Hi, I deleted my old thread because I wrote it on some of the worst days of my life when I was going through a hard time with my partner. So wanted to do a proper introduction and chat with people
My name is Sophie, I'm 28 and have two kids with my partner. I'm a heterosexual (I think) cis woman, and my partner is trans, assigned male at birth, at the moment goes by he pronouns still, and is trying to be happy and not transition. He doesn't know if he wants to ever transition and says he never will want to. He usually seems happy and able to deal with the dysphoria. I have always tried to be supportive, have struggled a bit at times but feel overall I've been supportive and always said transition if you want and we'll be friends. I just don't see the relationship working if he transitions, but maybe I'll give it a go, maybe not. The whole thing makes me anxious and sad because I'm worried about losing him.
Things have been rough, but have been good for weeks now, great in fact. I thought things would be fine. Then the last few days he's been tired and super moody. I don't know if part of the moodiness is due to gender dysphoria or if it's unrelated. Anyway, he got really moody and mean to me last night, and when I told him to stop treating me badly, then he left the house and isn't back this morning. I get that people can get tired and moody, he has had not much sleep the last two nights...but I get bad sleep every night since I wake several times a night to feed the baby. So I really didn't deserve how he was treating me last night, and it was completely out of order to leave the house, especially since today our oldest child turns 3. He also got mad because I asked him to help more around the house, and he said he does enough, which I find quite sexist since I do a lot more than him...I know he doesn't believe this but he pretty much said it's my job to do the housework, since I'm a woman, which is ironic because he's a woman...
He loves the kids and is usually a great dad, and I know he has stuff he's struggling with, but I also have plenty of stressful things in my life. I'm so worried about him right now, but also very upset and feel like me and my son deserve a massive apology. We're very much in love, but I'm so sick of dealing with this because of the way it makes him act like he hates me. I know he's going through so much, I don't understand fully but I know being trans can be extremely difficult for people to deal with, but it is hard for us partners too.
