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Meta: Susan Stanton's lonely transformation

Started by Natasha, December 30, 2007, 10:49:48 AM

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LostInTime

Yes, she was well to do and got outed against her will and had the limelight fall on her. Boo hoo. Her statements only prove what others charged her with when this all happened and that is that she lacked any real character. The spotlight has merely allowed her flaws to be more evident.  She is entitled to her opinion and we are entitled to call her on it and let the rest of the world that we do not agree with her very narrow and bigoted views.

Oh and she was right about the lawsuit. I was advised against mine for similar reasons, it would have been impossible to gain employment afterwards.
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Purple Pimp

I agree; as a trans family, we all know how hard transition is, but that doesn't exactly give one a free pass.  Like any stigmatized group, some people feel the need to distance themselves from people who look extra-stigmatized.  Just like a light skinned black person hating on darker-skinned community members, she has taken the leap and publicly denounced people with less passing privilege than herself.  Maybe she feels she needs to do that for her own survival, but it's NOT acceptable.

Lia
First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you would do. -- Epictetus
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Sandy

Not to put too fine a point on it, folks, but can we stop with the Stanton bashing?

I'm not excusing her for her public opinions nor am I in favor of all she says or does.

BUT!  She is one of us!  She is a woman with a transsexual condition like myself and so many of us.  We are hard pressed right now to find allies and friend in the, now segmented, LGB & T community.  We should not be turning on our own sisters or brothers just because they have a differing opinion than others of us!

Get a grip ladies, PLEASE!

-Sandy
Out of the darkness, into the light.
Following my bliss.
I am complete...
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karmatic1110

Quote from: Kassandra on January 03, 2008, 10:44:08 AM
Not to put too fine a point on it, folks, but can we stop with the Stanton bashing?

I'm not excusing her for her public opinions nor am I in favor of all she says or does.

BUT!  She is one of us!  She is a woman with a transsexual condition like myself and so many of us.  We are hard pressed right now to find allies and friend in the, now segmented, LGB & T community.  We should not be turning on our own sisters or brothers just because they have a differing opinion than others of us!

Get a grip ladies, PLEASE!

-Sandy


She is not one of us.  She has explicitly stated that she is different than us and referred to the community as a bunch of men in dresses.  She has been very damaging recently to the community she is so eager to ship us off and frankly I am not going to pity her.  She is completely responsible for her actions and I don't think I could blindly support someone just because they are TS if I dislike the individual. 

If she publicly apologized for her remarks then MAYBE I could forgive, but frankly at this point she hasn't earned it.

Charlotte

Gina_Taylor

"I have never written to the Times before, but here goes. I understand only too well Susan's plight. First, she states that she has no friends. Being Trans is not a choice, but not having friends is. Most of the Trans people I know have lots of close and trusted friends, because they want to. I have personally shown up at nearly every event in Pinellas County where she has spoken, and have spoken out to the City Commission against firing her. She has been invited more than once to become a part of the local trans community, and has always refused.

Second, she states that she is not comfortable around other transgendered people because they appear as men in dresses. Who has she been hanging around with? Most of the Trans women I know do NOT appear as men in dresses. Maybe she's not comfortable with herself, either.

Third, she said she'd end it all if she can't work as a City Manager again. I call that a cop out. I lost a whole career coming out, and I went back to school and got another one, learning to live on a fourth of what I used to make in the meantime. I say, "Get tough, girl".

And fourth, Susan thinks we're not ready for equal rights. How else are we supposed to prove ourselves? Susan may be in the limelight now, but I think it is time for it to stop. She truly does NOT represent the Trans community. I welcome her comments; I would really like to know her agenda."

I think that Annie Social has made some very good points here. But really, I was just reading a section about Susan Stanton, where she had commented about the fact that she had been approached by the press and had been asked if he was thinking about changing his sex and he (impulsively) said "YES". Now Steve could have stopped a lot of things from going into effect if he had simply siad "NO" . By doing that it would have given him more time to play with and things wouldn't ahve been so tough on him. But because of his impulsiveness to say YES everything just got sped up and now he's living a miserable life with no job and no friends.

Gina 
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NicholeW.

Quote from: Kassandra on January 03, 2008, 10:44:08 AM
Not to put too fine a point on it, folks, but can we stop with the Stanton bashing?

I'm not excusing her for her public opinions nor am I in favor of all she says or does.

BUT!  She is one of us!  She is a woman with a transsexual condition like myself and so many of us.  We are hard pressed right now to find allies and friend in the, now segmented, LGB & T community.  We should not be turning on our own sisters or brothers just because they have a differing opinion than others of us!

Get a grip ladies, PLEASE!

-Sandy

I absolutely agree, Sandy. That "We should not be turning on our own sisters or brothers just because they have a differing opinion than others of us!"

And, to be very honest, what Susan Stanton says and doesn't say does not affect my life in a direct way. I imagine she didn't have me in mind when she said those things.

The difficulty with public statements by public persons is that they are seen and heard by way more people than 'just us." If she were here on this board I would say she has a right to say what she thinks, as long as she thinks before she says it where others can read it.

There is always some limitation to 'free speech.' We all like to declare that we are "honestly speaking," but there are points where we leave honesty in the main to be honestly peevish and even derogatory. And those are the times we need to think before we say something that is going to be terribly hurtful to others we know are reading/listening.

O, I get angry too, and do not always take into myself a consideration for others who might be hurt by what I do say or write. I do say things occasionally I absolutely KNOW are going to hurt someone else. And I mean to do it because I am angry or spiteful with them or because i am simply frustrated at being badgered myself. I imagine we all do that.

So, in some ways I do understand the 'why' of why she might have said the things she did say. But, if I 'go-off' at some public forum and lambast an entire group of people in my frustration I would expect to not only be 'called' on it, but to have them retaliate in kind toward me.

That, Susan is TS I have no doubt. That she is a public figure is beyond argument. But with the public figure also comes public accountability. And she is being called to task not for making statements in private that might hurt me or you or other people she has no clue even exist. She is being called to task for making sweeping and hurtful statements about people who, just like herself, have no say in who and what we are. And she is doing so to reporters and interviewers who she absolutely KNOWS are going to publicize the remarks.

Again, her naivete in these matters calls her judgement into question. That she is going to be raised up as a 'leader' with naivete and callous disregard intact is more the pity. Just as the raising up of Quisling in Norway in the 1940s was a pity.

I understand saving oneself. It's a pretty natural part of being human. But to openly and meanly disregard the faces you are walking over as you 'save yourself' is not the way to win 'support' from those you are trying to walk over.

From her remarks one suddenly gets the impression that she is saying "I am not one of THOSE people." Or "I am not a ->-bleeped-<-." Well, it's fine with me she thinks that way, if she does. For her to have her opinions is not the question.

For TSes to have opinions about her is something she has invited. Now, she, and we, need to live with that. I think we misplace our senses of who owes or acknowledges whom in this instance. She has sown the wind, that the whirlwind rises out of the earth before her should not surprise anyone at all. Nor should the whirlwind be condemned. THAT she has brought about herself.

Nichole

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Lisbeth

Quote from: Susan on January 02, 2008, 09:30:52 AM
I know Natasha didn't post that article so my comments are not directed at her, but at people like Kelli Busey the writer. Look people education is the key with people like Susan Stanton rather than spraying venom. Don't bash, don't slam, just explain, it will work much better in the long run. As we educate Susan, we can also advance the progress of educating the American public.
Nevertheless, I understand the anger.

The best advice I can give is, "Don't get angry; get organized."

Quote from: Kate on January 02, 2008, 10:35:43 AM
What do you think happened to her?

For awhile there, she was THE figurehead for TS Rights and all, speaking everywhere, doing interviews and shows, trying to point out that we're just ordinary people.

Now all the sudden she's given up on everything, thinks she's special and different than the "men in dresses" she met, and so on.

Why the sudden total turn-around?

~Kate~
Not a turn-around.  I heard disquieting rumors about her from the beginning.

Quote from: Kate on January 02, 2008, 01:15:31 PM
Quote from: genovais on January 02, 2008, 12:55:51 PM
She clearly had a good lawsuit and could have made a major contribution to the community.

I think her reasoning was that she put her community (local, not TS) above her personal issues... and didn't want to cost the people any more time, publicity or money because of her. I thought that was rather noble of her.
Perhaps.  Or it could have been that there were other reasons for being fired that wouldn't have looked so good.
"Anyone who attempts to play the 'real transsexual' card should be summarily dismissed, as they are merely engaging in name calling rather than serious debate."
--Julia Serano

http://juliaserano.blogspot.com/2011/09/transsexual-versus-transgender.html
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