Rawrrr!! (angry rant)

November Fox · February 07, 2016, 02:34:42 PM

I will keep it civil.
But if there was ever a conglomerate of uncivil thoughs going through my head...

I am so tired of people (some people, definitely not a majority), in whose book sex change equals "catasthropic mistake". How did it ever acquire this reputation of "unsurpassable blooper" that only people who are really wonky would make?

Thankfully most reactions I get are positive, so I guess I shouldn´t react too harshly - yet I think it´s such a load of (...) to just assume that this is by definition a Horrible Thing To Do.

I wish I could change people´s mindset about it.

Peep · February 07, 2016, 04:17:05 PM

This annoys me too. It's not only wrong it's just rude. You don't tell someone who quits their job to get one they're more interested in or gets a new haircut that it's a terrible idea once it's done, even if you think that. Why would your gender (which is even more personal than your job or looks) be up for discussion?

I think it's because of the trans rights and gay rights issues - these are visible as political issues and so the whole thing seems like a political choice or a 'lifestyle' to other people and so they think it's up for debate, when it's really not.

November Fox · February 07, 2016, 05:30:00 PM

The thing is, I guess, that I don´t see what the big deal is.

There is a weird double standard involved (in my experience), which makes it into this "menace", while other afflicitions (such as PTSD) are equally unbearable (depending on the situation), but there´s no huge fuss over that.

When I told people I had PTSD, they were like "oh" but did not react like it was this Huge Catastrophy (when in fact it was), and when I tell these same people I feel male, they react like it´s the end of the world. Go figure.

I totally understand why people would be worried, as it involves surgery and hormones - but they think that we´d transform into completely different people (maybe they think I will become the Hulk)

Emileeeee · February 07, 2016, 05:40:27 PM

And yet nobody has a problem when someone can't handle looking their age and transforms their entire face with plastic surgery.

Peep · February 08, 2016, 09:54:57 AM

Quote from: Emileeeee on February 07, 2016, 05:40:27 PM
And yet nobody has a problem when someone can't handle looking their age and transforms their entire face with plastic surgery.

Or when they want to reverse cosmetic surgery or tattoos - things that they did to themselves instead of just grew

Kylo · February 11, 2016, 03:39:44 PM

Hah, yeah.

Reminds me of the people who used to say things like I shouldn't try this job or apply for that job because it didn't fit my personality, and I'd say "so what kinda job you think I should do then?" and they'd come up blank. Lots of complaints and no answers.

If it's a catastrophic mistake, you gotta wonder what they think your life will be like for the rest of it in a body you hate, or can't feel anything in. Makes me wonder too if some of those people just hate their own bodies in a different way and think you're trying to 'cheat' your way out of unhappiness, doing something they wouldn't dare do. Though it's not similar at all to just wishing for a nicer looking body or a better nose or something. Not that many people understand that.

Peep · February 11, 2016, 03:54:24 PM

Yeah i've got loads of things on my body that if i didn't have dysphoria i'd probably obsess about, but never do anything about, because they're different. dysphoria is different from having flaws. if it was the same there wouldn't be so many guys overjoyed about their flat chests despite the scarring. having a wonky nose just means i've got a wonky nose, it doesn't dictate anything else in my life, whereas having visible 'female' breasts does.

WorkingOnThomas · February 12, 2016, 02:54:31 AM

Elizabeth Bennet said it best: "I am only resolved to act in that manner, which will, in my own opinion, constitute my happiness, without reference to you, or to any person so wholly unconnected with me."

November Fox · February 12, 2016, 04:44:45 AM

Quote from: WorkingOnThomas on February 12, 2016, 02:54:31 AM
Elizabeth Bennet said it best: "I am only resolved to act in that manner, which will, in my own opinion, constitute my happiness, without reference to you, or to any person so wholly unconnected with me."

You´re absolutely right Thomas (well, Bennet is haha) and I am working on not identifying with others opinions. This person (who said this) was very close to me so it did affect me, and I noticed the same attitude in other people who had difficulty with it (seeing transitioning to another gender as a catastrophy per sé).

But yeah I know.

Kylo · February 12, 2016, 05:48:29 AM

There are some risks involved - surgery risks, maybe some risks from discrimination, ostracism, family problems... but I wouldn't say "catastrophic" risks. If that's the reason they think that, that is.

WorkingOnThomas · February 12, 2016, 06:12:03 AM

Hey, my mother is convinced that this is the end of the world. Now, I love her, and respect that she is entitled to her opinions. But the simple fact of the matter is that she is completely and wholly ignorant - and does not even want to be educated - on the subject. Not a thing I can do about it. At the end of the day, it is *my* life. It may not be much of one, but it is mine. And I'm not going to live the rest of it as I did the first half (assuming an average lifespan). If that upsets other people, so be it. If it causes them to say stupid or even hurtful stuff - again, not my problem.

Peep · February 12, 2016, 03:38:45 PM

I just wish someone around me would try to see a positive side, I'm doing the pessimism thing fine on my own...

stephaniec · February 12, 2016, 05:50:56 PM

I can understand why people have a negative view of wanting to change your sex , but really it's none of their damn business.

Sharon Anne McC · February 13, 2016, 06:21:34 AM

*

If transition was so bad - such a big mistake - then

   - Why did they not consider some form of reversion to transition?

   - Why do those who do reversion eventually return with improved focus to successfully transition better the second time?

   - Why do many who completed transition years ago return for revision to get their new and improved model?

These questions are based upon my un-scientific observations from the past 40+ years.

Hmm.

*

November Fox · February 14, 2016, 08:54:49 AM

Quote from: Peep on February 12, 2016, 03:38:45 PM
I just wish someone around me would try to see a positive side, I'm doing the pessimism thing fine on my own...

Yes!!

The negative view is probably still a thing from the past; a cultural mindset "we" (as a culture) used to have about certain things, probably influenced in a big way by religion. It is my experience that it is mostly older people who see transitioning as an unnaceptable thing to do.

There has been a lot of changes in this regard and I´m sure the old minset will change even more in years to come. It´s just frustrating that some generations are still stuck in the past, but nothing much you can do about it, I guess. All there is left is just to transition, and then they can see that it wasn´t a "catastrophy", as they put it.

News:

Rawrrr!! (angry rant)

November Fox

November Fox

Emileeeee

WorkingOnThomas

November Fox

WorkingOnThomas

November Fox