I knew I was trans at 17, came out and started HRT at 25, had top surgery and a hysterectomy at 26, and will hopefully be done with all the stages of phallo before I'm 29. I transitioned after college after being very professionally established, and I had no issues. If I could go back and transition earlier, I do think college breaks would've been a lot easier for me in terms of scheduling, but insurance was not as friendly at the time and I wouldn't have been able to afford it.
If I were to be in your position now, first:
- I'd start HRT ASAP.
- I'd get my name changed, preferably before graduating high school so that you can apply to college as yourself.
Top surgery:
- If you have insurance or have saved up the money, I'd personally have top surgery on a college winter break or the summer before college if possible. Most surgeons cite their recovery period as between 3-6 weeks. What you'd feel up to doing is really individual. I took off a week for top surgery and then went back to work because I heal quickly, wasn't in pain, and was bored at home. A lot of guys seem to take between 2-4 weeks.
Bottom surgeries:
- You need a hysterectomy 3-6 months in advance of metoidioplasty or phalloplasty. So getting this done earlier is probably a good idea. If it is done laparoscopically, your recovery time will be minimal. I took a long weekend from work (Thurs-Sunday) and went back in on Monday. Some guys need a whole week. Some guys need longer. I would say as long as it is done this way, you could do it over a winter break. If it is done abdominally, you should have it done on a summer break. It is a more invasive surgery and you have much greater limitations.
- For metoidioplasty: This is typically done in 2 stages as long as there are no complications (can be done in 1 stage if you don't want testicular implants). The first stage is the most complicated. I would schedule this for a summer break, ideally as soon as your semester is over. Most surgeons have a 10-20% complication rate with meta, so giving yourself a full 3 months to heal would be best. Most guys I know have gone back to work somewhere between 4-6 weeks after as long as they had minimal complications.
- For phalloplasty: The amount of stages for this depend on the donor site chosen and what all you want done. Like meta, the first stage is the most complicated, and I would again say to schedule at the very beginning of your summer break so that you have as much time as possible to heal. Phalloplasty complication rates are usually 30-40%, and most guys take 6-8 weeks off work.
You're not completely bed ridden during recovery for any of these procedures, but what you'd feel up to doing really depends on you. I don't know what kind of work you'd be doing so I can't really say if you'd be able to do it during recovery. My job enables me to work remotely, so I did that for the week I was home after top surgery and the few days I was out for my hysto. Phallo is much more invasive and taxing, so my plan currently is to take 2 weeks off completely and then work remotely for 2 weeks. At the end of that period, I'll assess where I'm at. From guys I've spoken to, it's pretty reasonable as long as I don't have major complications.