Hello everyone, I'm new on this forum so I hope I'm doing this correctly.

I have a question that has been bugging me for a while, and that I couldn't find any answers to anywhere. I thought maybe one of you guys had an idea...

So, I'm a 20 y o trans guy, and I started T exactly five weeks ago (yay!). So far, I have not noticed any definite changes, although I do believe that I have a few more spots, more hair on my upper legs and my sex drive might have increased a bit.

Another thing that has changed is my voice. A tiiiny bit, maybe. After the first week, I sometimes found myself speaking lower than usual, but it usually only lasted for a couple hours before it went back to normal.
My throat also randomly feels sore sometimes.
However, my "voice drop" is nothing compared to other guys' voice drop that are at 1 month... (I know, it's different for everyone!)

And one thing that really makes me anxious is my eating disorder. I am bulimic (Binging and purging, I don't starve myself anymore and actually try to eat enough everyday) and have been for about five years now. Since my coming out as trans my eating disorder has been getting better big time, but I still relapse from time to time (once or twice a week, which is a lot better than once or twice a day as it was before...). Everytime I purge, my throat feels sore, obviously, and I am... getting so concerned for my vocal cords now that I'm focusing more on my voice than before.

I have been thinking... is there a chance that I am hindering my transition (especially the voice drop) with throwing up so often? I am of course trying to fight my eating disorder regardless of that, but the thought that (this is just me fantasizing) my voice might not drop because I've damaged my vocal cords / am damaging them so often is making me feel so bad and anxious that it triggers relapses even more...
Yesterday and the day before, I cold have sworn that my voice sounded deeper, but I had a really tough day yesterday and ended up purging and now my throat hurts and my voice is sounding higher again... and I hate myself for that so much...

I know this is a very specific question, but I thought maybe, since eating disorders are unfortunately not that uncommon for trans folks, one of you might have experiences with transition while being bulimic and how it affects it?

To sum all that up: Is there a possibility that my bulimia hinders my transition on T? Do any of you have experiences with bulimia?

I'm honestly stressing out over this so much...

Thanks in advance!

I have no experience with bulimia (great to hear how well you're recovering though ); but when I has been on T for 2 weeks I noticed my voice would randomly drop; then go back to normal again then drop again and this cycle would continue until I was around 3 months on T. Hearing from other trans guys this seems to be pretty common so you gave nothing to worry about

Many eating disorders have a psychological connection.

It may be possible with T you feel better and more in control of your life and less given to eating disorders.


Talking about it all issues with an experienced therapist could help.


hugs

I doubt it.

Because the vocal chords are not the same tube as the one you will be vomiting through. The airways are separated from the rest of the tube during swallowing or vomiting. So as long as you don't accidentally get vomit in your airway it's not going to make contact with your chords and therefore shouldn't affect them directly.

However if you do this and it gives you a sore throat, muscle/general tension in the throat as a result of pain/soreness could well be why the voice becomes higher or thinner.

I can't speak from experience; I am actually quite resistant to/unable to vomit even when I need to if I am ill or poisoned. But far as my knowledge of biology goes, this shouldn't affect transition.

Thanks for your replies so far!! And so fast


@ T.K.G.W.  The thing is, many bulimics do report that purging has damaged their vocal cords :/ the voice gets rougher and deeper sometimes because of injuries of the cords. It's actually one of the reasons why bulimia is "extra" bad for singers

That's why I am worrying... I already notice that my voice gets weaker and my throat starts hurting when I talk just a bit more than usual... so I guess it did some damage...

Yeah I mean the acid in it may not touch your chords directly, but it does attack the walls of the throat which will then swell or become tense. So I can see how it can affect your voice temporarily, but it's not going to affect your overall transition process. T will make the chords grow thicker deepening the voice but yeah, I would try to control the urge while your voice is changing if you can see immediate bad effects. The area is sometimes said to get tender anyway during the voice drop phase, best if you can avoid extra damage to it at that point.

ollyander

Sorry to interrupt your thread with some site specific info. I am glad to hear you are moving beyond your bulimia. I know that dysphoria can trigger other physical as well as mental issues. I keep hearing about people who when they move through transition become healthier. Perhaps you can leave it behind soon.

I also wanted to welcome you to the site. There are a lot of people with many different experiences here. Hopefully you can find something useful to help you.

I am sharing some links with you that we try to pass along to newly posting members. They have welcome information and our rules for the site. If you have not had a chance to look though these, please take a moment to do so:

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By	Standard Terms & Definitions	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)
Reputation rules	News posting & quoting guidelines	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy

Once again, welcome to the site. I hope you find what you are looking for and maybe stick around for fun or helping others.

With warmth,

Joanna