I've been exploring the possibility that I might be a transgendered woman, I wouldn't say I've got much if any physical dysphoria, but socially I know I would be more comfortable being treated as a woman. I'm 32, overweight from depression eating and lethargy, rapidly losing weight now that I've been exploring this for a while (a healthy rate, less than 1% body weight per week, but close to that), I've told only my closest female friend and now a bunch of internet strangers. What I'm looking for is basically confirmation before making a therapist appointment.
I've never fully dressed, but honestly want to, I know I'd look terrible until I get rid of more of this male belly fat though. Been growing my hair out, and doing lower body exercises to feminize my figure as much as I can without permanent changes, it's to the point now that some people believe I'm already transitioning, basically said joking/teasing, but I know it's rooted in truth.  Basically what leads me here is, to get to the root of my depression I've been exploring my true nature, turning off mental filters, breaking walls, and I'm finding that's making my behavior and other choices more feminine, I used to police myself all the time, find that I'm sitting or standing in a feminine posture and change it immediately, the less I do this though the happier I am. As I said I don't really have much physical dysphoria, but nor am I attached to having male secondary sex traits. I think I WOULD be attached to my secondary traits if they were the female type. Could that be a form of Mild dysphoria maybe? I'm straight, but would probably be bi as a female, mostly due to being treated differently and feeling differently about myself. Since it's helping me lose weight, improving my mood and hygiene, it could only be a positive thing to hang on to for now, I've told myself I won't physically transition until I meet my weight goals because it's harder to lose weight on E or so I've heard.

I'd be interested in hearing from folks who use implanted pellets, and also if there is an antiandrogen that doesn't need to be taken daily

It sounds like you are already driving your transition forward, via diet and exercise, some excellent starts that will serve you well in life no matter what path you take.

You'll find that most folks never, ever question their gender identity.  Those that do question, are very likely transgender persons.  Being transgender is a pretty broad umbrella encompassing folks that just under-dress, cross-dressers, all that way to folks seeking a full medical transition.  Your orientation, straight or bi, is actually independent of your gender identity.  We often speak of the two as who you go to bed with, vs who you go to bed as!

It sounds like you have lots of questions you want to engage in.  You might want to expand on your background in a post in the Introductions area as well.

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Quote from: Daniellekai on February 16, 2017, 01:22:20 PMWhat I'm looking for is basically confirmation before making a therapist appointment.

Hi, Danielle.
"Confirmation" is perhaps too strong a word for what we could offer after one post.  But it sure sounds like you could be trans, enough that a visit with a gender therapist would be a very good idea.

Maybe confirmation is the wrong word, more of "a push" it's tough to take more concrete steps, lol

Hi!

What you're describing sounds pretty close to my experience, except I'm experimenting with a couple different things from you (losing weight to get as close to a good, female target weight as possible; wearing makeup; shaving my legs, stomach, chest, and armpits). And I'm finding more comfortable with myself, too, the more I integrate (even while I'm mentally abusing myself through depression). All I can say is you go, girl! Excited to hear more of your journey!

xoxo
Renée

I had a similar experience and I'm transitioning at the same age.

I do E injections every two weeks, it is cheap and takes like 60 seconds, it's really not a big deal. I would not recommend pellets until you are post op for GRS or orchi because you can't get surgery with estrogen in your system.

After the first year or so you may be able to stop anti androgens, the estrogen may naturally suppress T sufficiently and if not you can consider orchi.

Get to a therapist, it sounds like you are trans but the timing of a transition is up to you.