I still don't know if I want to transition or not. I mean I haven't even talked things out with a therapist yet. It all just seems so scary, but I'm reaching a point soon where I have to make a major financial decision.

Due to being an incredibly cheap person in general and working full-time throughout most of high school and college (plus I took 2 years off after HS where I was still living at home with virtually no expenses) I've saved a decent amount of money. I have $30,000 in cash and another $5,000 in a 401k account (although that might go down this year if the markets tank like many analysts are expecting them too).

I've gotten through two years of community college without taking out any loans but I'm moving on to an real university this fall so tuition is going to get a lot more expensive. Originally I was just going to continue to pay for my tuition & books out-of-pocket like I did in CC, but I'm starting to debate whether or not I should just take out student loans instead and hold onto the cash in case I decide to transition. Having that as a safety net would do a lot to alleviate some of my greater concerns that are holding me back (unemployment, homelessness, etc.)

One thing I absolutely know I want to do regardless of if I transition or not is get rid of my beard. I hate facial hair with a passion. Unfortunately I won't be able to start laser for another 6 months at the earliest as I'm on accutane right now.

You need to get off accutane as that is a very dangerous drug. I would suggest you see a gender therapist with the goal of getting on blockers/HRT which will help you clear up your skin and help with the transgender feelings. Beard remove and working on your voice could allow you to live full time and this should relieve much of the discomfort you feel. If reassignment surgery is you goal, you would need to cross live for a year or more. Because of money issues, I cross lived for two years and some do it longer. Strange as it may sound, the life is what we need and reassignment surgery is the finishing touch.

Many universities will allow you to attend while cross living so it's up to you as to how you handle your transition. You may not have enough money for everything including surgery, but there is plenty for a good start. Also insurance can cover many of the costs so read your policy and if you are attending a major university, your health package may include transgender benefits as well.

I'd hold on to cash and work around it

Quote from: Dena on January 09, 2016, 06:44:29 PM
You need to get off accutane as that is a very dangerous drug.

No worries, I check in with my doctor every month to make sure my its not damaging my liver.
I've been on it for a couple months and the only side effects I've experienced are the usual dry lips.

It has a high risk of causing depression. Combined with the depression you already feel from being TG it can be dangerous.  You may not be able to tell how much depression is caused by the accutane and how much is cause by being TG. You need to be honest with your doctor about any depression you have whatever the cause when you are on the drug.

To be perfectly honest, anyone who is willing to go as far as taking accutane is already depressed due to their skin problems.

Not to the point of suicide and that drug can cause that much depression. Again one very effective way of controlling acne is the blockers used in the HRT package. Much of your skin problems and TG feeling are caused by testosterone. The blockers will cause a chemical castration removing the testosterone from your system, clearing your skin and helping with your TG feeling. I had acne as a teen and it lasted into my 20's. We didn't have blockers but the combination of HRT and the reassignment surgery have done a wonderful job of clearing up my skin and depression.