Thank you Moni. Very good idea. I have been writing quite a bit as well but have never thought to do it that way. It's not corny at all. Sounds very therapeutic. The appt went well. This councelor is not an actual gender specialist so she is going to get me some name of some she knows. She said in this subject I have probably already exhausted her ideas. She will continue to help me deal it's the divorce issues though. Thanks again!

Jenny

Jenny,
Stay positive, things will work out. It's a marathon not a sprint.
Moni

Moni, I tried your suggestion of he notes and she notes. Very interesting idea. I ended up acting like I was having a conversation with myself or even an argument. My male side would defend male hood and my female side would defend the feminine point of view and why I should transition. It will be interesting to find out who wins the argument.

Thanks again!

Jenny

Jenny,
     Glad you found it useful. I actually had a conversation over quite a long period of time. After a while some things clarified themselves in a way that might not have happened otherwise. My big breakthrough was when I realized that my feminine side was always very pleasant and comfortable to me (over a long period of time.) What was making me miserable was my shame, denial, and emotional withdrawal. Once I got past a lot of that, I realized my true self. Actually my last post as "he" was an admission that at this point, "she" is the person and "he" is now the shadow. "He" is now satisfied to be retired, living on a beach somewhere, I guess. "She" only wants "him" as a protector and not for the real joy of living. Enough about me. Sorry! It can be so agonizing to be unsure of what direction to take your life, I hope you have some luck. Take care!
Moni

Thanks again Moni. We will just have to see where this train takes me. Just got back from my transitions meeting at the Gender Identity Center of Colorado. I always wonder if I should go and when I do, it feels wonderful to talk to people that have so many similar stories. Went out afterwards with some of the girls and even though I was dressed in male mode, I felt like one of the girls. Really feels good even though I don't yet know if I will ever transition or not.

Jenny

Welcome t Susan's, Jenny. Some of your introduction is similar. When I was questioning my gender, I tried on my wife's skirt. From then the wheel was set in motion. I thought I was gay but wasn't attracted to men. Support groups helped me to understand much about myself. It is scary but I moved forward. I haven't looked back since.    

Thanks Gennee. I like how you spell your name.

Well, I made some progress today. I see the light at the end of my hotel stay. I put down a deposit for an apartment today. Can't wait to get on with my life!


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Oh, and I have an appointment with a gender therapist next week!


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Quote from: Jenny0713 on April 25, 2016, 11:42:30 PM
Oh, and I have an appointment with a gender therapist next week!


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Best of luck! My first one isn't 'til June.

Hello Jenny! I understand your feelings, and I will say that you are not alone! I had these conflicting feelings about whether or not I was transgender about a few years ago. I did a lot of research and even I still learn new things sometimes. I would just say that it would be best to not jump the shark on anything and you will fully know who you are when the time is right. I will also remind you that it is okay to not understand for a while. There is no rush.

Thanks Vincent!


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I had my first meeting with my gender therapist today. So many questions to answer. Can't wait until the next meeting!


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Hi Jenny, welcome to Susan's Place! Glad to hear you're moving forward with things. See you around the site!

Hugs, Devlyn

Quote from: Jenny0713 on May 05, 2016, 03:27:53 AM
I had my first meeting with my gender therapist today. So many questions to answer. Can't wait until the next meeting!


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Hi Jenny,
     It sounds like you liked the therapist, yes? Glad to here you are moving forward. Still rooting for you.
Moni

Yes. I do like her. I am really excited about learning more about myself with her help.


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