I want to thank the woman who helped me start accepting who I am she is the first person I got to know who is transgender and knowing her helped me. She doesn't know that she helped me and don't want to go in babbling when I thank her or offend her. I was thinking of saying after some small talk "I know you don't know it but you have helped me in a big way and I would like to invite you to a party to meet Kristy" does that sound okay?

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I am no expert on this subject.  But the first thing that comes to mind is a delivery of flowers to her place of work with a card thanking her and inviting her to the party.

Any way you decide to thank her will be the right way. She will feel a sense of elation for the sincere gratitude you have to offer. Words are fine. A small token is fine. A party? Oh Yeah!

Cindi

I've considered the same type of dilema.  I suggest getting the conversation anywhere near trans issues.  Then just thank her and invite her over.  That's the way i would do it, anyway.

I thanked her today she was touched!