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How uncomfortable are you when you look at old pictures of yourself?

Started by Polo, November 24, 2015, 09:39:28 PM

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How uncomfortable are you when you look at old pictures of yourself?

Very comfortable
I'm ok with it
I'd rather not
Definitely uncomfortable
Unsure
Other: will explain

AnnieX

I see my pre-transition pictures once in a while on facebook when my friends share old picture. It doesn't bother me seeing them. Most of the tile I feel like I am looking at a stranger. But only thing I do is I request my friend not to tag me in those photos, cos that physical body in the pictures was not me. It was the mask I had to wear till I became my true self.   
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Kylo

I guess I get a bit uncomfortable if my family start going through old pics and start praising my appearance or something in the older photos. I know it's probably not meant to be insulting, but if they're admiring that and not my current look, it does seem like a little like disapproval or lamenting when I'm still right here. A person's look isn't more important than their actual selves.

That was actually one of the most annoying things I heard when coming out to my family. Instant praise for a female body they've never actually seen in full.
"If the freedom of speech is taken away, then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter."
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michelleinil

I have also hated having my picture taken since early teens.  Most of the time when it is "required" >:(  :(  ::) I have a reputation as someone who is hard to work with.  No Duh?!  I do not want to be here or have a history of my unhappy time.
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Venom

I don't see many pictures of me as a kid, but I generally like them as I'm usually wearing clothes I felt comfortable in. I dislike seeing pictures of me as a teen, as puberty made it fairly obvious that I was AFAB despite the boys clothes I wore. I also look incredibly uncomfortable for the most part, I haven't been photogenic for ages. Pics of me as an adult are very hit and miss, but again, I feel pretty uncomfortable seeing them.
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ToniB

I have always had issues with myself in picture's and I have avoided mirrors and Camera's most of My life as they always showed somebody I did not associate as Myself. whenever I pictured myself In my mind I was always female and the camera's and mirrors showed this horrible Male thing So I hated it .Now I look at a Mirror or a photo and see an image that matches my internal image so much better and I feel a lot happier
The girl inside is just as important expecially to Yourself :)
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Belial

Actually I'm more comfortable looking at my old photos. I was looking more andro/male before that.Before I decided to live as a woman. OMG I so hate my photos from recent years. :D Hopefully when I set in motion my plan on "changing look" before everything, I will be able to look at my photos without "OMG, I can't look at it".
X% of male inside.
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Tessa James

Old photos are just another part of the historical reality I accepted when starting transition.  I cannot and would not expunge my memory or those of people who have known me.  Sure photos can be triggering and I am reminded how far we can go at any age.

The last thing I need is a memory eraser or more denial of the truth in my life.  Time will likely ravage all we now know soon enough.  And then a photo image is still just a two dimensional picture and we all have greater depth than that.
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013
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itsApril

I'm okay with it.  They don't have much significance to me any more.  It's like I'm looking at pictures of somebody I used to know but who no longer has anything to do with my life.  I've turned the corner and I'm looking forward, not backwards.
-April
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Punzie

When it comes to really old pictures of myself, it upsets me to look at them, but at the same time since I looked super androgynous growing up I just sort of convince myself that I looked like a boyish girl. Sometimes its sad too. I look back and see that innocent little kid that just wanted to be accepted and it brings back painful memories of my childhood. I never really liked getting my picture taken at all for as long as I remember too. If I could be given the chance to erase every single photo of me from the 4th grade up until now, I'd do it in a heartbeat. Sometimes its just too painful, especially since my mom has my senior picture on the wall outside my bedroom, reminding me everyday when I wake up that, that is how she will always see me... I can't believe I actually gave in and took them in the first place since I skipped picture day my sophomore year of high school due to dysphoria.
My Journey
9/1/2015 Fully accepted myself as Transgender
9/24/2015 First Therapy Session with Therapist
9/25/2015 Joined Susan's Place
2/?/2016 ~ Hopefully starting HRT!
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Jessie Ann

It really depends on the picture.  I have family pictures that I am in with relatives who have passed away or with my kids at various stages of their lives.  I also have pictures that commemorate important events.  All of these are a part of who I am as an individual today.  The pictures reflecting happy and positive periods of my life don't bother me all that much.  There are some that I absolutely hate and can't stand to look at them.  I have no problem with people seeing me as I was and seeing me as I am.  I actually am pretty proud of what I have been able to accomplish in my transition and I want other transgender ladies know that it is possible to dramatically change how the world sees you, and how you see yourself.  You can't do that if you don't acknowledge your past.       
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DanielleA

Mum was going through some old family photos the other day and asked me if I wanted to see some old pics of me after I had just become a foster kid. Initially I declined but later I agreed and it was like looking at a completely different person. She knows that I don't like them but they are her pictures so I won't ask mum to destroy them. Just as long as these pics don't turn up at my wedding or whatever.
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