Last night I had a nightmare where I was in a dark parking lot and a couple of guys were acting drunk. I made a funny passing comment and they turn around and cuss me out. So I reply "well I hope you get ****ed by a cactus!" so one of them draws back like he was gonna punch me, and I whip my knife out and cut his arm, at which point he says he was gonna call 911 and then chases me. I run up a few flights of stairs until he disengages. I then realize I'm in a hotel, but not a nice one. The walls are a sickening sea foam color and the wallpaper was tearing and peeling. It was very run down. My manager from work shows up from one of the rooms. "Hey wanna watch a movie with Mollie (my ex-wife IRL) and Lauren (a woman I met at a store I regularly go to a year  ago IRL) and me?" And I said sure. So we watched the movie for a bit and I got bored so I went downstairs. On the way downstairs I asked a bellhop where we were, and he said we were in Jakarta, Indonesia.
When I got to the ground level floor I saw a middle-aged Southeast Asian-looking man running a sick game show type game in a bar/restaurant that involved people cooking a fish and spicing it and then a woman would taste it. If it was hot enough to make her cry, the player would be spared but would get a hard kick to the rear. If it wasn't that spicy, the player would be killed. It was time for me to make my plate. I do it and I survive. Only to see that my dad was there but he thought it was just a fun game. I finally convinced him to run with me to escape. The middle aged man started chasing us with a sword at which point my dad found a sword on the ground. Not long after we reach a dead end, with our pursuer gaining on us. I found a battleaxe in the corner and picked it up. Right as he caught up and started attacking my dad and I was about to assist my dad, my phone alarm went off and I woke up.

Any idea what this nightmare might mean?

Are you stressed out in life ....i remember  when i was i had the craziest  dreams / nightmares  and a friend of mine is  close to having ameltdown  and she has horrible  nightmares
Have you ever tried lucid dreaming where you wake your self up in your dream ......thats interesting
dreams generally  have no meaning its just the mind trying to sort out life events or the unconscious  primal mind trying to make sense of the sensory input from the days or weeks events

The best person to interpret this dream is yourself. Dreams are a way for the emotional side of your brain to process how you feel about what's been going on in your life lately, or what is looming on the horizon. Dreams aren't necessarily literal; we're rarely able to fully digest our emotions during our waking hours, so the images & experiences we dream about are just our brains' way of exploring how we feel about our lives, usually through metaphor. So examine the way you felt in each scene and try to relate it to things that are happening in real life that make you feel the same way.

For example: that fight with those drunk guys could be about some sort of conflict that's going on in your life, or perhaps a struggle against masculinity itself? How did you feel when you were fighting them? Why were you angry with them? What makes you feel the same way IRL?

The reference to Indonesia might have something to do with feeling out of place, or that you're currently in unfamiliar territory, or even more literally it might be a reference to the fact that a lot of trans people travel to foreign countries to access various services. How did you feel when you were in that grotty hotel? What makes you feel the same way IRL?

The game show might be interpreted by honestly examining how you feel about the possibility of transitioning (or perhaps some other area of your life). It's a painful process that's difficult to go through (like that spicy meal) and in many cases transitioning is a live-or-die decision, and even those who choose to live wind up getting a metaphorical kick in the rear from society in general, so even our best-case scenario is far from ideal in many cases. Does the thought of possibly transitioning make you feel the way you felt during that game show?

As for your dad, is it possible that he's not taking you as seriously as you might like? I'd imagine you love him & want what's best for him, so do you feel some sort of guilt for somehow being involved in making his life more complicated that you'd like it to be & do you wish you could protect him from further harm?

This is purely about how you feel about it. And once you honestly examine the emotions you felt during your dream & identify their real-life causes, you'll feel at peace about them.

Quote from: FTMDiaries on September 28, 2016, 07:28:46 AM
The best person to interpret this dream is yourself. Dreams are a way for the emotional side of your brain to process how you feel about what's been going on in your life lately, or what is looming on the horizon. Dreams aren't necessarily literal; we're rarely able to fully digest our emotions during our waking hours, so the images & experiences we dream about are just our brains' way of exploring how we feel about our lives, usually through metaphor. So examine the way you felt in each scene and try to relate it to things that are happening in real life that make you feel the same way.

For example: that fight with those drunk guys could be about some sort of conflict that's going on in your life, or perhaps a struggle against masculinity itself? How did you feel when you were fighting them? Why were you angry with them? What makes you feel the same way IRL?

The reference to Indonesia might have something to do with feeling out of place, or that you're currently in unfamiliar territory, or even more literally it might be a reference to the fact that a lot of trans people travel to foreign countries to access various services. How did you feel when you were in that grotty hotel? What makes you feel the same way IRL?

The game show might be interpreted by honestly examining how you feel about the possibility of transitioning (or perhaps some other area of your life). It's a painful process that's difficult to go through (like that spicy meal) and in many cases transitioning is a live-or-die decision, and even those who choose to live wind up getting a metaphorical kick in the rear from society in general, so even our best-case scenario is far from ideal in many cases. Does the thought of possibly transitioning make you feel the way you felt during that game show?

As for your dad, is it possible that he's not taking you as seriously as you might like? I'd imagine you love him & want what's best for him, so do you feel some sort of guilt for somehow being involved in making his life more complicated that you'd like it to be & do you wish you could protect him from further harm?

This is purely about how you feel about it. And once you honestly examine the emotions you felt during your dream & identify their real-life causes, you'll feel at peace about them.

A lot of what you mentioned rings true.
I often feel like my masculinity is sabotaging this new life I'm creating. Sometimes I feel totally hopeless because of my facial features, my hair growth, my hands and feet, my voice. Bear in mind, I'm also clinically diagnosed with OCD. Like, real OCD, not just somebody saying they're OCD because they want their house to be cleaner than most. That mixed with dysphoria... Not a pleasant combination.

As for the hotel, I'm still unsure about its meaning or relevance. Maybe it's a representation of my body and mind? Dysphoria aside, I have several health problems (physical, neurological, and psychological). These include Tourette's syndrome (and no, that does not mean I uncontrollably scream swear words haha. for me, it's a combination of minor twitches and back-of-throat noises and sometimes stuttering.), Asperger's syndrome, the aforementioned OCD, Bipolar, ADHD, anxiety, depression, and I'm slightly overweight.

Being in a third-world country in Southeastern Asia would definitely be a good metaphor