It's so strange, going from long periods of waiting and no progress to EVERYTHING HAPPENING ALL AT ONCE! I'm in a completely different place than I was when I was last active here. Literally, physically, emotionally, every possible way.

I came out at work. Finally. So I guess that makes me full time, at last. It took a month of bothering but they even changed my first name in the system to my preferred name. However, the HR person strongly "suggested" I not use the men's room until I "look more masculine" meaning I have facial hair? She's never actually seen me and works in another state. But that's a fight for another day. I'm just happy to be called Colin at work.

I finally made an appointment to see a doctor about getting T. After some research, I found Dr. Ben Ly (in the Legacy Northwest clinic). And he is flat out amazing. I've been afraid to go to doctors because I've never been treated well, and he was so awesome I'm actually looking forward to him. Anyone in the Portland area, I strongly suggest him.

That was yesterday.

I already have a vial of T sitting in my bathroom. He was able to process all my tests and get my prescription to me that fast. He put me on a half dose. My head is kind of spinning. I was expecting a long wait to mentally prepare.

I'm a little bit scared. I've never given myself injections before. I need to remember this isn't like stabbing yourself with a safety pin or something. I'm going to take my first shot in the morning. I didn't want to rush it when I got home from work.

I start T tomorrow. I don't think that's quite sunk in just yet.

Welcome my brother to your new life.

Enjoy!

Congrats on getting a good doc! Definitely take the time to get it right on your injection--it's normal to be nervous. Lots of good stuff coming your way for sure.

Congratulations

Congrats!

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The journey is amazing I'm sooo happy for you brotha!!!!!

Congratulations!  As someone who has stabbed themselves with safety pins before (when I was 14 that was how I pierced my ears and nose Heaven help me), I promise you that injections are a lot less painful! 

Enjoy! You will get used to injections. Just make yourself a little routine and it will be over in just a few minutes, and you can go back to your life. Happy to hear things have been going well for you!

Like FTMax said,  you'll establish a routine that will help you with shot jitters.  They are completely normal. 

Congratulations! I'm glad things have been going well!

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Congratulations! I think that's what everyone here would call progress. Well done.

As to the bathroom thing, no matter what that HR person thinks, you'll know it's time to switch when (a) you just feel too out of place in the W, or (b) your co-workers start giving you a hard time about it. Or both.

Thank you everyone!

Quote from: Tysilio on April 16, 2016, 04:49:05 PM
Congratulations! I think that's what everyone here would call progress. Well done.

As to the bathroom thing, no matter what that HR person thinks, you'll know it's time to switch when (a) you just feel too out of place in the W, or (b) your co-workers start giving you a hard time about it. Or both.

The thing right now is I'm not 100% comfortable in either. I get weird looks in both but no one has said anything. I'm in that weird, murky middle ground of too masculine to be feminine and too feminine to be masculine. Hopefully over the coming months that will shift a lot more toward the end I want.

Well if HR failed to define exactly what 'looking more masculine' means you could probably just do whatever you want

Quote from: Peep on April 16, 2016, 05:18:13 PM
Well if HR failed to define exactly what 'looking more masculine' means you could probably just do whatever you want

Oh, they did define it. Their definition, for some reason, is "having facial hair." The joke on my team is that now our manager has to use the women's room because he doesn't have any.

Okay. Work stuff aside. To make this officially progress type stuff, we need a baseline. A comparison of sorts. So here's my pre-T photo:



Currently at 285lbs. I've lost 38lbs since mid-October. Here's hoping that trend continues and soon I'll feel comfortable enough to ditch the hoodie for a photo.

I've seen cismen that look more like "girls" than you, which isn't the point anyways. If they know you identify as male they need to respect that by letting you in the male restroom. If they're scared that you might have issues have one of your supportive male coworkers go with you.

I've been on T for like 5 days so no noticeable changes but I've used the male restroom a few times and only had one problem. I could only really pass for a prepubescent boy and I guess that's why the man thought I was a girl was because we were in a pub. Other than that one time I've been fine.

Also congrats

The HR lady made a big deal about what's "legal" and I did a poor job of explaining Oregon laws about it (we're one of the most open, liberal states where it comes to bathroom laws). She's in California and misunderstood the law.

Soon I won't have to worry about it, tho. I have a feeling that the whole facial hair issue will be taken care of in short order. It's always been a problem for me. Thick, dark hairs on my chin and upper lip that until recently I obsessively plucked. The moment the hormones take hold...I should probably invest in an electric razor in the coming weeks. Both sides of my family have no problem growing thick beards.

And congrats on 5-days in!

Quote from: Tysilio on April 16, 2016, 04:49:05 PM
As to the bathroom thing, no matter what that HR person thinks, you'll know it's time to switch when (a) you just feel too out of place in the W, or (b) your co-workers start giving you a hard time about it. Or both.

I'm dreading this so much. Worked at the same place for 11 years (longest I've ever worked anywhere). I use the men's room super rarely. I don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable. I could use the single use rooms but the ones on my floor never seem as clean and comfortable as the big restrooms.

I don't know where that point will trigger. I think I will have to switch to men's in public once I get passable again (ah, misspent youth), but my coworkers know me so they've never kicked me out of the women's room. And I don't want to wait until they do because I'd feel really bad about it. (I care about what they think. Random bathroom policers in public? Get a life, lady.)

My city has a bathroom ordnance which is good because it looks like I'm going to be waiting a long time for those sideburns I've always wanted. 

So it seems the lady in question is working in our office for the week, and she invited me to stop by her office to say hello. I just may have to do that, so she can SEE me.

But ugh. This week is turning out to be....strange. So the day before my shot, I got smacked in my face with a wicked allergy attack. One that's only now fading. And 12 hours after I gave myself my shot I started my damn period. So it's been a constant guessing game of "which thing is making me feel like this?"

I feel for you having all these situations to work through.  I am in college and now use the men's all the time when out.  Here at school I go to a building where I don't have any classes and is unlikely that I will see anyone I know.  Just finished shark week so know the dysphoria of having there too.

So I started using the "Gender Neutral" bathroom at work. Which they still haven't changed the sign for. And there's no trash bin in the stall, which makes for incredibly awkward moments during shark week. Thankfully no one else was in there.

I have also now given myself my second shot. Last week was 20 minutes of "oh god I can't do this!" and today it took me longer to get the dosage into the syringe than it did to give myself the shot. So yay progress!