hi, this is my first post. you can call me con.

i am 18 years old and i will be leaving for college very soon. currently i present as female (which is the gender i was assigned at birth) however i have known i am transgender since I was 13. i am hoping i can start to present in a way that i am more comfortable with now that ill be living on my own.

so im nonbinary i guess. not a cis female, not a trans man, just some kind of being in between. in my ideal vision of myself, i see a stronger jaw, broader shoulders, a bit of a deeper voice and a little more body hair. and i am wearing a cool thrifted sweater and a denim jacket, but thats besides the point :+)

mostly what i am concerned about is, do nonbinary individuals ever get hormone treatments? are there doctors/therapists out there who understand what nonbinary means and they actually will get you hormones?

and my other concern is, hormones are a big change. have you ever heard of someone regretting getting them? i feel like a little testosterone will turn me into the person i want to be, and i will feel more comfortable that way. but i am not miserable as a woman. unhappy, feeling lost and incomplete, yes. but if i were to go my whole life pretending to be a cis female and never get hormones, it would not be the absolute end of my world. i am hopeful that they could make me feel oh so much better, yet i am fearful that it could somehow be a mistake. has anyone else ever felt this way?

Hi . Lots of nb people; including myself take hormone treatment. I wanted all the physical changes you've listed and am happy that I've now got them; but i want to develop a bit more. I don't want to look hugely masculine but some sort of androgyny. As for doctors/therapists many still don't have much experience treating nb individuals and they may slow down your treatment. For that reason i didn't mention my feminity to my gender therapist and implied to her i was a binary trans man.
And people only regret taking hormones if they either haven't thougjt about being trans for a long time or dont weigh up the pros and cons of taking T thoroughly or simply take it and realise it's not for them.  As for the latter there's nothing wrong with that and it doesn't make you any less trans. I worried about regretting it even when i had the hormones in my hand and upto 3 or so months; but knew the 'what if' aspect would drive me crazy for life if I didn't try T.

Quote from: constantine on July 18, 2016, 03:15:51 AM
hi, this is my first post. you can call me con.

i am 18 years old and i will be leaving for college very soon. currently i present as female (which is the gender i was assigned at birth) however i have known i am transgender since I was 13. i am hoping i can start to present in a way that i am more comfortable with now that ill be living on my own.

so im nonbinary i guess. not a cis female, not a trans man, just some kind of being in between. in my ideal vision of myself, i see a stronger jaw, broader shoulders, a bit of a deeper voice and a little more body hair. and i am wearing a cool thrifted sweater and a denim jacket, but thats besides the point :+)

mostly what i am concerned about is, do nonbinary individuals ever get hormone treatments? are there doctors/therapists out there who understand what nonbinary means and they actually will get you hormones?

and my other concern is, hormones are a big change. have you ever heard of someone regretting getting them? i feel like a little testosterone will turn me into the person i want to be, and i will feel more comfortable that way. but i am not miserable as a woman. unhappy, feeling lost and incomplete, yes. but if i were to go my whole life pretending to be a cis female and never get hormones, it would not be the absolute end of my world. i am hopeful that they could make me feel oh so much better, yet i am fearful that it could somehow be a mistake. has anyone else ever felt this way?

What's up, Con?

I am nb too just like you and Elis. You bring up great questions and concerns that really show your interest in transitioning. From my experience, unfortunately, alot of the medical field has not catch up with the times yet. There are good endocrinologist out there. But be aware of the ones, especially the older ones, who are stuck in stereotypes. My last one actually asked me some very uncomfortable questions regarding my sexuality, which, in a way, has nothing to do with my gender. He seemed surprised that I too did not mind a low dose and made it look like not much would happen.

I am not on T because of how much that endo feared a lawsuit due to my health, but anyways I hope you don't run into the same issues I did. So do you have a letter for HRT yet? Any plans for GRS, because I think you need a letter for that too. Not all trans folk want GRS, which was another issue with that endo I had. He just assumed that all trans people are like this stereotype; all want hormones, all want surgery, all attracted to the opposite sex of their preferred gender.

Anyway, Con, you will find alot of nb people here that you can hopefully relate to.

Hey con!

Welcome to Susan's Great to have you here - looking forward to seeing you around the forum.

Yes, NB people can and do take HRT. Finding an understanding medical practitioner though might be dependent on where you live. The only people who regret taking hormones are usually those who didn't fully understand what the effects were and/or had unrealistic expectations and/or weren't fully sure of their identity to begin with. I'd suggest a therapist could be helpful if you feel doubt.

Keep in mind that it is not possible to achieve a tailored outcome from taking hormones. Everyone's body is unique and what works in a particular way for one person might not for another. You might want a particular look from HRT but there is no guarantee. For example, once your skeleton stops developing (around your current age) no amount of testosterone is likely to change the shape of your chin, the shape of your shoulders would be unlikely to change without significant gym work. Growing a "bit more" body hair is not something that happens quickly and you may find you also end up with facial hair and a change in your hairline...ultimately it's all in your DNA!

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Grace

I am lucky enpugh to have a good therapist and a doctor specializing in trans.

They listen to me and we go with it.

In the beginning, in another state, i went for a binary transition.  As far as I can tell, they were pretty locked into that.

I take and need full mtf transition hormones.  I yet, I am nonbinary.

I agree with everyone here too.

A good gender therapist is crucial, imo.  I still see mine and I am 3 years plus into this now, with zero regrets.

Trinity.

Hi Con, welcome to Susan's. Yes I have heard of some regretting getting them. It's not exactly a common thing, but it does and can happen. It's part of why often doctor's will start you on low dose to see how your handling it. Yes many non binary individuals do get hormone treatments and do really well on them especially once they get the right regimen for them. I have known several that are perfectly happy with them. It is true that hormones can be a big change, but much of that change doesn't happen right off the bad and in many cases can be reversed if not desired except for some things. Yes, please do seek out a good gender therapist. It will be crucial in helping you along with the mental and physical changes that can occur with HRT along with everything else transition related. I look forward to seeing you around the forums. Good luck and Hugs
Mariah