There are many ways to become a teacher. I spent the last 20 years as a part time corporate trainer.  Here is an invaluable web site provided by MIT, HARVARD, Stanford and another 50 colleges. All courses are on line and all are based on in classroom curriculum. These are undergraduate and graduate courses.  You can earn certification for most.  The website is http://ocw.mit.edu/courses/  and I noticed they had courses on Womens and Gender studies. Why not become an expert at your passion? You are in control. No one else.  When the top colleges want to give you free stuff it is in your interest to investigate.  MAS.712   How to Learn (Almost) Anything   

Are the courses free and if I do enough will I get an actual degree??

Not very long ago I was in a position where I probably would've been dead if it wasn't for good friendships (From susans) and people who decided to stick with me even though I didn't think there was anybody left. Part of it was because I was a very lonely person in another part of it was because I was transgender and I didn't know how to deal with anything. I still feel lonely and sometimes I still feel like I am a very misunderstood person I still "sometimes" feel like testosterone is a long ways away and like nobody cares. (Not saying your experiences are like mine exactly, but its just a example) Truth be told that is just our minds in a breakdown people do care! about you! and people love you even if they don't necessarily always understand it takes a long time for people to get it.
Some never will, but in the end a lot of people who you don't expect end up caring, even if there on the other end of the computer. The people who helped me was on the other end if it wasn't for them I don't know how it would have ended. So maybe it feels horrible, but don't let it be the end. Because even these people far away from you care and they're doing all they can to give you the support you need that's why places like this exist. Keep walking and keep looking forward please because no matter who you are life is worth it even when it seems like the future is invisible. Remember it isn't, life it is worth it.

 

I just wish more can be done besides getting a job or a better education.

At age 13 my transition was impossible. At age 30 I had surgery finishing the process. The process is much easer today and with what I know and in todays climate, the process could be done in two years. To transition is a big commitment both towards constructing a new life and toward the process of transitioning. Few if any get it handed to them even if they are young with supporting parents and all the money/insurance that is needed.

It's up to you to decide what your goals are and make every effort to reach them. If you do so and don't quit, you will reach your goal. Maybe not in the time frame you desire but some day. Break the problem into small bits. Currently your main goal should be a job. If you need an education for that, work towards that goal. Once you can keep and hold the job, you move on to the transition and the many tasks involved in that. It's far from impossible and many have done it.

You need to take that attitude that there is nothing you can't do. I have always had that attitude and sometimes it takes longer than expected but I don't give up until I have finished what I started.

Is there a way to get by without a job?? At this point I think it'll better if I didn't worry about trying to get a job it's taking a bad toll.

First off - please don't off yourself. I've lost too many friends and people I know who have - and I've been at the lowest point of my life where I thought that myself. It does get better - but YOU need to start the ball rolling. First off, move away from Tennessee - do what I did - come to Washington State. It's beautiful, people are so nice, kind, welcoming, and oh yeah - you can get a job at McDonalds for $15 bucks an hour. Do what you can and get over here!

Second - male or female - whatever you identify with - find peace within yourself. You are worthy of friendship, acceptance, and respect. If you can't find it with your current family or friends - move somewhere else where you can. I found when I moved from Texas, it was like starting over from scratch. A new me. I did that 13 years ago and it was the best decision I ever made. Clark College is paying for me to go to school - and I'm studying for an AA in Health Informatics which pays starting at $30 to $50 an hour! So yes - you can go to school, for free - granted you maintain a C, and there are better places out there.

Don't give up. I'm proof there are better places in this country.

Jessica

Quote from: Jessica_W on April 02, 2016, 07:17:21 PM
First off - please don't off yourself. I've lost too many friends and people I know who have - and I've been at the lowest point of my life where I thought that myself. It does get better - but YOU need to start the ball rolling. First off, move away from Tennessee - do what I did - come to Washington State. It's beautiful, people are so nice, kind, welcoming, and oh yeah - you can get a job at McDonalds for $15 bucks an hour. Do what you can and get over here!

Second - male or female - whatever you identify with - find peace within yourself. You are worthy of friendship, acceptance, and respect. If you can't find it with your current family or friends - move somewhere else where you can. I found when I moved from Texas, it was like starting over from scratch. A new me. I did that 13 years ago and it was the best decision I ever made. Clark College is paying for me to go to school - and I'm studying for an AA in Health Informatics which pays starting at $30 to $50 an hour! So yes - you can go to school, for free - granted you maintain a C, and there are better places out there.

Don't give up. I'm proof there are better places in this country.

Jessica

If I where to move to Washington would I be eligible for Medicaid there and will it be easy to get financial if I need it??

I don't know I have my doubts I could afford to live in Washington State.  The costs of living there looks astronomical even with a $15 an hour job.

Something to think about. Lets say that somehow you get through the next couple of years and complete your transition. What do you want to do with the rest of your life? The bills will keep coming in and it will be desirable to eat and have a roof over your head. My before life left me able to support myself and save money after surgery doing a job that I enjoyed. What will you do for a living?

sorry, I'm a little confused as to way you don't want to work. are you physically disabled or mentally disabled. If your physically disabled or mentally disabled or both and it can be verified by a doctor  and or therapist you wouldn't have too much of a problem getting SSI. or Medicare.

Quote from: Dena on April 02, 2016, 08:47:56 PM
What do you want to do with the rest of your life? The bills will keep coming in and it will be desirable to eat and have a roof over your head. My before life left me able to support myself and save money after surgery doing a job that I enjoyed. What will you do for a living?

Honestly I don't know. In the time I graduated high school and been doing college classes and the limbo in between I haven't got a clue what I want to do and frankly what I could do in a job.  The two jobs that I did have taught me a couple things: Having a good attitude and work ethic doesn't make up for incompetence and I can't handle fast paced work evidently. I couldn't tell how many job interviews I blew due to lacking skills the employer was seeking or because I scored poorly on a test required for the job. I've been trying to be good at something but in the end I lack the talent most jobs are seeking.  I'm only good at one thing: Map Reading and last I check there isn't a market for that unfortunately otherwise I would apply right sway.

Quote from: stephaniec on April 02, 2016, 08:53:22 PM
sorry, I'm a little confused as to way you don't want to work. are you physically disabled or mentally disabled. If your physically disabled or mentally disabled or both and it can be verified by a doctor  and or therapist you wouldn't have too much of a problem getting SSI. or Medicare.

I do not have a physical or mental disability but just for the sake of being honest I do have a documented learning disability since I was like in 2nd grade and have been in special education till I graduated high school. And to answer the other part I do admit, after endless job searching for almost a year since my last job, I am wanting to give up as stupid as that is. For everytime I apply for a job and get no phone call or a notification saying I don't qualify what little hope I have dies and just makes me think it be better if I just stopped looking/applying and don't work all together. I know it's stupid of me to do that but the way things are going what more can I do??

Hello Emily. As a fellow person who has suffered from depression, I sympathise with you.
I suffer from dysthymia (long term chronic depression) for a host of reasons and have also suffered from clinical depression in the past. I have lived with depression for at least 16 years of my life (noting that I'm 31 now) and first attempted suicide at 10.

I'm new to the forum so I might not be the best person to talk to in regards to the problem you face, but I would like to think that I at least understand what it is like to suffer from despair and depression... And how to live with it and survive despite it.

Remember that as long as you are still alive, anything is possible. This means that that as long as you dare to dream, dare to do something about it, one day, you can turn your situation around and attain what you want.

Making a rough guess that you are around 21, I'm certain that you hate being told that you are still young. I know that I did. Haha... And at 31, I still hear it being said to me.
The truth however is that at 21, your life is only just truly beginning.
At your age, for no reason other than being born male, I was forced to serve two years of compulsory military service during which I greatly suffered and sustained a list of injuries. I even suffered from clinical depression and unknowingly nearly threw myself off a building in a bid to get to the first floor... And after climbing halfway over the ledge did I suddenly realise what I was doing. Both of us have been dealt a bad hand by fate and the governments that oversee us.

The thing is, fate is what you make of it. Do not let it govern your life. Dare to dream. Dare to realise that as long as there is a tomorrow, you can overcome your circumstances. Even if it means you have to start off by crawling towards your goals, little by little, you will find that things can get better and better.

But for now, don't look at all your future problems at one go; that will stress you out. If you try to plan too far ahead, you will find yourself trying to micromanage each problem. Give yourself vague future goals, then proceed to deal with each day by each day. Bid your time if you have to. Patience and waiting for the right opportunity and timing helps a lot. If it is possible to come to a compromise with your family, my advice is for you to do so... For now. Once you are fully financially independent, you will be able to do as you wish. Patience and timing.
Once they no longer have financially control over you and you have full independence, how can they stop you?

Work hard at your degree. If you feel that your government doesn't do enough for you as I have, then look for opportunities overseas. Globalisation means that if you have a degree, you can always try to find work overseas. But as I said, one step at a time. Don't try to run while looking too far ahead. Tripping and falling (into depression) hurts after all.

Exercise. I'm not saying to hit the gym or something but... I'm certain you will continue to face anguish until you are able to start on therapy. Exercise helps to counter stress hormones and combats depression. Remember as I said, as long as you are alive, there is hope.

Finally, love yourself and know that holding on to your dream will give you greater happiness in the future. *hug*

One of the reasons I have hated to lose a job is because I need to send out hundreds of resumes to find a job where they want my skills. Once I find that job, I am like gold to them as I am able to do whatever they need. Many people are in the same boat that I am in and when a company has an opening, often they have a pile of resumes to select from to fill an opening. Job hunting isn't easy and the only way to find a job is by not giving up. I would suggest you spend as much time as possible figuring out what you can do. If your school has a career consoler, spend some time and take any test they might have to discover your abilities and likes. I sort of stumbled into computer programming but it turned out to be something I loved for over 40 years.

Hey Emily... (this will be long but bare with me)

I can see myself in what you describe, I know what you mean. I know how you feel, really. Been there.

I think your writing is pretty good.

Now really. You might have many more skills than you think.

You can think. Obviously...

The explanation of your situation seems well structured. I'm not a native English speaker but... I can see... the ideas are well presented and structured

Hey I know how you feel 'cause I've been like that all my life: no skills, life too fast paced everywhere.

Gender dysphoria too, but I didn't exactly know... It was way before Internet so how to know... I mean I can't even remember how we got information back then. You had to know someone who knew someone... (I mean for everything), or read, read, read...

So no information available, transitionning was like outer space back then, some weirdos did it, we heard... Someone knew someone who knew someone... It was not even possible for me to imagine that I could go this way, I mean I knew it existed, I knew I could but... socially? Socially unthinkable then, so...

I felt so bad in that body but that's the one I had...

So I resigned to forget about any idea that I would maybe actually be a woman and tried very hard to be a man.

And no skills. Too slow. Not very enthusiastic... never. Depressed (or perceived as such). I smoked pot (I still do)

I went to pick apples out west in BC, I was 19... cool times...

I sucked at picking apples...

other pickers even laughed at me (well everyone always laughed at me everywhere anyways, I dunno, I'm clumsy, you know...)

Managed to find a desperate farmer, finished the season with a little money then headed North to see my brother whom I had not seen for 7-8 years (I'm from the East of Canada.)

He got me a job as a taxi driver in his small BC town. But you know, I sucked at that too, I got my taxi in the ditch a few times and... bye-bye. Meanwhile my brother had moved away, so I went back East. What did I do then?

No skills, too slow...

I managed to find a job delivering pizza. I did that and other deliveries for, what 3-4 years, then went back to college (I had quit high school at 16, so I went to adult school and...)

My post was getting too long, I cut here and try to  summarize and get to a point (I'm not that well structured haha, chaos sometimes rules my head).

yes, I was a total drop out but ended up in university at 28 and loved it.

I'm a thinker, not a doer.

University is the place for thinkers, I was very well there, I stayed 6 years, almost had a masters.

And yeah, I couldn't achieve whatever in high school, like really nothing appeared almost like a dumbhead, which I was not. There was a reason...

that's one thing I wanted to tell you, maybe you're a thinker, not a doer, and that's why you think you have no skills (which is untrue since you can think and write, and hey, I didn't know how to write that well until I got to U. and earned a living writing (somewhat) afterwards).

the other thing  I wanted to tell you is that
Things turned around for me when I understood why I was like that. It's like... somewhat a condition, you know, or many conditions twisted together and linked, being trans being one of them. I claim they are linked and related, I will demonstrate how, just give me a little more time to study and think. There are many conditions... depression is not the cause, it's the consequence of...

It's been a few years all the pieces got together, I wish I would have known that when I was 20, the perception of things, of life, is different when you know why.

I invite you to read Wikipedia and other relevant sites, and books, get to the library and search for yourself, find yourself. Get information it's all there.

Get guidelines, please find a good psychologist ASAP, another one then... oh another one (psychology is far from being a firm domain, search, try...).

The best person to know about yourself is yourself but you're young and don't have all the information so you need guidelines, start somewhere... why am I like that? There has to be a reason. There is a reason Emily. Gender dysphoria doesn't explain everything and HRT isn't the solution to all your problems. It could be, but if you have unsolved hidden parts of the reason you're like that, chances are very good you will hit another wall. Transitionning can actually worsen things up you know, for jobs and other social stuff...

If you build on soft soil...

You need guidelines, seek help, but remember you know best about you. Only you. You have to use your intelligence to gather all information from external sources and mixed that up with your internal information. What do you feel? How is this maybe related to how I feel?...

Let time work.

I know you're in your early twenties, you want everything now. I was like that too, I remember. I'm still like that. I'm still 20 years old. But now I know... decades after. Time does erode mountains (of troubles...).

It took me a long time for I had no clue... But you're into a good start, you know your trans, that's one thing. But why the rest, too fast, everything is too fast, why? Sounds like me. I have a good clue. You need to find out.

Also I realized the environment we're in is major. It took me so long to realize that...

You are what your environment makes you. They see you unskilled, so you see yourself unskilled. Listen, the greatest move I made in my life was to leave home town and move to the big city where life is very different. Never going back. You can be slow, weird, trans, whatever in a big city. Or out West as suggested to you earlier. To Canada where you get your meds for almost free (yes you could... become canadian).

Somewhere else.

The world is yours. Don't just stay there, you know... I don't know Tennessee ... maybe you'd be different if you were elswhere, idk... maybe, don't you think? If you're ready to transition, are you ready to leave everything behind and move away? Which is more difficult, you think?

Transitionning is not something you can buy at the store or an app. It's a process. Just like life, Emily. A process. Takes time. You have to live life, and that's Time.

Take your life into your own hands, no one else will do it for you, just like no one, no doctor, no psychologist nor psychiatrist will give you an all wrapped solution. The truth is here and there and within you, you have to grasp the pieces.

Time... (think, that's what we have, us humans, that's our skill)

and oh I forgot to say Emily, I care and worry about you 

Quote from: EmilyRyan on April 01, 2016, 07:35:52 PM
How do I become skilled to get a job??

Something I noticed about your work history...you get let go even though you have a good work ethic, which is probably the #1 complaint employers have about young workers. They don't just let people go without reason. And McDonald's isn't usually picky about who they hire.

Did they tell you why?

Quote from: EmilyRyan on April 02, 2016, 08:13:19 PM
I don't know I have my doubts I could afford to live in Washington State.  The costs of living there looks astronomical even with a $15 an hour job.

Unless you are buying a house, Washington is like anywhere else except the citizens are mostly educated. With Boeing and the tech companies not everyone has to work at Mc Donalds. There is no income tax in Washington. 
As to the MIT courses, yes they are free. Yes you can get certified completion. No you cannot get credits. So in that regard the are like Devry, ITT and UOP. You might need to learn how to put a resume together. But once you get into a interview situation where the MIT information has helped you walk the walk. For example I have taken the Six Sigma and TPS courses and I have just as much knowledge as anyone who has actually taken classes at MIT. Yes I had to earn my black belt but it was a whole lot easier with this information behind me.  It's up to you to convey your expertise. Nobody can do that for you. When I hear someone say something is too hard, my lazy meter starts going off. If you want it bad enough, nothing will stop you.

Quote from: EmilyRyan on April 02, 2016, 09:30:04 PM
Honestly I don't know. In the time I graduated high school and been doing college classes and the limbo in between I haven't got a clue what I want to do and frankly what I could do in a job.  The two jobs that I did have taught me a couple things: Having a good attitude and work ethic doesn't make up for incompetence and I can't handle fast paced work evidently. I couldn't tell how many job interviews I blew due to lacking skills the employer was seeking or because I scored poorly on a test required for the job. I've been trying to be good at something but in the end I lack the talent most jobs are seeking.  I'm only good at one thing: Map Reading and last I check there isn't a market for that unfortunately otherwise I would apply right sway.
I do not have a physical or mental disability but just for the sake of being honest I do have a documented learning disability since I was like in 2nd grade and have been in special education till I graduated high school. And to answer the other part I do admit, after endless job searching for almost a year since my last job, I am wanting to give up as stupid as that is. For everytime I apply for a job and get no phone call or a notification saying I don't qualify what little hope I have dies and just makes me think it be better if I just stopped looking/applying and don't work all together. I know it's stupid of me to do that but the way things are going what more can I do??

I lost my job of twenty years because I got sick and over 50. It took over 2000 applications and resumes but I finally got hired by Boeing where I put in another 10 years as a Systems SME. The week I got the job is the same week I had exhausted my pension and I had to borrow money for the first time ever to get housing to start the job. Boeing eventually paid for my move. One more benefit was that Boeing and other large companies will pay for you to complete your education in any subject you choose. Home Depot where my daughter works has a paid education component online. Want an accredited course? Try WGU.edu   Its  online, Has a flat rate of $6000 per year. And they offer teaching education.

Quote from: DawnOday on April 03, 2016, 09:46:50 AM
Unless you are buying a house, Washington is like anywhere else except the citizens are mostly educated. With Boeing and the tech companies not everyone has to work at Mc Donalds. There is no income tax in Washington. 
As to the MIT courses, yes they are free. Yes you can get certified completion. No you cannot get credits. So in that regard the are like Devry, ITT and UOP. You might need to learn how to put a resume together. But once you get into a interview situation where the MIT information has helped you walk the walk. For example I have taken the Six Sigma and TPS courses and I have just as much knowledge as anyone who has actually taken classes at MIT. Yes I had to earn my black belt but it was a whole lot easier with this information behind me.  It's up to you to convey your expertise. Nobody can do that for you. When I hear someone say something is too hard, my lazy meter starts going off. If you want it bad enough, nothing will stop you.

I want to thank Silrevia, Soli, and others for the uplifting comments ya are a reminder of why I joined here 

Quote from: Beth Andrea on April 03, 2016, 04:24:17 AM
Something I noticed about your work history...you get let go even though you have a good work ethic, which is probably the #1 complaint employers have about young workers. They don't just let people go without reason. And McDonald's isn't usually picky about who they hire.

Did they tell you why?

The first job I had was working as a donations attendant for Goodwill. It started off good then it got to where I couldn't keep up with the number of people coming to drop off donations and after six months the corporate head that watches over the store and the managers finally got fed up with me not being able to keep up and told the store manager to fire me.  Fast forward to summer of last year I got a job at Walmart working in the back unloading trucks.  My job was to pick up boxes and place them on pallets sounds simple right I mean how could I possibly screw up there?? Unfortunately management considered me too slow for that job because I was always having to read the signs and labels constantly so I wouldn't be putting stuff on the wrong pallets.  Within two months of that job I was suddenly let go but the management there felt sorry for me enough to make it look like I just quit instead of having a termination.

And Tennessee is a so-called right to work state meaning that employers can also fire people without reason like I can be fired for being a brunette and do nothing about it.

Quote from: DawnOday on April 03, 2016, 10:06:09 AM
I lost my job of twenty years because I got sick and over 50. It took over 2000 applications and resumes but I finally got hired by Boeing where I put in another 10 years as a Systems SME. The week I got the job is the same week I had exhausted my pension and I had to borrow money for the first time ever to get housing to start the job. Boeing eventually paid for my move. One more benefit was that Boeing and other large companies will pay for you to complete your education in any subject you choose. Home Depot where my daughter works has a paid education component online. Want an accredited course? Try WGU.edu   Its  online, Has a flat rate of $6000 per year. And they offer teaching education.

I would love to be able to work for Boeing, considering I do love aircraft with a passion but don't they only hire STEM majors??