My mom is obsessed wit-no. HELLBENT on the family packing up and moving to Sweden. She has been trying to get us to move since 2013, and she isn't shutting up about how it's much cleaner, friendlier, and more culturally enriched than America will ever hope to be. I still think she's wearing rose-colored glasses, but she's really dead set regardless. With this election, she's more determined than ever to jump ship and swim to the netherlands. Is it REALLY all it's cracked up to be? I was promised we were done moving. I was promised our latest home would be our final home. I was promised I could make more friends in New York than in Massachusetts. I was promised a lot of things.

So you can imagine why I am casting a small shadow of doubt on such a grand move far away from anyone I have ever come to love. I don't say it often to my family, but I am secretly BOILING under my skin knowing that for me, nowhere is home, our family will in all likelihood never settle down ANYWHERE, and I have no choice but to go where my family goes. FOREVER.

It will never matter how old I am, what my plans are for my life, where I would like to be, if my parents want to go somewhere, I need to be dragged along. I am infuriatingly dependent because I'm not bothered with things like insurance information, phone bills, or anything of importance and necessity to a successful independent adult life, even though I have ASKED to have those things. MULTIPLE TIMES. But every time, my mother is INSISTENT that she can handle it for me. She almost gets MAD when I keep pushing for it, almost like she doesn't want me to ever have them. At the very least, I control my own money. My bank account is about the only independent adult thing I have. I digress.

I don't know if Sweden is the answer. I don't even know where I want to go to be happy anymore. I've considered taking a train and just going wherever until I run out of money, but where could I go with the assurance that nothing will uproot me again?

Sweden has a socialist form of government where many services are provided to the population. The net result of this is the personal tax rate is pretty high and the services provided to the population are regulated and approved by the government. You might ask your mother if she is aware of this.

The only benefit of Sweden would be the healthcare situation. AFAIK, Scandinavia in general is pretty ahead of the curve on taking care of trans healthcare. Socialised medicine means you'd likely have to be approved for a transition program, and you'd have to wait for hormones and surgery if those are what you want, but the costs would be minimal as they'd be covered by your significantly higher taxes.

But is that alone worth it? That's something I can't answer for you.

How does your mother intend to move your whole family there? Do they have a lot of money? Do your parents work in fields that are in demand? Do you have family in the country? What I would be concerned about, since it doesn't seem like you really want to go and you want something stable, is that your family could probably be approved to stay there for a limited amount of time. And at the end of that time, you'd have to re-apply or move again. Since moving doesn't seem like something you're keen on, I'd inquire more as to what your mom thinks would enable to move and stay in a foreign country as an American.

We do have the means financially, I love to cook and bake and have held jobs in the restaurant and bakery industry, so a job for me might not be a problem. My mom is a published writer, and my brother is getting his third bachelor's degree, this time in Psychology. We don't have any family unfortunately. I know we have talked about a getting a temporary stay like a vacation before we go all in, we do want to do that first.

I am concerned about the attitude towards trans folk in general in Sweden. Like I know it's progressive in their laws and access to resources and medical needs and whatnot, but is there stigma? Silent hatred?

The notion of Sweden is quite romantic, read and read as much as you can, make sure you are fully informed before you go, it's a beautiful country with wonderful folk, to make sure it's not the romance of the idea that is the attraction. In many respects the Netherlands and Denmark are more 'American' in their approach, underpinned by Scandinavian principles, so can be felt as much more accessible, but they all have their own unique and wonderful characteristics.

Sno