I think it's 9 out of 10 times likely to adversely affect a relationship to some extent.

I suppose the point is, we are attracted to what we see, and what we can perceive about another person. That's all there is to go on for humans, other than our own imagination about who a person is. And often the real state or reality of a trans person is completely invisible, unseen, unspoken. This is always going to be a problem if the one person operated on the strength of what they can see or think they know about the other, and the other cannot show what they really are. As trans people we are either carrying hidden issues and presenting as what we don't feel we are, or are presenting as what we feel we are but what our biology contradicts. Or are somewhere between the two.

My experience with sexual relationships clued me in to just how much is assumed about someone on sight, or about them because the gender they appear to be. I think that's the issue with almost all relationships that run into difficulties - you can't see exactly what someone is like ahead of time or in different situations anyway. People just meet, sometimes they become infatuated with what they see, and a whole load of that perception you have of someone is made up in your own head. We might even just fall in love with what is mostly figments of our imagination. But then there's the desire of the body, and I can't really argue that if someone is attracted to one gender body and their partner says they are going to change that radically to another gender, then that is the end of the sexual attraction probably, in most cases.

I feel giving into my female side and transitioning while good for my psyche, wasn't good for my social life. The lady I had future plans with is now just a friend and we have no intimate contact. If we hug at all it's with a pillow between us so she doesn't feel my breasts against her.

As for future relationships, I'm not into men, although if one did ask me out and I liked him I'd accept so who knows where that would lead to, and as for the ladies, I don't think any I know would be interested in a relationship.

Love,
Clare

You need to put an option for, "it's complicated."

My complication is that I am still married and cannot leave. She doesn't want to be with me and me neither with her but we have three kids and a house.

I have no problem with men being attracted to me. I do tell them after I've know them a while. I can't say the reaction has been 100% good. Maybe 70-80%.

I honestly don't know what the future holds dating wise with me. Next year I want to get my FFS and maybe squeeze in SRS toward the end of the year but that is doubtful. I may just do it in 2017 instead to save up my vacation days. Until SRS I don't feel comfortable with sexual relations with anyone. That is the other thing that is holding me back.

But I'm taking it one day at a time...

And I'm prepared to stay single forever. I have good girlfriends who I can hang with anyway.

No,I still have a great relationship with my wife.I have considered myself as trans lesbian liking women only and my wife has been curious being with a woman too lately.It has worked for us both.

As soon as I started coming out in my trans ways I have to say my dating and relationships have actually gotten so much better. It may be the added confidence and relaxed attitude on my behalf, but I'm not really sure. People have been surprisingly accepting of me when it comes to both romantic and sexual escapades. One thing I always make sure to do is be completely honest with whoever I'm interested in and usually they react with respect and they don't mind.

From Bavaria?

Pre Transition/acceptance = Very difficult dating life.. I absolutely HAD to be in a relationship at all times.. I did NOT want to be alone.. Even if the relationship was horrible/abusive/whatever! I didn't care, I'd make it work.

Post Transition/acceptance = I'm not really sure? I really love being single and having the freedom to do or go anywhere and have nobody to answer to. I have thought about dating, and have posted a few profiles on dating sites with several people taking an interest in me, but the thought of starting a relationship kinda bores me lol... Besides that, I don't really know what I want anymore.. I thought for certain I would be a full on lesbian, but interestingly enough, things have changed for me.. It seems to be about smell.. (I guess that's weird) but I dunno.. I can smell a guys B.O. a mile away, and I just get grossed out.. but when a man smells soo good, omg... I swoon, and stare lol

I got off topic a bit there I think.. To answer the question.. I guess if I had an interest, it would be easier now, after transition, then before.. And I'd probably say that's because I now love myself, and have much more confidence. As for my preference? I'm not the lesbian I thought I'd be, that's for sure... Maybe I'm Bi? I dunno :x