Hi all,
Sofia here. I would consider myself bigender or 69% girly love and 21% male. Maybe more femal and les male. But the male is always there. This may change as soon as I get hrt.

Quote from: SophiaBleu on March 10, 2016, 10:37:27 PM
Hi all,
Sofia here. I would consider myself bigender or 69% girly love and 21% male. Maybe more femal and les male. But the male is always there. This may change as soon as I get hrt.

Hey! I kinda know what you mean. I see myself as a 70/30 blend of femme and butch traits (femme dominant) but it is all trans woman. I have been seeing myself as more bigender recently too except I am sometimes agender, as in I feel no relationship to gender what so ever and then I will swing back to being very aware and thrilled with my femme butch trans womanhood. On my agender days I often downplay a lot of my more gendered presentation. Sometimes I play up a mix. I do get more stares on those days but I feel more confident in it so it doesn't matter as much. I like being a question mark some of the time. But it is super nice when straight men find me hot too!

Hi, new people and anyone else who's still around.

While I'm not the 'member from way back' who inspired this thread, I'm still someone who used to be active but has been on a sabbatical for, let's see, five years or so. So, as an introduction / status update, I'm 51, live in northern Europe and have progressed to the point where I've got a male name on my office door, a female one on my work e-mail address, and both on my ID card. Strangers tend to see me more as a woman than as a man these days, which is fine with me even if it isn't the whole truth.

And now let's see if this will be a fly-by update or if I'm here to stay.

I am very happy to be included in the non binary gender part of the world.  My narrative followed a different path than what i once thought was required for transgender membership and stalled my self acceptance for years. 

While I was one who did feel I was a girl from an early age I also coped and adapted to a reality i then felt was unalterable.  Having previously lived 60 years as some kind of boy and man meant years of socialization in a gender role that never fit.  My dysphoria was progressive enough and meeting another non binary trans person helped rock my world of excuses and denial.  This is just one reason I consider our visibility with diverse stories of being trans so important for those coming next.  One size does not fit all!

I gradually have become more comfortable calling myself a trans woman and went thru times of being androgynous and gender queer--all valid for the time.  Woman is an inclusive term for me and I arrived here with my life experience and memories intact.  I am kind of a hybrid and delighted to have allowed myself the freedoms to live the way I feel best.

What works for you is best decided by you who pays the price of admission.  

Someone here brought up phantom limbs for their missing parts-- I really identify with that. I'm female bodied, but the first time I put on a packer and saw that guy hanging out of my briefs, I felt like I was seeing my phantom male member.

Yes. It was so nice to exchange my phantom breasts for real ones. And having two sets of genitals is a bit weird, especially as the one that's physically there feels less real than the one that isn't. Adds to the NB feeling, though.

I always thought that was rather cool but never saw it in real life.

Genderfluidity/non-binary wasn't a thing when I started getting seriously into my trans side (I'd crossdressed since childhood and imagined myself as a girl frequently, but didn't peek out of the closet until my early twenties), back then all you could be was ->-bleeped-<- or transexual.  I realised quickly that I wasn't the latter - for me, it wasn't so much about rejecting my birth gender as not being limited by it.  I said at the time that had I been born a girl I'd probably have dressed as a boy and when someone at a trans night sarcastically called me a "tomboy ->-bleeped-<-" I thought that fitted me perfectly.   I took to wearing skirts with male outfits through most of my twenties, it pretty much became my look, though I went full femme for performance purposes (amongst other things, I did a drag magic act) or if the mood just took me. 

After a while, genderf**** started appearing as a term, but I wasn't happy with such a crude term and I didn't want people getting the idea it was all about shock.  Genderqueer was slightly better, but it's only more recently that I've found genderfluid as my proper designation.  I'm pretty flexible about pronouns (and bathrooms for that matter), generally using whatever is most comfortable for the people I'm with, so long as there's no malice on their part.  I'd rather meet people halfway to promote positive acceptance than risk alienating them further by getting bent out of shape. 

Quote from: suzifrommd on September 17, 2015, 08:14:08 PM


I'm Suzi, who lived for 50 years obliviously as a man never dreaming I'd have gender issues. I now live full-time as a woman, but I don't really see myself as female, or not completely. My true gender is kind of a genderfluid mix of feeling female, male, agender, or something else entirely.

Even though I am not full time so to speak I kind of feel like that too.

Hi all! As a kid I was always a tomboy, but even though I tried to visit that again in my early 20s, most of my life I've struggled to fit in the female only box. In the last few months I've stepped out of that box, and packed up my dresses and jewelry. At first I thought I knew exactly where I was landing, but as time goes on I'm discovering it's not as simple as originally planned. I'm finding a lot of grey areas and I'm both nervous and excited about rediscovering where I fall in these new experiences.

I wear men's clothes, and want to look good in them, but I don't have a need to change my body. I feel like I've been misrepresenting myself for a couple of decades. Now I have to be honest with myself about what I need, and what I want in order to be happy. It's nice to meet everyone here, and to learn about all of your different journeys. (And if they have been painful, I hope you find peace very soon.)

L~

Hi Lizard,

I'm mom to a trans girl, who is only on HRT and after 2.5 years hasn't made any move to get her name or marker changed. She still tells us she's a girl and wants her chosen name used. But she's definitely stuck in non-binary world.
Ironically,  it was her coming out that made me aware of my identity as more NB than female.
I have a male name, and have frequently been 'accused' of being a 'dyke'. I only wear dresses for special occasions .
I kind of like shocking people by reinforcing that although I'm not physically male, nor do I  want to be, I am definitely not the average image of a woman. I have worked in a male-dominated profession for about 30 years.
So, I take pride in not being binary. I challenge all policies being written in my company to be gender neutral. I'm currently trying to neutralize sexist grooming standards. It has only been 1 year since my company's health insurance became trans* inclusive.
I campaign for equality, but do stand apart. It kind of deflates me that I'm not as 'unique ' as I have been in the past.
At the same time, I feel less isolated. I call myself a woman, but happy to be past menopause 😉.  I'm happy to be a Mom, but prefer to be a nurturing AND strong parent. I work hard, but my physique is kind of weak and soft.
I'm non-binary, and proud. My kid is trans* and my husband is kinda confused.  😃
Life can be interesting and full of all kinds of beautiful people. I feel fortunate to be amongst some right here.

I just watched a vlog by a Canadian youth, 20 something and afab. They mentioned that if they had been amab they feel they still would have transitioned to the middle. I feel that way too! If I had been born more distinctly female I feel certain that I would have ended up on T.

Some of my most important role models in life are women who are masculine in some significant way. I don't always understand gender. Male and female will always seem foreign to me. But I do think I understand masculine and feminine, they ebbe and flow through me.

Hello. I'm Jesse, and I am a teenage femandrogyne. I've been exploring my sexuality for some time now and I feel that that's what suits me best, despite that I am male biologically.

Quote from: Xyun on April 11, 2016, 08:30:05 PM
Hello. I'm Jesse, and I am a teenage femandrogyne. I've been exploring my sexuality for some time now and I feel that that's what suits me best, despite that I am male biologically.

Welcome!

Quote from: Xyun on April 11, 2016, 08:30:05 PM
Hello. I'm Jesse, and I am a teenage femandrogyne. I've been exploring my sexuality for some time now and I feel that that's what suits me best, despite that I am male biologically.

Hi Jesse. Welcome to Susan's. 

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Quote from: bunnymom on April 03, 2016, 07:48:23 PM
Hi Lizard,

I'm mom to a trans girl, who is only on HRT and after 2.5 years hasn't made any move to get her name or marker changed. She still tells us she's a girl and wants her chosen name used. But she's definitely stuck in non-binary world.
Ironically,  it was her coming out that made me aware of my identity as more NB than female.
I have a male name, and have frequently been 'accused' of being a 'dyke'. I only wear dresses for special occasions .
I kind of like shocking people by reinforcing that although I'm not physically male, nor do I  want to be, I am definitely not the average image of a woman. I have worked in a male-dominated profession for about 30 years.
So, I take pride in not being binary. I challenge all policies being written in my company to be gender neutral. I'm currently trying to neutralize sexist grooming standards. It has only been 1 year since my company's health insurance became trans* inclusive.
I campaign for equality, but do stand apart. It kind of deflates me that I'm not as 'unique ' as I have been in the past.
At the same time, I feel less isolated. I call myself a woman, but happy to be past menopause 😉.  I'm happy to be a Mom, but prefer to be a nurturing AND strong parent. I work hard, but my physique is kind of weak and soft.
I'm non-binary, and proud. My kid is trans* and my husband is kinda confused.  😃
Life can be interesting and full of all kinds of beautiful people. I feel fortunate to be amongst some right here.

Hi bunnymom! Would you say that your daughter inspired you, or brought it out in you? This sounds like an interesting and wonderful dynamic! And kudos to you for doing so much work for equality!

I'm not past menopause, but I am loving Mirena! Twin boys were enough for me. LOL!
L~

Hi! I was directed here by a mod on my basic intro post, so I thought I'd say hello. 

My name is Rinn, I'm 22, and nonbinary androgyne. I feel the same way as some people have mentioned above, that if I'd been assigned differently, I still would've transitioned to center. I figured I was nonbinary when I was 16-17... Looking back, it should've been more obvious. I used to pretend-shave my face with my dad even when I was clamoring to wear dresses, which I wore with my dinosaur boy-underwear.

QuoteI was clamoring to wear dresses, which I wore with my dinosaur boy-underwear.

That's like poetry

I'm Sage, a gender enigma who was AFAB, transitioned to male, and then ended up not feeling completely in line with any gender I encountered along the way. Socially I live as male for the most part and I'm pretty okay with that, but on the inside/with friends/with some family/with my partner I'm agender-aligned or at the very least a """""man""""" with like fifteen sarcastic quotation marks around it.

Quote from: spentgladiator on May 10, 2016, 12:53:02 AM
I'm Sage, a gender enigma who was AFAB, transitioned to male, and then ended up not feeling completely in line with any gender I encountered along the way. Socially I live as male for the most part and I'm pretty okay with that, but on the inside/with friends/with some family/with my partner I'm agender-aligned or at the very least a """""man""""" with like fifteen sarcastic quotation marks around it.

Hi Sage, great to meet you.

I have a somewhat similar experience. I transitioned MtF and even got bottom surgery, all of which for the most part I'm happy with, but on the inside I don't feel like I'm really either gender most of the time.