Hello to everyone.
    I've recently discovered that I was trans gendered M -> F (Sep - Oct 2015) For me it was like Dominoes, I pushed the first one, and the rest of the pieces started to fall into position. My whole life and so many behaviors started to make sense. I've spent my life avoiding what I am and I don't want to do that anymore.

   At first I thought I would just be a cross dresser but that very quickly wasn't enough. It wasn't really me. I went through the euphoria of "something new" where I just wanted everything now. I wanted hormones, SRS, Breasts and a pretty feminine face and voice. while I still want those things the reality of the situation has sunk in more. I know this is a journey and that all those things will take some time. Although I wish some things would happen faster than they are.

    I'm fortunate in that my family and close friends have been pretty good to really great. In shopping for clothes and make up I've met some really wonderful woman that have been very helpful as well. This has certainly made the whole thing easier. I know what my end game is; to get SRS. I'm just not sure what steps, and in what order, I need to take to get from where I am to there though.

    I have learned a lot over these few months but there is so much more to know and figure out. Thank you in advance to each person here that will help me to be the woman I was meant to be.

Sarah

Hi SarahElizabeth, welcome to Susan's. I know what you mean by Dominioes. It's hard to stop once they all star falling. So true, it takes time, don't I know it. It's a marathon and not a spring unfortunately. I'm glad your family and friends have been supportive. I look forward to seeing you around the forums. Good luck and Hugs
Mariah

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Hi Sarah Elizabeth 

Welcome to Susan's    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Hugs

V M

Welcome to Susan`s Place!!

Yes, been there and got the T-shirt or should I say blouse?

Once I did the first thing, it became a second and then a third and eventually I became the woman I was after keeping her inside of me for all of those years. I am a very late in transitioning but as far as I'm concerned, better late than never.

It hasn't been easy, I have been accepted and rejected. Looked at and been challenged and verbally discriminated against but I have two things most of my detractors don't have and that is courage and integrity.

Courage to accept and be who I am and the integrity to stay the distance when it could have been easier to throw in the towel and go back into the closet. If I did that, then they would claim to be the better of me and they are not any better than me.

Hope you enjoy yourself here at Susan's and all the best to you!

Love,
Clare

Hi Sarah Elizabeth and welcome to Susan's.

Hi Sarah, welcome to Susan's Place! I'm up near Boston. Grab some snacks and I'll be seeing you around the site!

Hugs, Devlyn

QuoteFor me it was like Dominoes, I pushed the first one, and the rest of the pieces started to fall into position.

Yes, it's an amazing experience ... some kind of sudden revelation.

Hugs,
Aly

Thank you everyone for the kind welcome. It was a quick progression for me but the signs have been there for a long time. I even have a particular conversation which is hanging around the back of my head. I said to my friend a couple years ago "in some ways I'm more like a women..... But I'm a guy" but you know, I'm not really. I'm a girl through and through. I love chick flicks I'm sappy and hopelessly romantic. And many other things. I'm more nmy mid thirties and just now learning who I really am... Sooo exciting 😁

Hi Sarah,

I feel that I am in a similar situation to yourself.  The realization was out of the blue and rapid.  I have made similar comments about being like a girl before.  Turns out I exist somewhere in between, but I was a master at ignoring/repressing that aspect of myself.  Is the 1981 attached to your name your birth year? If so, me too.

Amber

Hi Amber    Yes 1981 is my birth year. Actually my birthday is this thursday (the 25) Although it has been a quick progression for me the signs have been there for a long time. I know what you mean about repressing it. I've wanted for so long to dress up as a women but never actually would. I would even force myself not to look at womens clothing when walking through department stores and such. that's actually what started the ball rolling, I ordered a skirt off Amazon. The rest as they say is Herstory...

I look forward to interacting with you through this site.  It's always nice to find out were not alone in this.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-N900A using Tapatalk

It is a sad thing to realize that society... American freedom.... And "open minded" people have taught us that we must repress a part of ourselves.... Sometimes the biggest part.... Because we do t fit in with "normal" people. I told my wife about loving stockings and high heels... And thought that was it.... Then the dominoes started falling as you put it.... Bought a skirt, a dress, and now I have two full wardrobes.... We'll my fem wardrobe is never full.... I didn't feel comfortable until I did a bunch of reading and realized that we are only doing what used to normal... Dresses were made for men back in the day. But then I realized that I want to be pretty and have a girls night too.... Welcome.e to the site, I am new here myself, and I have already been helped immensely by reading other stories and advice. And it kind of feels good to go d another person close to my age going through this!!!

Tasha

Hi Amber & Tasha 
I was amazed by how common it is to not identify with the sex you're born as. I actually still find it a little hard to believe.
Tasha I totally agree about being "taught that we must repress part of ourselves." the pressure to conform with what society expects you to be can be overwhelming. In a way that's what started me on this journey. a little over a year and half ago I got my tongue pierced. I kept myself from doing it for a long time because it is seen as something women do although guys do it too. Its just not as common. I finally decided to do it because I wanted to and to hell with what anyone else thinks. It is, I believe, that act of doing what I wanted to do regardless of what others thought that gave me the freedom to discover myself in a way that I had never allowed.
just a random thought "and the truth shall set you free" i do feel free'er then i ever have and I think i may have just scratched the surface.
I look forward to talking to you more in the future.

Sarah

I was going to quote you, but "I kept myself from doing because it seemed like something women do" shaped my life for many years. If I hadn't had a few beers, and  been in exactly the right conversation with my wife, I wouldn't be here now. After the dominoes started falling, I talked to her about all the things I felt I did that were feminine, and she said that she had never even noticed... Once I let myself become more comfortable and let go of trying to hide my femininity, she started noticing and asking why I never did things before, like the way I cross my legs now even. I know that men do it to, but I've always seen it as feminine. The biggest reassurance that I've had so far, is when I finally wore a pair of 5inch caged heels in public... I have been looked at slightly weird, stared at by a teenage girl, and complimented by a woman for them. I realized then that I have experience all those things while even repressing myself. So, how is it all that different? And let me tell you, last month my wife and I had our anniversary weekend.... Left the kids with my sis, and went out of town where I dressed outside for the first time. I had planned on going farther than flared jeans and heels, but not much, until I was wearing a skirt, with fake nails on, toes painted, and got locked out on the back balcony of our hotel room at 2 am. I had to climb down, walk almost 2 miles to another hotel to call the night manager. I was scared as hell, but after not  being treated poorly, I decided that for our dinner that night, I'd wear obviously feminine clothes and makeup (nails still do e of course).  All this with my 4 inch long beard. The waitress was super talkative to us, and the busboy went out of his way to make conversation as well. I know it was obvious that I was a man in women's clothes, but I was treated like a person. Society has hope, and is getting better about not teaching bigotry, but so many men feel threatened by our (our their) femininity, that they won't stop the cycle of teaching kids that there are only two genders, one on one end, and one on the other of an infinite spectrum. Maybe the next generation will be better, but that is up to people like us (or those like us braver than I).

Awesome talking with you, can't wait to continue!!! Sorry about being so long winded LOL....

Tasha

Hi friends 

The balance of this conversation has been moved to General discussions

Hugs