hi! i am a 19 year old pre-op ftm transsexual, about to turn 20 in january. i've known that i am trans for close to 5 years now, though i was experiencing dysphoria before that. because i was homeschooled in a christian and (at the time) fairly socially conservative household, i hardly knew that trans people even existed until i was around 15, much less what body dysphoria was or how it felt, so i didn't know how to interpret what i was experiencing until that age. however, in recent years my family's attitudes have changed a lot, and i've mostly socially transitioned - i'm out to my immediate family, all my friends, my professors at college, and i present as male at all times. i'm planning to start my medical transition as soon as the transsexual issues therapist i've picked can see me. hopefully that'll be very soon
im nervous but really excited!!
other than that, i'm an art student currently studying online-only because i couldn't afford to move out of my parents' house in the fall. maybe this is advantageous as i am in the middle of my social and medical transition and i want to avoid making any serious social connections for my career at least until i go on hrt and have my legal documents changed. however, being listed as female and as my birth name on the website - including the discussion forums with my classmates - is kind of killing me. it really disrupted my ability to do schoolwork during the fall; for instance i had to skip discussion forum assignments many times for the sake of my mental health. i even considered dropping out.
during the fall i didn't introduce myself as male to my classmates because it would mean outing myself as trans and i don't necessarily trust all of them with that information - i don't want any trouble. but in the spring semester, i think i would rather just come out and deal with any negative consequences than present myself as something i'm not.
nice to meet you all!
