Quote from: GrayKat on February 20, 2017, 10:34:24 PM
Hello, I'm new 
Hi Gray, welcome.
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It's something I have suffered with since I first became fully aware of myself in first grade and was not welcome among the girls. And since I found boy's behavior distasteful, I spend my early years wandering alone. Well, I still do.
This sounds like me. When I was 5, I wanted to have my hair long, like the "other girls." My father was strict and wanted boys to have short boy haircuts. Every time he called me to cut my hair, I'd run under the bed, cry, and scream. He'd have to drag me out, beat me, and tie me to a chair.
It get's lonely. Not a physical loneliness per se. More of a psychological loneliness. It dawns on you; or maybe it's just me; that no matter how many friends you have, and how many people in your family you have: they will never know the real you inside, never love you as you want or need to be loved. You end up feeling invisible, like nobody knows you exist.
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I have been in therapy for six months, long enough to understand that there is no pill, no mental affirmations, or self induced delusions that relives dysphoria.
Has the therapy helped you? If there was a pill to make it go away, I'd take it