OK, so, facial hair is determined by genetics and we don't know how long it will take to come in.

We do know that shaving hair doesn't make it come in thicker.  There's only one way to see how much coverage you have, and that's just letting it grow in.

But how do you deal with the in-between look?  It just looks so bad that I have given up and shaved time and time again.

I promised myself many times that I'll just let it come in and trim it with a clipper when it gets too scraggly but then I look in the mirror and see a high school boy looking back instead of the almost-50-yr-old I am and NOPE, shave it off again. 

Any tips on how to be patient, or how to look halfway decent while the stubble is dark on the chin and light and patchy on the jawline? 

i shave it. honestly, every time i see a teenage boy with REALLY bad facial hair, i'm just like...i know the facial hair is cool to have, but that needs to be maintained or you'll hate yourself looking at pictures. like EVERY guy goes through that weird "i don't wanna shave" phase it seems like but the facial hair just looks SO bad, i can't deal with it. i dealt with looking younger until it came in (and still is coming in). my facial hair does come in pretty fast and i can see when the pattern changes (like more hair going up the sides of my cheek because that's where i don't have much facial hair yet). the only time i let it grow out to "see" any kind of improvement in it from before is if i'm not at school or work for a bit.

I shaved the first few times I started noticing mine and it was so patchy. After a while I stopped and only trimmed it. I use bead oil and a comb, also washing it with beard soap/shampoo. My facial hair has definitely started to come in a lot better now.  I didn't really care what people thought of it and leaving it alone worked for me. I also use facial scrubs every night when I shower. Not sure if that helps but I feel like it kind of does.

I don't know if this will help your problem but there is an actor called Don Johnson on a TV series called Miami Vice who alway appeared on the show with about 3 days worth of beard growth. The trick was using an electric razor with a shim to eliminate a close trim. Electric hair clippers often come with a shim set in order to give buzz cuts. You may be able to remove the longer hairs while the shorter hair reaches the desired length by adjusting the shim size.

Initially I was shaving at least once a week or every other week because I hated how it looked in between. But then I let it grow out a bit for my bottom surgery consult, and I actually really liked the way it filled in. I had to shave it again shortly after for an interview, but now I'm letting it grow in again. I'm sure it looks goofy. I've got great sideburns and a good patch under my chin/neck, and there are some hairs that are growing in between but they're nowhere close to connecting.

I also use a bunch of different face stuff, and I feel like since I started using all that my skin has gotten better AND my facial hair has filled in more.

Mine has started coming in faster now, and if the two sides of my face would just even up, I might let it grow. But until that happens, I'll keep shaving. I don't shave as often as I should because I like seeing (and feeling! ) what hair there is, but adolescent scruff is just not a good look for someone my age.

If I go on a looong canoe trip this summer, I'll probably let it grow in and see what it looks like after a month or so.

Quote from: Dena on March 14, 2016, 05:41:41 PM
I don't know if this will help your problem but there is an actor called Don Johnson on a TV series called Miami Vice who alway appeared on the show with about 3 days worth of beard growth. The trick was using an electric razor with a shim to eliminate a close trim. Electric hair clippers often come with a shim set in order to give buzz cuts. You may be able to remove the longer hairs while the shorter hair reaches the desired length by adjusting the shim size.

LOL, 80s flashback. Teal and mauve squiggles, narrow ties - it's all coming back.  :-)

My aim is to have that all-over stubble look, but because it grows so slowly and the bristles are light on the jawline but dark on the chin, my challenge is having enough patience to wait for the stubble to get long enough to trim.  It just looks... bad and sloppy.  It no longer looks like a woman with stray goat hairs and peach fuzz, but it does look like a teenaged boy rather than a grown man.

Proud of myself for going a full week and being out at social events with bad chin-beard look, but I don't know if I can stay strong and not touch the razor for much longer. 

I honestly just shave. I have 7 little brothers and frankly,  I've seen them with scraggly beards and I want no part in that. Also, I work in mental health and before my current job I was a preschool teacher. Having scraggly beard looks bad when you're talking to parents or government officials with social welfare. 

The guys in my family take 7 years plus to get decent beards so I'm in for the long haul. The nice thing about shaving every other day though, is that I know where the hair is and I can see new growth when it's coming in.

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I threw out my razor to be honest with you. I bought a pair of clippers and that was it. I didn't care what anybody thought of my facial hair! Still don't. If it doesn't suit me then I'll shave it but I'm happy with having hair on my face. It feels comforting!

I'm always posting in these threads because I want to give advice to every hopeful beard grower! Sure mine isn't the best but I've come a long way and I've learned so much within the two years I've been on testosterone.

I posted a beard journal today that you can watch me track my progress on! I'll be glad to answer any question you have.

https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,206436.msg1831778.html#msg1831778

Quote from: Rengar on March 19, 2016, 06:58:14 PM
I threw out my razor to be honest with you. I bought a pair of clippers and that was it. I didn't care what anybody thought of my facial hair!

I only really care about what two people think, my spouse and myself, and sadly we both think the uneven raggedy-ass stubble I am currently sporting looks really bad.  Too long and dark in the goatee area, and light and skewing in all directions everywhere else.  I don't want to embarrass my sweetie or myself when we are out in public and it's getting to be that bad. 

Think I'm going to have to invest in a beard trimmer that's just for stubble.  Thirty or forty bucks will be worth it if I no longer look like I belong in "Deliverance".  Keeping everything the same length while the hair goes from vellus to terminal may help me avoid the razor for a while longer. 

^ that is exactly what I did.

I have a very thick red/brown chin area, and very thick brown corner of jaw and up area, but everything else is still thickening up. I no longer have big gaps in hair, it's just not as thick on my upper lip or where my head hair and sideburns connect. So instead of shaving, I got a really nice trimmer that can give just stubble or longer beards (I think up to 1.5 inches).  It was about 50 bucks on Amazon (pm me if you want the specific model). It has worked great for me. I do keep a cheaper trimmer as well for my neck and for trimming the edges straight because it's smaller and easier to maneuver. However, even though I don't have a super thick beard, yet, keeping it all one length while it fills in helps it look much more presentable. I work in an office building so early pubescent facial hair patterns are not really "treasured"

Quote from: Dex on March 25, 2016, 12:40:01 PM
I got a really nice trimmer that can give just stubble or longer beards (I think up to 1.5 inches). 

Yes, this is the answer. I found a stubble trimmer with a dial on it to set length  https://wisebeards.com/#best_beard_trimmer_for_stubble and now I'll just keep my beard and 'stache areas trimmed to a neat shadow and shave everything that's outside the "authorized" beard/stache area so it all looks proper and professional.  Once it's darker and thicker I'll let it go longer but for now this is best. 

Yeah, the dial is perfect. I use the  Philips Norelco QT4070. It has a dial on it for length (which is much easier than swapping out guides). The article above is a great guide for finding exactly what works best for you.

I started with a cheap $15 trimmer but having a nice one definitely works much better. I don't think I've "shaved" in months. Trimming seems to work much better all around.

I've been shaving since I was twelve (hormonal imbalance). Starting this year, though, I partially stopped since I'm living full time. I don't shave off my chin scruff since it is thick enough  to look like a little goatee when I grow it out. I do, however, trim it. The two patches of fur I can grow at the sides of my mouth come off though. I tried giving it four months to see if it would fill in any further, but it wasn't anywhere close to looking like a moustache and I'm not going for the fu manchu look. As to what other people think of it? I really don't care. I'm not on T yet, and this is the only thing about my body I like at the moment. If other people don't like it (my students, my colleagues, whatever) they have the option of not looking.

Trimming everything to an even length and shaving a neckline and cheekline is making the mix 'n' match stubble almost tolerable.  Thinking about beard dye, though. I know hair dye is nasty toxic ->-bleeped-<-e, so maybe not Just For Men or other drugstore brands. Is there such a thing as natural dye for men's facial hair like the henna women use for their hair? 

Yeah, there are natural dyes you can get. But having tried a few of them - I can honestly say that they're crap. One made no change whatsoever, one lasted about two days, and the other one tinged my hair a kind of greenish/gray. So I use the long-lasting chemical stuff that actually works.