This may or may not be strange but the more seriously I try to work toward transition, the less I want to deal with people on a social level. I basically just hang out with my dog all the time. I still identify outwardly as male and sort of think that it may be due to the fact that I'm just frickin' done with being that person. Did others of you find yourselves shutting down before transition and did your urge to interact with people improve again afterward?

My social life blossomed after I transitioned. I felt more relaxed, more open and more in touch with myself. Hopefully you will find the same, but remember you still need to make the effort.

I am so guilty of socially shutting down. I was in an abusive relationship when it started. Now I just feel wierd because I am that guy who is transitioning at a large company with 5,000 employees. Noone thinks bad about it and actually people make passes,  but I just feel weird.

I feel that I switched from a person to a sex object. Then the next minute an outcast.

I relate to this so much! It sucks...I use to drag so I'm use to the attention and looks and it's not weird or ever negative but recently I feel awkward and weird.

I would try to join a support group it did help me alot even though I wasn't a fan of the idea but once you see others like you it puts things in perspective on what you should be grateful for and what perhaps you could work more towards. plus sometimes you meet nice people who share common interests

but It's a difficult period and you have to push through that because that's mostly insecurities talking.

   Ms. Grace: Thank you, that's exactly what I was hoping to hear from someone. Effort (but primarily motivation) are what I completely lack right now. Selling a false bill of goods gets tiresome after thirty nine years.

   ChasingAlice: I relate pretty well to two things you bring up. My last relationship was with an extremely abusive woman and lasted almost four years, all the ones before that were pretty awful too. Ugh.... It really brought me to the point where I was ready to let go of all that conditioning about marriage and babies and the white picket fence. A mixed blessing perhaps. The other thing that I relate to is the "sex object" topic. It's possibly the only thing that I don't look forward to as a part of womanhood. I'm most afraid of having old friends or family members suddenly finding me attractive. Hopefully it won't happen.


    Alexi90: Yeah, I've been thinking about visiting the local support group again. The first time was probably six years ago and I wasn't really ready. We'll have to see if dogs are allowed in. Finding an excuse for a dog sitter might prove difficult. It was exciting to meet other people whose minds seemed very similar to my own. What a life it is.

   

That kind of thing is also a sign of depression, which is quite common unfortunately.

Yeah I get like that so much. I haven't began to seriously transition in a physical way with hormones and surgery just yet, but I get into my moments where I become mute and its like I can't talk. I'm not sure if that's what you mean. Or I just don't want to be around anyone and I shut everyone out like Elsa did from Frozen. I agree with Anony, that this could very well be a sign of clinical depression. Might wanna go get that checked out just to be on the safe side of things.

Before transition, my social life was non existent.

I was so worried about how others might react, that rather than be honest about my situation, I shut myself away and didn't do much of anything. I didn't leave the house for weeks at a time, and when my friends did try to make plans, I always made excuses. I did anything I could to avoid social situations and became a total recluse.

As a result, and unsurprisingly enough, lots of relationships suffered.

Nowadays although I'm hardly a social butterfly, things have improved. The friendships I did manage to keep are now stronger than ever, and in social circumstances I no longer feel anxious all the time.

Sometimes we get so overwhelmed and consumed by our fears that we forget that there is a whole world out there beyond transition.

The most important thing I have learned is that even when you don't feel like reaching out to people, it can be good to go a little out of your comfort zone. It might be difficult at first, but one day you might end up thanking yourself.

Well...

I find myself not wanting to see any family members in person before I start seeing some actual results from transition/hormones. I live 100s of miles away from them so seeing them is a big deal and I don't want them to see a woman next time they behold me. Not after all the talking they've been doing about my transition.

I'm laying low until I see some progress.