Hey y'all! First off, I just want to say what a great website! Thanks for having me. After reading some posts, there's some great stuff in here I can learn from. I'm just going to start with why I joined first though. I will try and keep this as brief as possible. Basically I'm still fairly new to crossdressing. I've had an interest in women's clothing since childhood though.. about 10 years ago I started acting them out about 10 years ago. It has been for just quick sexual purposes though. (like putting on nail polish on my toes and wearing stockings) I've tried bras and such in the past but I wasn't feeling it at the time. But about a month ago I thought I'd dress up again, and I dunno, something just clicked. A VERY powerful feeling. A feeling of beauty is the best way I'd describe it. Now I shave my legs/chest, paint my fingers, and stuff bras. I enjoy it so much now I can't go back.

This feeling is so powerful that I'm probably going to reveal my true self to family/friends. I'm not worried on reactions or how they feel about it so much. The feeling when I'm dressed is all I need. What worries me is their understanding of why I wear women's clothing. Now, I'm not at all against men being attracted to to other men. That's fine with me. But it's just not me. I've even had sexual relations with another man twice to make sure. First time I thought I was, but I think it was just thrill of a new sexual adventure. Second to make sure.. lol  Anways, I've revealed my dressing to 3 women. The other 2 not the extend of where I am today, but still. But their first question is always the same, "are you gay?" I tell them no but I really get a sense that they don't believe me. Even my girlfriend I believe has doubts... lol

I want to reveal my true self for my true self, and not have this false cloud around me. I don't want my friends when I'm dressed wondering if I'm checking them out or even feeling any sense that's the reason I dress.. Is there any advice for this? Or is it simply being 'labeled' in this society? Thanks for reading hope to hear some comments...

Hi, welcome to the site. I think you'll find that most people are operating off stereotypes and various other labels..."men who dress as women clearly must be gay"...how you counteract that is another thing altogether. There are plenty of people who identify as hetro CDs though, hopefully some can give you pointers.

Ya.. that seems to be biggest hurdle.. Not really fear. I know my family members have seen me with painted toes. my gf just covered for me and said she made me cuz she needs practice. but after 4 years that cover story seems blown. I know one of my guy friends has seen them to when he woke me up. we never really talked about it.. lol but I have other guy friends who may not be so keen. I know the ladies love it.. I once walked to 7-11 with stockings, painted toes, and heels and had the girls flocking around. Some said my pedicure was better than theirs.. I love my feet.. lol

Something like this in your life is how you determine your real friends. You real friends may be uncomfortable with the idea at first but will stay with you long enough to learn what you are about. You may a have people who accept you at the start and you may lose a few people along the way.

Remember that you aren't doing this for other people. You are doing it so you can be comfortable with yourself. Just be truthful to everybody and your true friends will accept you for who you are.

Also you need to understand that there seems to be brain differences resulting in a feminized brain that causes these feelings. It's not something that can be fixed and the best way to ease the uncomfortable feeling is to alter you life to fill the need. I am a post surgical transsexual and I needed all of it. Not everybody does and often people find a way to live that resolves the need.

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Hi Bentley, I am a CD and married with 2 boys 21 & 19. The 19 year old lives at home and I came out to him earlier this year. He is very good and I am comfortable with wearing dresses, stockings, shoes and having painted nails around him but am yet to apply and wear makeup or my bra and breast forms at home probably due to my anxieties and fear of acceptance from my wife. I am in a position in life where I cannot come out to my friends and local community or at work. I think you are in a very lucky position where you can get this out in the open now and be accepted for who you are. Those friends that choose to walk away were probably not true friends. When I came out to my wife in full her immediate reaction was to ask if I was gay or Bi and it took a couple of lengthy conversations plus a bit of time for her to understand that I am not interested in men. We will always have to answer that question as people will always be curious.
As your life moves forward it would be great if you can live it to the fullest and to your true self. I like others regret not being able to have the opportunity or courage to have done the same.
I look forward to hearing how you get on and I wish you the best in being you. 

Hetero CD here too.  It can be tough revealing yourself to friends and family but truly the ones that love you will accept you.  There were whispers and side conversations and indeed an aunt I used to adore told everyone I was gay or that I'd turn out that way (so what if I was and did?).

My wife knows, my mom knows, heck lots of friends and family know (not all).  I choose who to tell and when, not everyone needs to know.  I have amazing support at home; when I doubt myself my wife is there to lend me some strength. 

I guess my point is you don't have to be out unless you want and need to.  Its totally up to you how and who you reveal yourself to. Now when you do yes that obvious and outdated question about your sexuality will come up.  Confidence is key... when you tell someone about your dressing be confident, don't stumble around it.  I'd even be outfront and say, "I don't like guys, I know that's what you are thinking, I just like to feel feminine and express it through clothing". You take it on head on and the resistance evaporates.

I told one of my best friends when explaining why I was getting divorced.  It was honestly easier to be honest than it was to keep telling lies.  His reaction?  "what a B1%h" (he was biased and didn't like her anyways).  Sounds like you are pretty new to all of this.  Baby steps, but in the end be true to who you are (after you sort that out of course).

WOW! Amazing responses from all.. And so quickly too! Thank you's! But I am still really new to all this that's pretty clear... But I just had my girlfriends sister here, and I still had polish on my fingers. I was expecting a comment or remark at least, but she didn't say anything. So finally I asked her, and she said she'd known for some time. My gf didn't tell her, but I've left clues laying around. (clothes she knows her sister wouldn't wear, fresh smell of nail polish etc) I do have a feeling a few others do too! I'm thinking I am thinking I will take baby steps. Starting with fake nails. I am a nail bitter lol then I stop wearing long pants and show my smooth legs off.. Then we'll see where it goes from there. And those can think what they want but my favorite color is pink and there's gonna be a lot more of it!

Thanks again and I actually don't really know anything about fake nails, applying/removing soooo and other advice would be greatly appreciated too...  I know, I'm kinda needy (sorry!)

Not sure if I fit in this site.  Started with women's shoes, progressed to tights and tops.  Tried a dress and it did nothing for me.  Mostly like how the shoes (flats & heels) and some selective tops feel and look.  No real interest in makeup, polish, etc. 

Quote from: freakynerd on December 12, 2015, 09:17:36 AM
Not sure if I fit in this site.  Started with women's shoes, progressed to tights and tops.  Tried a dress and it did nothing for me.  Mostly like how the shoes (flats & heels) and some selective tops feel and look.  No real interest in makeup, polish, etc.

Big hug! Anyone who wants to be a nice person fits in on this site!     Glad you joined us!

Hugs, Devlyn

Quote from: freakynerd on December 12, 2015, 09:17:36 AM
Not sure if I fit in this site.  Started with women's shoes, progressed to tights and tops.  Tried a dress and it did nothing for me.  Mostly like how the shoes (flats & heels) and some selective tops feel and look.  No real interest in makeup, polish, etc.

Of course you fit it! Dressing is about what works for you regardless of what you wear.  Example: Occasionally I will wear a cute dress or a skirt and a ladies top.  But honestly more often than not I'm wearing a geeky guys shirt, short skirt, hosiery, and flats or heels. The glamour thing is fun, but skirts, pantyhose and flats are just plain comfy.  Why can't I look cute and feel comfy at the same time.  (Doesn't hurt that I'm a geek and find geeky girls attractive too, that's why I married one).

Quote from: freakynerd on December 12, 2015, 09:17:36 AM
Not sure if I fit in this site.  Started with women's shoes, progressed to tights and tops.  Tried a dress and it did nothing for me.  Mostly like how the shoes (flats & heels) and some selective tops feel and look.  No real interest in makeup, polish, etc.

You may not have explored this site much you but the people on here are very diverse and you fit right in. We only hope you are comfortable here but you are welcome to stay as long as you like.

Bentley and Freaknerd
I absolutely get where you are both coming from. People seem friendly here and willing to offer constructive advice.
Hugs
Julia

WOW!!!!!!!!!!! Hay can you be my ghost writer I understand there is just that feeling of being of mind body and soul  when I wear women's clothes