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Pronouns refused?

Started by j-unique, August 21, 2016, 09:44:02 AM

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j-unique

August 21, 2016, 09:44:02 AM
Did near people (friends, parents/relatives etc.) ever refuse to using a certain pronoun (like "she") for you when you have explicitly asked? How did you react / what was your strategy to deal with that?

I know that it shouldn't matter what other people think, do, etc., and I know that I'll never pass as a woman, but it hurts nevertheless ...
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Elis

#1
August 21, 2016, 10:08:39 AM
My dad screwed up a lot when I came out and I'm pretty sure he knew he was doing it. I ended up sending a text to him a few weeks later explaining how hurtful it was and he rarely does it now. I also told him and family it's understandable to get it wrong because they're used to using old pronouns but it's important to correct yourself.

Btw; you might want to check the before and after mtf thread. It's amazing the transformation that's possible even after decades of T poisoning.
They/them pronouns preferred.



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Tommy K

#2
August 25, 2016, 10:39:23 PM
My father outright refuses to use "he". The rest of my family completely ignore it.
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Michelle_P

#3
August 25, 2016, 11:03:19 PM
Oh, absolutely.  My spouse refuses to even recognize my transgender nature.  Total denial.

This makes like interesting, for highly conflicted values of interesting...
Earth my body, water my blood, air my breath and fire my spirit.

My personal transition path included medical changes.  The path others take may require no medical intervention, or different care.  We each find our own path. I provide these dates for the curious.
Electrolysis - Hours in The Chair: 238 (8.5 were preparing for GCS, five clearings); On estradiol patch June 2016; Full-time Oct 22, 2016; GCS Oct 20, 2017; FFS Aug 28, 2018; Stage 2 labiaplasty revision and BA Feb 26, 2019
Michelle's personal blog and biography
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j-unique

#4
August 26, 2016, 09:00:29 AM
Ok, seems to be a common problem :(

At the moment, I don't want even to talk with my parents (and some "friends") because of that.

Some days ago, a friend told me "Life's too short to surround yourself with people who want to make you depressed" ... maybe she was right. ???
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Elis

#5
August 26, 2016, 10:54:08 AM
Quote from: j-unique on August 26, 2016, 09:00:29 AM
Ok, seems to be a common problem :(

At the moment, I don't want even to talk with my parents (and some "friends") because of that.

Some days ago, a friend told me "Life's too short to surround yourself with people who want to make you depressed" ... maybe she was right. ???

Of course she was right; she's definitely one to hold on too. All of our negative thoughts come from our environment; it's up to yourself to nip those thoughts in the bud.
They/them pronouns preferred.



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