Quote from: Sebby Michelango on July 09, 2016, 02:44:03 PM
I wish I was a cis guy. But it doesn't bother me if I'm not average or boring. Stands out a bit is fine. I don't want to stand out because I'm not cis, but rather stand out of something else.

This was a good answer. I like the scenery where is that mountain located?

Quote from: alienbodybuilder on July 09, 2016, 09:02:34 PM
I got a lot of negative attention when perceived as an attractive female. Do you think that being female has anything to do with wanting to be paid attention to?

. Absolutely not , I think all people seek validation in one form or another. I mean here on these forums a great deal of these conversations are our own searching for validation . I think early in my transition it was important to hear I was pretty or to feel wanted . Nowadays not so much , but it took a long time to get there .

Quote from: alienbodybuilder

Quote from: TysilioI'm pretty boring at heart. I've spent my life, pre-transition, standing out a lot more than I'd like, trying to make life work as a gender-non-conforming woman.  When I started transitioning, one of the things that was most attractive about it was the prospect of blending in, being just another geezer wandering through Home Depot.

    The position I find myself in now is a bit ironic: physically and temperamentally, I'm "just some guy," but as I emerge from depression and hiding, I find myself drawn to various forms of activism that put me out there in public as a transgender man.  It's not at all what I planned when I started transitioning, but it does seem that a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.

So are you saying you were a boring guy until you were drawn to forms of transgender activism and now that makes you different?

Nor exactly. I have the same wish to be an ordinary guy that I had when I started transitioning, but it's important to me to to do what I can to make a difference for myself and for other trans people, and that gets in the way of being able to be that boring-ish regular guy. Even though "just some guy" is what my life looks like much of the time, the fact that I'm pretty focused on trans issues keeps me from fully inhabiting that self.

Quote from: Gianna2014 on July 09, 2016, 10:13:13 PM
. Absolutely not , I think all people seek validation in one form or another. I mean here on these forums a great deal of these conversations are our own searching for validation . I think early in my transition it was important to hear I was pretty or to feel wanted . Nowadays not so much , but it took a long time to get there .

I never thought about the validation thing. I just think I want to express myself and care about the image I project because it has to do with how I'll be treated. That's building self esteem I guess.

Quote from: Tysilio on July 09, 2016, 10:25:56 PM
So are you saying you were a boring guy until you were drawn to forms of transgender activism and now that makes you different?

Nor exactly. I have the same wish to be an ordinary guy that I had when I started transitioning, but it's important to me to to do what I can to make a difference for myself and for other trans people, and that gets in the way of being able to be that boring-ish regular guy. Even though "just some guy" is what my life looks like much of the time, the fact that I'm pretty focused on trans issues keeps me from fully inhabiting that self.

So I guess you can be an ordinary guy with an extra humanitarian twist. It makes you a good guy to still care about other transpeople.

Thanks.

Quote from: Tysilio on July 09, 2016, 11:25:22 PM
Thanks.

You're welcome.

Considering what the type of people that bore me are into, no, I'd rather be non-boring and non-ordinary. But I would like their level of material comforts and support, I won't lie.

I think there is a huge difference between average and boring. I have never been average but I think many people would agree that I am boring...
At heart, I am an intellectual, reform-minded activist sort who prides non-conformity to social conventions so definitely not "average" in our society...
Yet I am also a PhD in an obscure field, a socially anxious and awkward nerd who likes to disappear in most social settings and would rather hang out at home than attend social functions... therefore, I am often boring and I like my life largely uneventful.

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I'd like the option for the most part just blend into the background; not be noticed and not have that fear in the back of my mind that somebody will suss out I'm trans. I know I'll never be average/boring whatever because of how I like to look or because of my personality, but I'd definitely like the option to become invisible when I choose to as I haven't been able to before.