I'm taking low dose Progynova and finasteride (amount to prevent hair loss). My doctor knows that I was going to get the Fin from an online pharmacy but I never said anything about the Estrogen. Anyway, I had blood work back, everything was good before starting. T levels were around 400 ng/dl.

I've felt I was trans since I was very young,  It was always not *if* but when I would do this. I worry because I am getting older, I must do something very soon. So I thought I would just test to see how I respond to it, just for a couple weeks or so. To see if it feels right. I did see a counsellor (referred by doctor) for Dysphoria in 2013; but then I met a girl and tried to distract myself. Never worked. It always comes back.

I feel amazing. My mind feels clear, I feel more normal and present. I'm starting to actually like what I look like in the mirror already. I've never been very masculine, at most boyish, but can get mistaken for being a girl if not too close. It's only been two weeks since estrogen, yet I have noticed my skin smooth out all over.

I am already starting to look feminine in the mirror. I cannot believe how fast I'm changing.  I told my parents I was taking the fin and it would make my skin smoother.... but never said it would turn me into look like a girl (they don't know!) I never thought I would react so quickly...

I wonder if people will notice more because I am almost in the middle between both genders? or is it less obvious than if I was very masculine and ended up looking feminine?

Other things I've noticed

- Quite a bit fat accumulation in the breast within 10 days. Already had some there, but now it's like a handful D: No actual breast tissue though, but nipples were sore on and off after about 3 days. Surprised about this cos my BMI is only around 19.

- My acne marks that would never fade are fading. And my skin is almost porcelain or doll like. I always had an amazing skincare regimen, but this is crazy. My skin complexion looks better, cleaner, smoother. I love it!

- I look younger. This is funny because I'm 32 years old, but people think I am in my late teens (Good diet and skincare). Now I seem to be looking even younger.

- Males seem oblivious, but females in the family are picking up on something. Maybe I am paranoid, but it's like they can sense something different.

- my sense of smell has improved

- I feel calm and relaxed. I'm laughing and joking around more too.

- My body temp is normally low, but now it's even colder

- I'm really hungry...

- Facial hair growing much slower

I'm wondering what to do. Should I stop?  NHS wait is about 4 years apparently... that is not an option. I guess I could go private. My first initial thought was to leave this until after Christmas and be a bit more prepared. Now that I've taken estrogen, it's hard... it's hard to stop. :| 

If I stop now, I will respond to estrogen just as well in the new year?

I'd continue to take finasteride of course, to keep my hair; but I wonder if I can keep the changes I have with a testosterone blocker?

This post might be seen as self medding advocacy and if its deleted I understand. With that said, waiting four years like you mention is not an option. That just sounds like torture to me. I suffered heavily from dysphoria prehrt. So I say keep it up for as long as you can and do go private as soon as possible. Your future self will thank you.

Do make sure you're on a multi-vitamin, have a good steady diet and you're drinking plenty of water to avoid any kind of cramping. As long as you keep yourself healthy and manage to get blood work done then should be ok. I'd also recommend taking the E pill sublingually for better absorbtion since I'm guessing you're at a low dose so you might as well get the most out of it imo.

oh wow, no I am definitely not advocating self medding. I'll be letting my GP know soon anyway because I will have to arrange some blood tests. He already knew I was about to take finasteride and had no problem with it; but he couldn't prescribe on the NHS. (this is more of a precaution).

I feel like it's getting harder, the dysphoria grows stronger with every passing year. For 20 years or so it's been on my mind almost every day. Mentally I am exhausted from it tbh. I need to free up that mental energy to actually be productive in my life. I'm not suicidal or anything though, but it is stopping me growing in many ways.

I do eat a very clean and healthy diet already - mainly fruits, vegetables, nuts and all healthy stuff. I take very good care of myself, always have. Also I take half a multi and supplement where needed. I get blood tests done every year and everything comes back very healthy levels, so I'm sure I'll be okay - I'll just get them done a bit more frequently for now...

I take sublingually already, but wasn't sure if it helped.. Thanks you

I had very quick results and HRT changes too.  Hugs Shannon