. But if you can't afford to live alone in a studio or 1 bedroom, it's always nicer to live with someone you know as opposed to strangers. Make a post on Facebook and see if anyone else is looking. Encourage them to share your post with their friends. Even friends of friends are better than strangers.

If you do end up looking for roommates, be as open and honest about who you are and what you're looking for as you're comfortable being. When my roommate and I were looking to rent out our third bedroom, we were up front about the fact that I'm trans, that we have a rambunctious dog, that we're gun owners, and that we don't tolerate any kind of substance use. Sure, it cut down on the number of people who were open to renting with us, but it saved us a lot of trouble in screening out people who wouldn't have ever been a good fit for our lifestyle.

As far as finding a place, look at the Trans Housing Network on Tumblr. People can post looking for space or if they have space available. If I was looking, that would be the first place I'd make a post on.

Apartment complexes will often post ads on Facebook when they're having move-in specials. I got 3 months free rent at my first apartment because I saw the ad on Craigslist while I was scrolling. It saved me $2100. Don't move into a place just because they have a good special, but definitely look and see what options are available. If you like the place AND it'll save you money, great.

Probably the best housing deal I ever got was while I was in school. My university had year-round resident advisors because they hosted a lot of summer conferences, so I was able to get hired the summer after my freshman year and I never had to pay for housing or move back home for the next three years. I don't know if you're open to going to school, but that is a pretty good way to get decent housing.

Quote from: FTMax on November 27, 2015, 03:45:32 PM
I've had success finding good housing options in a few different environments.

My advice would be first to utilize your network. I'm not sure if there are specific channels you'd need to go through to maximize whatever housing benefits are available to you, or if they just give you a set amount of money to be used for housing expenses. But if you can't afford to live alone in a studio or 1 bedroom, it's always nicer to live with someone you know as opposed to strangers. Make a post on Facebook and see if anyone else is looking. Encourage them to share your post with their friends. Even friends of friends are better than strangers.

If you do end up looking for roommates, be as open and honest about who you are and what you're looking for as you're comfortable being. When my roommate and I were looking to rent out our third bedroom, we were up front about the fact that I'm trans, that we have a rambunctious dog, that we're gun owners, and that we don't tolerate any kind of substance use. Sure, it cut down on the number of people who were open to renting with us, but it saved us a lot of trouble in screening out people who wouldn't have ever been a good fit for our lifestyle.

As far as finding a place, look at the Trans Housing Network on Tumblr. People can post looking for space or if they have space available. If I was looking, that would be the first place I'd make a post on.

Apartment complexes will often post ads on Facebook when they're having move-in specials. I got 3 months free rent at my first apartment because I saw the ad on Craigslist while I was scrolling. It saved me $2100. Don't move into a place just because they have a good special, but definitely look and see what options are available. If you like the place AND it'll save you money, great.

Probably the best housing deal I ever got was while I was in school. My university had year-round resident advisors because they hosted a lot of summer conferences, so I was able to get hired the summer after my freshman year and I never had to pay for housing or move back home for the next three years. I don't know if you're open to going to school, but that is a pretty good way to get decent housing.

Hey Max.

I went ahead and did post a detailed request on The Trans Network, for a place about a few hours ago. But this will probably be a last resort. I just don't wanna wait too long, try my father's patience and end up homeless. I don't know anyone personally who would allow me shelter. Other than where I am at now and using a Section 8 voucher somewhere, The Trans Network would be my last/only hope.