Carmen C.
Look you've made your point! So why do you continue on about what you've done in changing your looks? Time to move on with your life. Hello!

Two of my friends responded...

Ronald D.
It's kind of a big deal in her life and it took a lot of time and thinking for her to make this decision so let her enjoy the beginning of her life the way she feels it should have always been. More power to her and I look forward to hearing about how her life changes, it's really interesting.

Izzy L.
She didn't get a haircut. This goes way beyond simply changing her looks. She's beginning an entirely new chapter in her life and as her friends we are here to be supportive. Personally, I enjoy hearing about it. This is exciting for her and I want to be here for her and enjoy it with her. Life is full of wonderful moments, but we only get to enjoy for the first time once. Why criticize? Let her have this. Just be happy for her.

The person posted again..

Carmen C.
I'm not criticizing anyone here! I'll let God do the judging here. He will always be man and no one can change that with any kind of operation or operations! God made him and you can't change what God has made. Only a human can change what God has made. To me it is telling God you made a mistake and God never has made any mistake with anyone. We just want to change what God has and had made good from the beginning. You're entitle to your opinion and I am to mind as well. I will not judge him, because he has to answer to what God think when his time is up in the end of his life. If you think your opinion is correct, then so be it. I only go by what the BIBLE teaches and not man or woman wants to change GOD's WORD! Either way have a bless day and God Speed!.

I had been expecting something like this, but didn't know who it would come from so I stuck a spike into it.

QuoteTo ensure my posts about my transition do not impinge on her awareness, I have blocked her from seeing my posts in the future.

Let me say outright God and I are on good speaking terms, and I believe this is the path I was intended to follow in this life. I believe what is supposed to happen later this year is his reward for doing the hard task he required of me, which ended up helping all those people who otherwise might have ended their lives.

God doesn't create your body, he makes your soul, and he made mine female. My mother made my body, and that in this case was imperfect. It was male, but my mind and/or my soul are female.

I have been expecting someone to voice this opinion, and will be leaving the comments here. I ask everyone to respect their right to their opinion and I will not hold her comments against her otherwise.

In this clip, a Grim Reaper takes the soul of a transsexual who dies in an accident. The transsexual asks to go to a church while waiting for their trip to the afterlife. Watch what happens.

I completely agree with you save one thing. God made our soul and our body. It was created in his image. He doesn't make mistakes either... I don't think he made a mistake with either one of us or anyone trans for that matter. We are unique on his eyes and he has created ways for us to be complete. Gender means nothing to God, if it did the angels would have a gender and they are not male or female. I believe gender was introduced to humans in the garden of eden when Adam and eve sinned... until then they had glorified bodies and had no need for it... just like we will have glorified bodies when we die.

The bible is the word of God and I believe what it says but even Jesus said that when he came to earth and died, he fulfilled prophecy and the old ways were done away with. That means that most of the ammo/scripture that is hurled at us is not important but not necessarily relavant since the coming of Christ. The new testament speaks about not judging and Christians forget that their action judge just as much as their words... sometimes more.

There is an interesting passage that I always refer to in Matthew 19 where Jesus speaks about the eunuch. Here's the kicker... the passage makes sense to me as I am sure it will to you without so much of an interpretation. Jesus says to those who will understand, they will understand. Everyone else can skip over it because it doesn't apply to them. Take a look, maybe you've seen this passage, maybe not but it bears sharing. These verses can be very broad but they still make a point.

11 Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. 12 For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."

I wish Christians would understand that this is not something we chose or something we can easily turn off. I struggled for a long time thinking I was failing as a Christian because the devil was tempting me and I was succumbing to sin when that wasn't the case at all. Gender is a man made subject and our soul just doesn't align with the outer shell. What's it matter anyway? Eventually it will be dust anyway!?!? So in reality what are we changing?

I too believe whole heartedly that God is on board with my decision to transition but it's taken me a long time to understand it and have faith that it's true. This is just my perspective... God speaks to each of us differently

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I take a bit different view of god. I don't think he made us the way we are anymore than he made children with birth defects. As he is a loving god, he wouldn't want us to live with pain and suffering when there is a way to cure it. This is the god that I follow.

A god I wouldn't follow would be one who forces people to live in pain and suffering when there was a way to better their life. Carmen appears to follow a god who would inflict pain and suffering on others for no reason.

I remain a member of Susan's for much the same reason you have maintained this site for so many years. We both know the suffering others still live with and in our small way we are making the world a better place. 

We disagree Amanda

We no longer wanted god to rule our lives and instead wanted a king. From then on, we were allowed to create our own destiny instead of being guided by god. We can still chose to be guided by the word of god by accepting his message of love but many don't.

People who judge us are not following the word of god because only god is capable of seeing into our soul and making a proper judgement. The ones who judge us are judging us by their personal view of the world which often isn't true to the word of god.

I despise the "God makes no mistakes, so it's wrong to correct your body" argument. The only time I ever see it trotted out is in relation to transition. Most mainstream Christians don't apply that standard to anyone else who makes other medical changes to their bodies. No one insists that cancer patients undergoing chemo or people bolstering their immune systems with vaccines are in defiance of God's design. It's blatant bigotry in the noxious guise of sanctimonious moralizing.

Quote from: Susan on January 06, 2016, 09:08:21 PM
Let me say outright God and I are on good speaking terms, and I believe this is the path I was intended to follow in this life. I believe what is supposed to happen later this year is his reward for doing the hard task he required of me, which ended up helping all those people who otherwise might have ended their lives.

He gave you a hard task indeed and you have exceeded at it over the past 20 years.  I know one whose life was saved by this site.  I chatted with her partner on FB the other day and they are still together, still much in love 15 years later.

I wish people wouldn't try to use God as the reason for their prejudice. I know God loves me , but I sure haven't been the model human in the eyes of others. My list of human failures would wrap around the earth a few times and then some.

This is why a wear a large crucifix, god loves those of us that have to walk a harder path also. My prayers came true.

I wish I could say that we won't get negative reactions, but we do. At some point, we have to decide how we are going to react to them and if we are going to let them get to us. I wish I could say I have done a good job of not letting it get to me, but truth be told it still can get to me. In the end, I just wish they knew how we feel when they say the hurtful things that they can. Hang in there. You are far stronger than they are. Hugs
Mariah

There will be always be someone who tries to use their religion against you being transgender. Those people are best filed under "Forget About Them". My mother is quite religious and yet she uses her religion as a means to accept my transition. A shame more people can't take that path.

Look at the positive side Sue!

You can take them off the Christmas Card list!

If you believe that God created everything and he does not make mistakes, then basing your actions on God's desires is meaningless. He created both the conditions which produced the knowledge of how to alleviate gender dysphoria, and the conditions which produced the belief that transgender individuals should not alter their bodies.

Susan, I am so glad you have received so much positive reaction to coming out, but am sorry you were attacked by this jerk (I don't like to talk about anyone that way, but in this case I've got to make an exception.)

It really bothers me too that someone like Carmen invokes the name of God and claims to speak for God and a whole religion (in this case presumably Christanity) in such mean-spirited comments. It's this kind of hypocrisy that has made it difficult for me to even want to participate in the church. In my faith, I don't for a minute think that a good God would ever treat people in this way, quite the opposite - Carmen is demonstrating the antithesis of agape love.

AmandaDanielle - I think there are a lot of similarities of my spiritual journey and yours - I don't think there's any reason to be ashamed if our Gender identity doesn't exactly match our body. Much of the constructs of feminine and masculine expression in society are arbitrary cultural things having nothing to do with morality as the poor soul that commented negatively on Susan's page seems to think.

Big hug, Susan! We talked about this just the other day. Of course there are going to be people like this, we're not living for them, though. We're living for ourselves. 

Hugs, Devlyn

Hi Susan Small minded people tend to hide behind religion as they are unable to accept the real world this
Carmen seems to be of this type . not all churches are as hard headed and bigoted there are a lot of very accepting clergy and congregations in the World so do not let this narrow minded bigoted woman have any effect on You .She is the one with a problem so just forget her shut her out and get on with Your life .One that You have richly deserved by the way .I for one am a direct result of this wonderful site you run I would never had the courage or knowledge to deal with my situation without this site .so I Salute and applaud You and thank You with all My heart GOD Bless from a practicing Catholic

Toni Bowers

This is one of my pet peeves too. The God not making mistakes thing - It has to be one of the most silly, gut reactions anyone has ever come up with. It seriously sounds as though it would come from an anti-God not the creator himself.

First of all God is a matter of faith and to proudly proclaim your understanding of him, when others may not share the faith is immature and indicative of your own doubts. I'm not sure why Christians cannot see this but it is shouted to me every time i see people bring him into it. God allows for all sorts of challenges for people, maybe they should apply their own experience to the silly argument. "God doesn't make mistakes so your struggle with your over-eating is not of God" you could insert many things into that equation.

The fragility of gender and some religious people's obsession with it are truly astounding.

I had been blocked by another die hard Christian friend who didn't say thing just blocked me outright.

My older sister isn't talking to me, and her gay son thinks she disowned me like she disowned him when he came out to her. He described his own mom as crazy.   She accepted it when I told her years ago. I guess people change. Both he and his sister are accepting.

I gave my step father the chance to say if he wants me to continue to visit him each week on Sundays or not. As I could tell he was distressed last week at his house, and I strongly suspect he was showing his feelings at my nieces wedding dinner during the week. Waiting on his response if he wants to try or not. I told him I was willing to give him that chance. But made clear that I am now and always will be Susan.

I think the "God doesn't make mistakes" thing comes from people claiming they were "born in the wrong body."  While it's technically true, I personally wouldn't use that description for being trans, as Christians can use it to say "well that means God must have put your soul in the wrong body, and God doesn't make mistakes". 

I prefer the neuroscience explanation - the brain developed female, while the body develops male (or vice versa). Then you can compare it to other neurological disorders - no one would dismiss autism by claiming "God doesn't make mistakes" so why would you use it to dismiss being trans, which is technically a neurological condition.  Also, if babies can be born missing a significant portion of their brain (anencephaly), then is it really such a stretch to believe babies could be born with the brain as the opposite sex.  No one would say "well God intended that baby to be born without a cerebral cortex and die within 2 days, so we shouldn't look for a cure because that would be going against God".

They're saying that to justify their prejudice.

I like the way you put things windlep. I like to talk about our differences without using the term disorder because it can sometimes be interpreted as there's something wrong with us. There may be things wrong with us but just being trans is not one of them. I look at it like this, if someone still can't understand how I am wired that's ok, but I hope that will not affect their ability to treat me with respect and if they value my friendship they'll do their best to understand me more over time. Such things should not affect how we treat or love one another. Recently my son told me he is gay. I don't understand gayness (although being trans helps build an affinity) but his telling me just makes me love him more and want to know him more.