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References for a job...

Started by makipu, January 10, 2016, 09:52:38 PM

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makipu

I contemplated about putting this into the nonbinary section since that's how I look but I would still welcome any answers to something that may be common among binary people.
I don't know if employers actually do call professional references upon hiring but right now I have no one. I was told that I could use my college professors but that's an issue in itself since I absolutely don't plan on "coming out" to anyone so I am stuck. I am also thinking on the contrary, I am "outing" myself not intentionally by simply being me; as in: Even though my legal documentations state male, I don't look like a typical dude.
I am not going to bother thinking what people think of me but I just don't know how to get those needed references. It's part of the application process and I am stuck. Did I mention that I have no social skills either?
I am male because I say so and nothing more.
I don't have to look or act like one therefore.
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Ms Grace

I don't think it is an uncommon problem, especially for those wishing to make a clean break between one job and another when they transition. Unfortunately it sounds like you will need to have a talk with your professors - surely there are couple who would be supportive and discreet (and give you a great reference)?
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
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makipu

The issue is actually not the professors themselves who may be open minded but my main issue is that being known as the "she" I was most definitely not was already messed up and since I never corrected them (due to the lack of documentation proof) it won't be natural if I do it now. It's something I am against so that's why it's not possible.
The lightest way I can put it is like to me, being known as a female is a disease. I can't begin to explain how much this internal bodily suffering ruined my life.
Even if not professors themselves, I wouldn't even use the people (once again, who knew me as 'she') I knew in the past and cut my ties with.  I was thinking of family members but then I don't want it to be found out either.
I am male because I say so and nothing more.
I don't have to look or act like one therefore.
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Deborah

The answer is yes.  The people doing the hiring do often call the references.


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Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love that is contingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a healthy, unafraid human being....  - Dan Barker

U.S. Army Retired
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FTMax

It depends what kind of job you're applying for. Some have a more in depth screening process than others.

I personally hire people with some regularity. I have yet to ever call a reference. As long as they provide me with transcripts or a DD-214 with a resume that does not look like it was made by a child, and they seem personable enough, I will hire them. But the positions I'm hiring for are very entry level. For something requiring more demonstrable experience or something with security concerns, I'd expect them to call at least your most recent employer or ask for a professional reference.

I'm actually emailing an old supervisor right now to request that he email my background investigator at the agency I'm hoping to be hired on at. He doesn't know about my transition, so I've got to remind him who I was, explain who I currently am, and get him to agree to talk to someone else on my behalf. I'll let you know how it goes :)
T: 12/5/2014 | Top: 4/21/2015 | Hysto: 2/6/2016 | Meta: 3/21/2017

I don't come here anymore, so if you need to get in touch send an email: maxdoeswork AT protonmail.com
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