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If they passed a bathroom law in your area, would you follow it?

Started by suzifrommd, May 24, 2016, 10:34:44 AM

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For those transitioned or transitioning, which bathroom laws would you follow?

None. I would continue to use the bathroom that matches my gender identity.
I would use a gender neutral bathroom to follow the law, but not the bathroom opposite my identity
I would use whichever bathroom the law required me to
I'm not transitioning but I want to see the results of the poll

Alex Forbes

I identify as male, so I use the men's room 99.9% of the time, of course. However, when dressed as Alex, I use the women's room to avoid a major dustup.

I think people should use whatever bathroom they feel is appropriate. In general, I do not support the drafting and application of laws that anticipate criminal activity by a certain type of person or group of people, particularly if these laws are not based on scientific data.
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GurkyCecilia

If I'd go into the men's bathroom, the men and I'd be uncomfortable.
If I'd go into the women's bathroom, only some woman would got uncomfortable.
I don't see any reason to go into the men's bathroom, even if it was law.
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Roses and Songs

#42
   I don't care about laws but I do care about my safety. I recently had an argument on a YT video with a guy who told me that if he caught me in a women's restroom he would kill me. I reacted defiantly (and reported him to YT but nothing happened yet) but if he had been in front of me I guess I would have run as fast as possible. I also think that I would be more useful to the cause if I was not in jail so I think I would comply but not because it's a law, for my own safety and my ability to launch protests and stuff like that. I live in Canada and it's not even an issue here, in fact the governments are curently passing more and more laws and taking more actions to protect us and our rights and I never heard of no one trying to stopping us from going when we have to so seen from the outside this whole debate looks like we're going back to a time when repression and murder were the norm, pathetic. So I wish you all down there the best of luck and I hope that your politicians will eventualy come to their senses but since the religious right has so much power, won't happen tomorrow.

                    Take good care of yourselves, stay safe and keep the ball rolling. Love Rose.

Ps:    The movie is called: I Am A Girl! - Ik ben een meisje! Search for it on YT.

    The name of the guy is Joe Kehoe, here's how he starts: ''no you are not a girl and you can put as many explanation points as you want. you were born a boy? then newsflash that i how you will die. it is medically impossible to change your gender....lmao stop living a delusion you sick f_ck?'' and we go on for 16 replies.

   While you're there you would probably like the movie, it's very very lovely.
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Kova V

First let me say that I'm a patriotic law-abiding citizen, I don't break laws, heck I don't even J-walk. That being said, for my safety I would break this law.
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Arch

This question seems more relevant to non-binaries and trans women than to trans men. But with my receding hairline and this beard (it needs a serious trim, but I've been too lazy), I don't see how I could possibly get more than five feet into an occupied women's restroom without arousing a major ruckus.

If the law were based on the birth certificate, I'd have a hard time persuading anyone that I was AFAB because the name on my BC does not match my other identification, and the only name-change document I have is a homemade "common usage" certificate. It looks reasonably official and was notarized, of course, but I've had a little trouble with it in the past.

I wouldn't have the guts, but I would love to plan a trip to NC for the sole purpose of using every women's restroom I could find.
"The hammer is my penis." --Captain Hammer

"When all you have is a hammer . . ." --Anonymous carpenter
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Roses and Songs

   You know those X ray things they have at airports that can see through clothing, coming soon to a bathroom near you!
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LatrellHK

Quote from: Roses and Songs on June 13, 2016, 03:57:09 AM
   You know those X ray things they have at airports that can see through clothing, coming soon to a bathroom near you!
You know you reminded me of a slightly funny scenario.

I was going back home from BCT and they used that. Me, being unfamiliar with them as it was my second time ever flying, didn't think to take off my tags or tell them anything. So I'm going through and it goes off. I said, in my annoyingly high pitched/feminine/super polite voice, "oh sorry, I forgot these" and took off my dogtags.

Turns out the system was pulling up "two lumps on my chest" and they didn't put two and two together and realize that two weren't just two lumps and I awkwardly got groped by the poor security dude who couldn't say sorry enough times. He literally immediately grabbed the left side and went "Is that a breast?" and I just nodded with a slight grin. I actually chuckled it off and informed him that it'll probably be better to just ask next time first. I did look over and notice they hit 'male' first and were looking at my ID with the most confused faces as I hadn't changed the gender marker on it at that time.

Later on, as I'm flying home, I got into a pretty interesting conversation with the girl who was behind me about the x-ray things and 'you'd think breasts wouldn't show up, moobs exist' and I told her 'well I'm too small for them, so I guess they thought it was contraband'.
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veritatemfurto

Quote from: Roses and Songs on June 13, 2016, 03:57:09 AM
   You know those X ray things they have at airports that can see through clothing, coming soon to a bathroom near you!

They can see through clothing, but NOT under skin.... so any really good tucking/inverting using tight pantyhose/spanx will go undetected. this is also why there is still worry about implants, which would require sniff dogs and "probable cause" court orders to investigate.
~;{@ Mel @};~

My GRS on 04-14-2015


Of all the things there are to do on this planet, there's only one thing that I must do- Live!
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Roses and Songs

Quote from: LatrellHK on June 13, 2016, 09:20:49 AM
He literally immediately grabbed the left side and went "Is that a breast?" and I just nodded with a slight grin. I actually chuckled it off and informed him that it'll probably be better to just ask next time first. I did look over and notice they hit 'male' first and were looking at my ID with the most confused faces as I hadn't changed the gender marker on it at that time.

Later on, as I'm flying home, I got into a pretty interesting conversation with the girl who was behind me about the x-ray things and 'you'd think breasts wouldn't show up, moobs exist' and I told her 'well I'm too small for them, so I guess they thought it was contraband'.

   He grabbed you? That's not right but airports are not either anymore so... I guess I wouldn't have minded that much either but I sure would have played offended, very very offended like AHHH, I can't believe this! (very high and very loud) I can't tell you how how much I dreamed of doing that one day, just like the ''not tonight honey, I have a headache'' thing, I just can't wait for the occasion, I'm single now but I rehearsed it well so I'll be ready. Of course I would just be kidding though and for a very short time too, don't want to lose momentum...

                         Anyway, take care of yourself (at airports) and thanks for sharing. Rose.
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Roses and Songs

Quote from: veritatemfurto on June 13, 2016, 11:40:36 AM
They can see through clothing, but NOT under skin.... so any really good tucking/inverting using tight pantyhose/spanx will go undetected. this is also why there is still worry about implants, which would require sniff dogs and "probable cause" court orders to investigate.

   I started HRT 5 years ago at 53 so my face tells all and will always tell all, they wouldn't need any machine to decide that I would probably be a perfect candidate for a more 'complete' check up I guess. I'm convinced I would be embarassed at least a little by any type of search they would give me but hey, if that's what it takes. My only worry thinking about it is I hope I wouldn't forget to check if 'everything' was well in it's place and tucked away nicely before I got off the plane. Standing in line at customs and realizing I forgot to perform a complete check up would be... AHHHH, and you know what, it could happen, I'm kind of an airhead sometimes, just talking about it and I feel weird already...

                                 Anyway, thanks for you reply and be happy, Rose.

                                                                 
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Jessie Ann

I guess it would depend on what the law actually says.  For me the only way that they could even begin to force me back into the men's room would be to create a law that requires you to use the restroom of the sex you were assigned at birth.  The big problem they would have is how would they prove what that was?  However I have publicly made statements about my change and there is a record of my legal name and gender change.  All of my currently issued government issued documentation and identity documents indicate I am female.  Birth certificate, Social Security, Passport, work ID and drivers license all have my correct name and gender.

That said, I am female and I will use the ladies room.  Always.  [except when at a large gathering and the line for the ladies room is to long and the men's room line is short....just like many of my cis sisters] 
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LatrellHK

Quote from: Roses and Songs on June 13, 2016, 03:10:20 PM
   He grabbed you? That's not right but airports are not either anymore so... I guess I wouldn't have minded that much either but I sure would have played offended, very very offended like AHHH, I can't believe this! (very high and very loud) I can't tell you how how much I dreamed of doing that one day, just like the ''not tonight honey, I have a headache'' thing, I just can't wait for the occasion, I'm single now but I rehearsed it well so I'll be ready. Of course I would just be kidding though and for a very short time too, don't want to lose momentum...

                         Anyway, take care of yourself (at airports) and thanks for sharing. Rose.

Meh, I laugh things off to avoid snapping. But will do. Now that my gender marker does in fact say male, I just gotta worry about that happening again and this time awkwardly explaining myself.

Though I NEVER fly. The only reason I was in a plane said day was because I was flying back home from BCT. First, second, and last for a long time riding on one.

Now as Jessie Ann is saying, that's a huge flaw with the law. How could they prove anything? They could go by looks but I know tons of friends who aren't trans and look/dress differently than what society deems appropriate for a male or female. My cousin identifies as a stud and my friend here does as well. Both of them look and sound pretty masculine, yet they're cisgender women.

Now if you ARE trans, how can they even remotely prove that, especially if you're not out about it? I mean they can kinda reach down there and check but that's sexual assault and last time I checked, I'm the pervert not the person so concerned with my genitals.
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sparrow

Quote from: LatrellHK on June 13, 2016, 07:36:29 PM
Meh, I laugh things off to avoid snapping. But will do. Now that my gender marker does in fact say male, I just gotta worry about that happening again and this time awkwardly explaining myself.

Just practice... "mind your ____ business, it's medical."  A bit of genuine shame-faced indignation goes a long way in a situation like that.
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veritatemfurto

or you could pull a funny awkward moment on them, like in mrs doubtfire where robin blows off messing up between characters when caught by his boss still wearing lipstick but is too drunk to freak about it... or dr frankenfurter playing both sides...
~;{@ Mel @};~

My GRS on 04-14-2015


Of all the things there are to do on this planet, there's only one thing that I must do- Live!
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Kylo

I'd break the law because there's about 1 patrol car for the entire county and I only ever see it outside the fish and chip shop.
"If the freedom of speech is taken away, then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter."
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JLT1

Quote from: Cindi Jones on May 24, 2016, 07:07:10 PM
I absolutely would obey the law and then sue the local government when they arrest me. We need some legal action on these silly laws. All my documents indicate the F marker. I have a valid birth certificate. My anatomy is female.

I WOULD use the freakin mens room to make a point. ARREST ME.

Cindi

Ditto for me.

Men's restroom.  Let people feel uncomfortable with me....


Hugs

Jen
To move forward is to leave behind that which has become dear. It is a call into the wild, into becoming someone currently unknown to us. For most, it is a call too frightening and too challenging to heed. For some, it is a call to be more than we were capable of being, both now and in the future.
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Tessa James

I was at a national college trustees conference this week and was seated next to a delegation from North Carolina.  What  an opportunity!  While trustees from my state of Oregon are elected, the NC trustees are appointed by their governor.  The same one who signed, the now infamous, bathroom bill.   

I inquired about how their college was responding to the federal directives and heard that they "might" need to fix some bathrooms but "it really isn't a problem" as there are no transgender students there!  They seemed to feel it was the City of Charlotte that overreached with laws that would have protected us. 

I asked how they knew there are no trans students attending their school and got a bit of um, ah, oh gee and hopefully a bit of introspection followed.  Education isn't always easy for educators either ;D  I was so happy to be a visible reference for them and hope they reconsider their responsibility to keep all students and staff safe.
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013
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alex10

I would continue using the one that matches my gender identity, but I would feel much more anxiety about it
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KarlMars

I'm not sure, because after I've been on hormones and pass as male I wouldn't want to make women scream even though I'm legally still female.

JustASeq

I'd use the bathroom matching my identity and would love to see someone try and stop me.
-Seq
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