Personally, I haven't heard of many folk who take the road less travelled, because of a whim. But then, I don't get out a lot.

The question regarding role and identity is interesting - for me, I respond to a female role, and get really uppity if a natal alpha female 'out femmes' me.

I discovered my identity by accidentally examining why I might be doing that.

In many ways, my behaviour and role expectation is female, and knowing this I have been able to restore some sense of calm to my world. Yes, I still get physical dysphoria that I can still manage, even though I am aware that my physique does not match my internal intrinsic expectation.

My world is tolerable at the moment, partly thanks to the comfort of knowing why I feel this way. I do not feel the need to transition at the moment, as I can manage and tolerate this improved understanding of mind, but I am open and aware that this may change in the future.

I've spent 6 months reading, studying and have made a lot of progress towards being more understanding of myself - I'm not sure that someone who is cis, would have spent that much time, thought or emotional investment in the topic, just to stand out, but then I may be underestimating the human race....

Happy as a trans.

Rowan.

Yes, I did.  I remember a woman who was trialing being a transman before going on testosterone (which did not happen, and she decided it wasn't for her).  I don't remember why that was, as it must have happened between 1999 and 2004.

Quote from: CarlyMcx on November 01, 2016, 12:40:22 AM
  I recall that one of them actually had a diagnosis for borderline personality disorder.  (This is a disorder where the person does not really know who they are, so they tend to "try on" different personas.  You can see how this would be a problem.) 

  This is not what borderline personality order is.  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorderhttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder

This is what BPD actually is http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/borderline-personality-disorder/Pages/Introduction.aspx. Absolutely nothing like trying new personas or tricking yourself into thinking you're trans.

I've met at least one. A young man with '->-bleeped-<-' tendencies I'm socially acquainted with told me he wanted to transition, except he never could describe it in anything other that wasn't clearly a sexual fantasy. I kept trying to get him to do more thinking and he just got really angry, and he ended up actually going to a trans clinic with a useless rubber-stamping therapist and getting a script.

I finally told him I was done dealing with him, and that it was the most idiotic thing I'd ever heard of and that he'd regret it. He ended up sheepishly contacting me a couple months later and admitting he'd changed his mind.

I'm actually not the only trans person he talked to; he was also talking about it with a few of my trans friends, and we all agreed he was fooling himself and it was a horrible idea.

Quotea trans clinic with a useless rubber-stamping therapist and getting a script.

Unfortunately, I only know of two kinds of psychologists. Those who tell me to get lost in a polite way and constantly invent nonsensical excuses one by one. She actually said that seeing someone who was more of a specialist than her would result in "biased results". And those who don't really care about doing their jobs properly.

I have noticed that some of the rubber-stamping therapists are extremely, extremely shady.
Claiming to be part of associations which they are not, lacking qualifications, etc.
Unlike many people who use them, I took the time to investigate their backgrounds.

And you know? With one trans clinic, they didn't seem to have a psychologist at all.
Just a doctor and the site described how you'll have a discussion with the doctor about the steps of your transition. They'll just send you off to grab the pills.

My psychologist basically specialises in PTSD and other things, so everything she comes up with is related to PTSD, etc. and has an extreme case of what you call it... Tunnel vision? She doesn't really tell me why something isn't possible, just possible solutions and mainly dodging the question. This is how it is and that is all. And she's a big trigger of dysphoria. She can really push my buttons. But I can't react, otherwise it'll create more problems.

Actually, she has come up with one reason why it wasn't possible, but I fired off a rebuttal as to why it was nonsensical and she changed her tone to... I have analysed the information which you have provided me, while generally avoiding actually explaining.

It feels like talking to the police. They take in evidence and testimonies and then the court brings down it's verdict.
And she charges $300 per session. Gah, she's infuriating, but some geniuses chose her.

Quote from: Xirafel on November 07, 2016, 12:09:09 AM
Unfortunately, I only know of two kinds of psychologists. Those who tell me to get lost in a polite way and constantly invent nonsensical excuses one by one. She actually said that seeing someone who was more of a specialist than her would result in "biased results". And those who don't really care about doing their jobs properly.

I have noticed that some of the rubber-stamping therapists are extremely, extremely shady.
Claiming to be part of associations which they are not, lacking qualifications, etc.
Unlike many people who use them, I took the time to investigate their backgrounds.

And you know? With one trans clinic, they didn't seem to have a psychologist at all.
Just a doctor and the site described how you'll have a discussion with the doctor about the steps of your transition. They'll just send you off to grab the pills.

My psychologist basically specialises in PTSD and other things, so everything she comes up with is related to PTSD, etc. and has an extreme case of what you call it... Tunnel vision? She doesn't really tell me why something isn't possible, just possible solutions and mainly dodging the question. This is how it is and that is all. And she's a big trigger of dysphoria. She can really push my buttons. But I can't react, otherwise it'll create more problems.

Actually, she has come up with one reason why it wasn't possible, but I fired off a rebuttal as to why it was nonsensical and she changed her tone to... I have analysed the information which you have provided me, while generally avoiding actually explaining.

It feels like talking to the police. They take in evidence and testimonies and then the court brings down it's verdict.
And she charges $300 per session. Gah, she's infuriating, but some geniuses chose her.

Yeah some shrinks can be frustrating.

I'm not necessarily opposed to informed consent, but I also think a therapist should do their job if someone goes to them. All of us finally talked him into seeing a therapist, and when he finally went it was clear the therapist was just a head nodding enabler. Ugh.

I have a weird story, which may or may not resonate with the people in this particular group.
I have been bigender all my life, with separate personalities on each side of my brain (studies indicate male traits tend to be on the right hemisphere, and female traits on the left) but didn't realize it.
I'm also dyslexic, which is typically a male problem, but which I acquired through having male traits.

I couldn't remember what one brain hemisphere gender side did when in the other brain mode. Objects I put down would disappear and reappear in other rooms. People were always yelling at me that they had told me something that morning, but I would argue angrily they hadn't, since I didn't remember it. I decided my family was nuts and tried to play along with them.

At 61 years old, after I'd been living in Thailand a few years, I realized I'm partially transmale, despite only testing at having 61% male identity. My separate male and female personalities had different likes and dislikes, tastes in movies and books, etc.
When I was in female mode, I thought my male side was my imagination, and when in my male mode, I thought my female side didn't exist.

Finally I began taking a common Thai herb, derris scandens, for back pain after an injury.

The herb caused the brain hemispheres to reconnect..suddenly, dyslexia vanished. I could remember numbers when typing, keep track of multiple open webpages.

This time, when an object disappeared, I'd remember what happened. I was the one who moved it!

I also found that my two gender sides blended. Each mode could remember what happened with the other gender mode, and I felt like a whole person. I am aware now that I am both male and female and I'm at peace with myself.

Thats pretty intresiting up above me.... im 22 and although i hate masculine trait i have grown up with (and are still kinda with me even tho they bring dysporia) i could not imagine life for another 39 years trying to sort this out. Is that Herb available in Canada you know? all i know is to live happily in the life i want i am either a super FEMboi or indeed a transwoman. When i embrace my girl side life is amazing, fufilling and worth living. Yet this is still lkinda new as i never allowed myself t explore this side for a massive amount of my life, only 2 years ago did i actually allow myself to so i still have to deal with doubts, the whole ''is this a phase for me''. When i go out full masculine manly man i hate it, sometimes i think maybe with a little effort i can make it work... only to burn out, have dysporia and need to switch to a more feminine person. Still, i dont hate the male body itself if its femed up (facial hair gone, hrt to help feminize and keep my little thingy from moving around),though when i dont have the ''wtf am i doing'' moments i would rather be a full female! i know i am an odd one....

Quote from: CarlyMcx on November 01, 2016, 01:04:20 PM
Raell, people cannot suddenly be trans, but they can be transgender and so deeply closeted as to be in denial about it all their life, and they can suddenly start to put aside the denial.

Asides from brain changes, this pretty much hits the nail. Extreme sexuality changes also can be affected by drastic brain changes as well. There's no evidence gender or sexuality is any more immune than other aspect of a person to brain changes.

And yes, there are cis-people who thought they were trans. In fact, I was one of them at age 4 or something.

Vervain, to my understanding, US people are considered trans if they experience gender dysphoria. However in Thailand nobody "comes out" or goes to therapy..Buddhist people simply dress and live as it suits their gender identities.

I teach ESL in southern Thailand, and if I divide a class into girls vs boys for a vocabulary  contest,  the students will casually inform me if a boy or girl identifies as the opposite gender, and I simply count their points for that team and refer to them as their preferred gender, no matter how they are dressed.

At least two female-bodied teachers in schools where I taught were fully transmale and lived/dressed/used pronouns as males, and were treated as males, or "Toms."
No testosterone or therapy.

In my case, I have about 40% female identity, so I could be called non-binary, with male leanings. I don't take hormones, and dress androgynously, with somewhat female-ish clothing for work, but I make my own clothes. Still, I take derris scandens, common Thai herb used for back pain, because it blends my male and female sides and allows me to live at peace with my gender mix.

Here's an article about something similar to what you're talking about (if not exactly what you may be referring to):

Is Dysphoria Necessary for Being Trans? The "Truscum" Debate

For those who don't trust links, copy/paste this address: https://transphilosopher.com/2016/11/07/is-dysphoria-necessary-for-being-trans-the-truscum-debate/

Siobham

Yes, exactly. I posted that article to my Twitter feed which streams to Facebook.  My Facebook friends are mostly, or pretend to be, hetero, conventional religious folks from my past as an M.K. (missionary kid), growing up in the West Indies.

These past few election term issues, generating racial, trans, homo,religious phobia hate memes, have thinned my Facebook friends list considerably. But although the rest might think that way privately, they only post cheerful memes.

Quote from: ErinS on November 06, 2016, 01:25:37 PM
I've met at least one. A young man with '->-bleeped-<-' tendencies I'm socially acquainted with told me he wanted to transition, except he never could describe it in anything other that wasn't clearly a sexual fantasy. I kept trying to get him to do more thinking and he just got really angry, and he ended up actually going to a trans clinic with a useless rubber-stamping therapist and getting a script.

I finally told him I was done dealing with him, and that it was the most idiotic thing I'd ever heard of and that he'd regret it. He ended up sheepishly contacting me a couple months later and admitting he'd changed his mind.

I'm actually not the only trans person he talked to; he was also talking about it with a few of my trans friends, and we all agreed he was fooling himself and it was a horrible idea.

My opinion on the matter is simple. People are responsible for their own actions. The only reason it's a big deal is because morons go out, do that and then they scream that the government is incompetent for letting them do what they want to do.

The government can't protect people from themselves, and they shouldn't need to.
And this is why my government has a requirement of like a year of therapy and a year of presenting as female just to get the treatment to begin with. Because people kick and scream over decisions they made themselves.
You would probably need the therapy just to get over the humiliation of having people sneering and mocking.

I would imagine that it would involve walking around in a dress all the time while appearing unambiguously male with a face caked with make-up to make it look "feminine" enough, otherwise people might mistake it for a new fashion trend x.x
People are old enough to make their own decisions. Unless, you're like eight, I don't see any plausible way to "present female" without anyone noticing that something's up.

And don't anti-androgens kill off sexual activity? Just put them on that for a few months and see how quickly their sexual fantasies fade away when they have no sex drive.

There was someone in the UK papers  few years ago who changed & de transitioned. Can't remember much else except they were buying a football club & it seemed like someone with more money than sense.The story came across as someone who wouldn't take responsibility for their own actions & was looking to blame someone for making them transition as do 99% of similar stories

Quote from: Xirafel on November 21, 2016, 06:57:16 PMAnd don't anti-androgens kill off sexual activity? Just put them on that for a few months and see how quickly their sexual fantasies fade away when they have no sex drive.

AA does kill drive from T; but T isn't the only source of sex drive.   E2 is just as potent.   Get it up into Fem normal range mid-cycle; and I'm actually completely functional, in some ways my function is improved in that respect.    I'm not sure if that is common to all humans, or just folks that got our peculiar hormonal exposure during fetal development though..

Quote from: KathyLauren on October 31, 2016, 01:55:57 PM
I always thought the definition of cisgender was a person who didn't question their gender.  If you question it, you are somewhere on the trans spectrum.

  this is what i would think, but i have seen it posted exactly the same "some cis-gender people think..." i would think if they think they are something other than. they would not be cis-gender, but what do i know i have lived my life in the closet of fear LOL.

It sounds like you share a lot of experiences with the trans experience. Welcome. Also, I've seen PCOS described as an intersex condition so you could also reach out to that community. Many of them were also forced to take on certain gender roles as children. There's a film called Intersexion that you might like.