Quote from: EmilyRyan on May 17, 2016, 03:46:49 AM
Are there any alternatives for people who aren't disabled but simply can't get a job??

Could you list all the options you've investigated currently?

Some ideas:

- Job Corps: Job Corps exists in every state. It's a federal program by the Department of Labor. As long as you are a citizen, low income, and in need of assistance to find and keep a job, you qualify to apply. Their upper age limit for admission is 24, so if this is of interest to you, you would need to apply ASAP. They provide you with housing, meals, basic medical care, and a small living allowance while training you in a career field and helping you develop independent living skills. It is self paced and you can remain in the program for up to 2 years. Most important for you, they also offer transitional assistance when the program is over, so they would help you find a job, housing, and transportation after you leave the program. I don't know much about the admissions process, but it is easily investigated on your own if you are interested in it.

- The Military: You couldn't serve openly as a trans person just yet, but they are lifting the ban this year. They would feed you, house you, train you, and give you a job. The environment may also help you build yourself up and develop more confidence. I believe most if not all branches enable you to chat with a recruiter online, so I would consider that.

- Higher Education: Pick a school, apply, apply for financial aid, and move. If you want to move to Washington, that is how I would do it, short of finding a job there and moving. Even if it's a community college, you're still eligible for financial aid. You could take out the student loans, move, look for a job and go to school, and figure out what your options are in a new place. It is a lot more appealing to have a fresh start in a place where you may have options than to stay in a place where you have none, even if it does cost you some money later on.

I want to expand on the post above in reference to the Military option.  My qualification for this opinion is 20 years as an Army Officer in the Combat Arms.

Everything said about the Military in that post is true.  However, unless you can change your whole attitude and outlook on life I don't think it would work for you.  The bottom line is you need to stop looking for the easy way to get somebody else to pay you for doing nothing and step up with an aggressive attitude to succeed at any cost.  With your current attitude and outlook I don't think you would make it through basic training, much less in a regular unit.

I know, that's harsh, and maybe mean to say but it's the bare truth.

Obviously all we know about you is what is written in this forum.  But unless there is substantially more to the story you bring most of your troubles on yourself by not believing in yourself, not working hard enough, giving up at the first hurdle, and looking for others to solve your problems.  The fix to all of that is within you, not outside of you.

If you fail at something you want then you identify why you failed, fix the problem yourself, and try again until you succeed.

For better or for worse this is the USA and unless you can demonstrate some internal fortitude to better yourself and move forward no government or charitable organization is going to do it for you.


Sapere Aude

One job that hasn't been mentioned is the trucking industry,there is quite a few transgender driving trucks across America. My son is trans mtf and has been driving for almost 3yrs now and makes good money doing it. When I was a trucker I came across a mtf in California at a truckstop and she was being put down and made fun of til I said something and the fun and games stopped and they looked at her with open eyes and realized how strong she really is by paying for her transition while trucking.She asked me why I defended her, told her I can relate and told her about me,freaked her out that the big burly trucker was also trans,for I don't look it with full facial hair.

Social services, sell things >.>, make three bucks last a whole week, temp. jobs, meet wonderful people in life whom you feel indebted to forever and you most probaby can never repay so you end up feeling guilty and try to be the best person to them as you can.

I was raised poor so I got used to "surviving" haha.

Quote from: Deborah on May 17, 2016, 11:57:37 AM
I want to expand on the post above in reference to the Military option.  My qualification for this opinion is 20 years as an Army Officer in the Combat Arms.

Everything said about the Military in that post is true.  However, unless you can change your whole attitude and outlook on life I don't think it would work for you.  The bottom line is you need to stop looking for the easy way to get somebody else to pay you for doing nothing and step up with an aggressive attitude to succeed at any cost.  With your current attitude and outlook I don't think you would make it through basic training, much less in a regular unit.

I know, that's harsh, and maybe mean to say but it's the bare truth.

Obviously all we know about you is what is written in this forum.  But unless there is substantially more to the story you bring most of your troubles on yourself by not believing in yourself, not working hard enough, giving up at the first hurdle, and looking for others to solve your problems.  The fix to all of that is within you, not outside of you.

If you fail at something you want then you identify why you failed, fix the problem yourself, and try again until you succeed.

For better or for worse this is the USA and unless you can demonstrate some internal fortitude to better yourself and move forward no government or charitable organization is going to do it for you.

Wow ok....

Umm where to begin. For six years counting now I've done nothing but been my own advocate for bettering my self were I could get a decent job and move out of my parent's without worrying if I would starve the next day. After graduating high school back in 2010 I tried a four year college and in 2012 ended up flunking out cause I had difficulty with the courses soo bad even the tutor I were seeing four days a week wasn't helping. And yes I studied by butt off so please don't say it was my study habits.

After that didn't work out I didn't sit around I looked for work like I'm doing now and got lucky to land a job at Goodwill as a Donations attendant. Let me tell you that job was a total nightmare the Goodwill I worked at had a large volume of donors and all would normally have their vehicles packed full of things and most the time I would be the only attendant on duty and it was overwhelming not able to keep up and running behind when it came to putting everything up. The managers for the most part were nice about it only telling me every now then that I need to step it up but were nice enough to not fire me. The corporate head that checks the store once a month did not like my performance and that I was too slow and shouldn't never been hired in the first place and after six months of that job I was suddenly fired. And yes during that job I never showed any signs of being overwhelmed and always kept a smile on my face even when being disciplined for my slowness.

Fast forward a bit after having no luck finding another job it was decided between my parents and I that I try community college and I was on board despite being scared I would fail again. Best decision ever I was able to earn an A.S. Degree last year.

Then during the summer of 2015 I decided to to work another job instead of sitting around all summer long so I applied to Walmart and got a position working in the back unloading trucks not what I wanted to do but hey I was willing to deal with it can't be too hard to do right? I was wrong turned out to be another job that was fast paced. Despite all my efforts to do better at the job I was suddenly let go from the job after two months. I was yet again deemed too slow and incompetent. Seems having a positive attitude and showing up on time isn't enough.

Thankfully I was returning to school to turn my two year degree into a four year in elementary education. I wanted to be a teacher and for all the right reasons it was a passion of mine just like history, geography, and photography. Unfortunately I learned that even with all the passion in the world it doesn't make up for lack of aptitude turns out I didn't have the smarts to be a teacher and failed two of the three main courses for the major and was basically told in the nicest way possible by my adviser, who is also head of the education program at my school, that it's best that I pursue something else.

So now here I am again looking for work filling out applications daily and getting a ride to town about once a week to visit the local temp agency only to always get told I'm unqualified for the jobs they're offering and not getting phone calls from the jobs I applied for. And what few interviews I have landed I get told in the end they're looking for someone with more qualifications as well and I'm not making this up but I was even told that by interviewer at a fast food restaurant (it wasn't even a management position either) you can doubt me all you want there but I'm being honest. 

Sorry that I'm being rude in my response but your post did set me off a bit it did make me cry and feel even more worthless than I already do. It's responses like that that make have a negative outlook.

Yes you're right after all I been through I want it to be easier I'm doing my part in being a self advocate whats wrong with wanting the outside factors to be easy huh?? If things were more affordable like healthcare I wouldn't be looking to getting on medicaid or other forms of assistance.

And sorry but I refuse to join the military I respect all that has been in and currently serving but I know it's not for me and it's not the discipline part either I'm totally unfit for it and plus being trans would make things worse.

That's all I'm gonna say now if you have any more questions or comments please feel to leave and have a good day

Hate to beat a dead horse, especially after you just said it's not an option for you, but the military was a godsend for me. My parents made too much money for me to get financial aid and refused to pay a dime toward that or living expenses, insisting that I make it on my own. I got lucky and had a temp job for $9/hr, which was double the minimum wage, but almost every penny I made went into paying living expenses and transportation to work. I was doing my grocery shopping at the dollar store and still struggling to stretch the money. I can't say it wasn't tough in the military, especially being trans, and I saw some places I never want to see again, but my military service is what put me in the career I'm in now. I work as a consultant now and almost every job offer I got was because the hiring manager liked that I had military experience and in some cases they did the exact same thing in the military. Not to mention I picked up a lot of extra benefits I would not have had if I hadn't done it. If you can muster up the strength to do it, I would highly recommend it. Four years may seem like a long time, but the benefit in the end is worth it in my opinion.

I'm sorry but It's just too tough for me

Like I said try truck driving alot of companies train their drivers and pay your living expenses through training. Besides all your required to do is try to drive 550 miles a day. My son did it and he had the same problem unhireable because of how huge he is 6'4" 385 and wears a size 18 shoe and most places didn't have much rm for him to maneuver,and he is making good money just to go from point a to b in a timely manner. If your single you can love in the truck and watch your expenditures and drive 15yrs with the right company and you can retire in style and be able to transition with no money worries.

I appreciate the suggestion but I can't operate a stick shift or any kind of vehicle for that matter

Okay well this might not help but I have a suggestion. It's complicated, but I've been receiving food stamps in Florida for quite a while now, because I'm disabled. But hear me out, because you don't *need* to be disabled to get them, and it gets interesting.

It gets interesting because, in Florida, they passed a law recently stating that if you are able bodied you can receive food stamps for a certain period of time and then you have to get a job to continue receiving them. I'm given to understand this is happening in other states as well. (Like I said, it's complicated, so keep reading!)

What they do is, you sign up for food stamps. You will get approved for expedited or emergency food assistance benefits if your living expenses exceed your income, which they would for someone with no income. They'll send you a letter in the mail or a notice online (whichever is your preference) stating what you get per month and for how many months you're approved. (Commonly, people have to reapply every four months or so. nbd if you do it in a timely manner.)

Then they'll send you another notice stating you have to work to keep getting your benefits. They'll give you a website to go to and an address to go to if you're unable to do the web orientation. You'll put in your work experience and skills and so on, and they'll help you find a job/get in on some job training/etc. As long as you're *trying* to get a job or cooperating with the program, they'll keep your food benefits going.

Someone else suggested you consider taking college/university courses, which I would second. You can get student loans and grants from the government to help with that. For me, I often got excess financial aid while I was in school, and with that, you can do whatever you like. I also used my aid to find a place to stay, etc, usually on campus but sometimes elsewhere.

With the university stuff, you can just pick whatever major you like at whatever community college or bigger uni type place, and just take gen ed courses at first. Then later you can maybe pick a different major after you've had time to really think about it. Or you could drop out after a semester if your situation changes or you decide that's the thing to do. Like I said, you can get grants and loans or one or the other, and I know having loans is unappealing, but listen, if you can do that, it might be the difference between having a place to stay and not.

And no doubt it be easier to do this in Washington State

Pre-transition I had a decent and very well paying white collar job, then I fell into prostitution. I'm now a luxury escort in Europe. If you know how to do it, there's nothing disgusting. I filter in my ads and say I accept only european men, maximum 40 years and no fatties nor too uglies and it works pretty good. To me it's now fun and earning a lot when I wanna really work. You are your own boss. And everything with condom, even oral, no kissing anything.

eh no thanks

Alot of trucking companies have automatics and they teach you to drive. I've seen people who couldn't drive become good truckers. Don't sell yourself short.

re: what someone said about prostitution... there's always phone work. You could be a phone actress or chat with folks online who are looking for company, without getting anywhere near them if that's not something you're comfortable with.

I've been considering this type of work for myself, actually, especially if I don't get disability. I've been denied already but I have a hearing in September. My situation is complicated, but the point is... you wouldn't have to actually do anything with other people or even be in the same room. You could like do Sudoku puzzles or something while you're pretending to be super into whatever some dude is about. I mean, it's not exactly my idea of a great time, but the option is there.

Or like, I don't know how you'd feel about this, but you could post on Craigslist to clean people's houses and whatnot. I don't know what sort of skills or experience you have in the past, or what hobbies you have, so I would also advise you to consider that. And think about if you have anything worth money that you could sell online or even take to a pawn shop or something. That's a bit more obvious but I'm just trying to suggest anything I think /might/ help.

I give up there's nothing I can do I'm gonna end up homeless, unable to get a job, starve, and unable to get hormones. There's no kind of assistance I can get help from. I'm unable to get the skills needed for the job market because everything is too hard for me. I'm getting to the point where suicide is my only option cause there's nothing in this forsaken country that'll help 

You fall into this pattern every time you post these threads soliciting suggestions for what to do next. I understand that life hasn't worked out for you, and there are a lot of things that you feel you can't do or are uncomfortable doing. But that's really what life is. I know very few people who feel 100% that their job is the exact right fit for them, their knowledge, and their skill set. I'm profoundly uncomfortable doing my current job. It requires me to be an expert in things that I am not, to give advice to business owners and speak at length about the changes they should make in order to stay afloat. It has given me a lot of anxiety and is well outside my comfort zone. But it gives me money and it has great benefits. Until my transition is completely over, I will be staying in this job that completely stresses me out that I feel unfit for.

You will not get positive changes in your life if you insist on maintaining the status quo. Everything you have tried so far hasn't worked for you. You need to try something new if anything is going to change for you for the better.

EmilyRyan you want help or a pitty party,I suggested a job where they train you,give you a truck you can live in til you could afford a place. Don't sell yourself short,this career is the easiest but hardest career outside of the military. I've seen women who have never drove before become better truckers then their male counterparts. What type of job you want? A job where you sit around doing nothing and get paid to do nothing. Like I said I never had problems finding work,most times work came to me because of my reputation. Right now I wash dishes 20 hr's a weekend after 5 yrs making 10 dollars an hr doing it, the job came looking for me because of my work ethic,I have this job as long as I want it, the owners don't want me to quit.

There is a lot in this thread that I can relate to with the OP.

I have a disability (mild to moderate) cerebral palsy. Along with limited vision it prevents me from driving a car. but I just applied, and was granted earlier this week, a reduced disability pass for the local transit bus here in NJ. And after doing some calling, I am eligible for the local disabled bus as well. That one has fixed routes (grocery stores, shopping malls etc) and direct door to door services. So I am not stuck for a ride if I need one.

Also if I can, I do not mind walking from place to place.

I also have some learning issues as well. Math and I are never going to be best friends. But I do my best to figure out how to pay for things I want and need within the budget I have, and the money I make.

Also, what about college course online? That is what I did. I went through a university in Virginia, completely online. I used grants and loans as well. So at least school could be doable for you. Also what was is very nice about that is that it completely self done. Yes there is a professor and other students, but you are responsible for learning the materials by yourself. Which is something that helped me immensely with my own education.

Hope you are doing well and please do not beat yourself up too much.

I really don't know what to say. I'm sorry that I feel the way I do