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I explained my motivation for transition today, figured I'd share here.

Started by EyesOpen, November 21, 2016, 06:19:27 PM

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Lilaclucy101

Whoa this is really well thought out. Reading this has given me some courage in coming out to the rest of the family, with a rough idea in how I should explain my need and desire too be who I am. Thanks for sharing  :)
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aaajjj55

EyesOpen - I endorse the other posts on this thread - you have articulated this beautifully.  Thank you also for the link to Anne Vitale's site which is a mine of useful information.

With best wishes for your journey,

Amanda
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billyjeans

Quote from: EyesOpen on November 24, 2016, 12:34:08 PM
Thanks :) I'm glad it helped. You certainly aren't alone in dealing with the self-loathing, I think most of us experience this quite strongly when we first confront our authentic selves.

Take some time to read through Anne Vitale's essays. I found them invaluable in overcoming these feelings. She's worked with a lot of trans individuals over the years and has loads of valuable, knowledgeable insights. The developmental review essay I linked earlier is an absolute must-read, especially for struggling MtFs. You may find some comfort from reading this one as well:

http://www.avitale.com/GuiltShame.htm

There are loads more of these writings on her main site under the "Essays" and "T Notes" links. I hope you find some peace of mind with your situation. It's tough at first, but as you begin to accept yourself and view your identity with some sense of normalcy, the feelings of shame and embarrassment will lessen dramatically. It truly does get better <3
I'm so happy that you posted this because it sums up exactly my experience in life. Wow!


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Another Nikki

Wow!  It's amazing to read someone else describe much of my life.  Very well written and very level headed.  And i agree about Dr. Vitale's essays.  They really helped my wife come to terms with what I was going through.
"What you know, you can't explain, but you feel it. You've felt it your entire life—that there is something wrong. You don't know what it is, but it's there like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad. It is this feeling that has brought you to me."
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DawnOday

Quote from: EyesOpen on November 22, 2016, 10:47:29 AM
It was eye opening to realize how common this experience is in our community. It helps so much to know that we're not alone and that these horrible experiences can be overcome <3

BTW, have you read Anne Vitale's developmental review essay? It really helped me understand the factors that brought me to this point:

http://www.avitale.com/developmentalreview.htm

The G3 life ain't easy...

A belated thank you for referring this article. It's another piece in the puzzle.   
Dawn Oday

It just feels right   :icon_hug: :icon_hug: :icon_kiss: :icon_kiss: :icon_kiss:

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First indication I was different- 1956 kindergarten
First crossdress - Asked mother to dress me in sisters costumes  Age 7
First revelation - 1982 to my present wife
First time telling the truth in therapy June 15, 2016
Start HRT Aug 2016
First public appearance 5/15/17



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Dan

What an awesome post, and so many of us ( no matter whether Mtf or FtM) can relate to your story.

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