^ that's what I did as well.  Went to a website of the most popular names from my birth year and went down the list until something resonated with me...tried a few others for a couple days and I knew they weren't right pretty quickly. 

After deciding I thought it was kind of interesting that "Staci" means "resurrection" ...seems fitting

so I just feminised my male names for when I change so its Davina Martina. Keeps the initials the same and if I get called dave then its just a shortened Davina.

Changing one's name is a funny thing. My older brother and my older sister didn't like their given names. (In all fairness, my brother's name was terribly antiquated and subjected him to huge amounts of painful teasing. He was named after our father and grandfather. Sigh.) So, in their teens and twenties they went by alternate names. I have a grand-niece who is named after my sister's alternate name in honor of her. But, after they lived with them for a while, they decided to revert back to their given names.

I, on the other hand, had a more common name that didn't deflect the teasing and insults, but I wasn't as bad with it as it was reasonably common. I never really considered changing it. (But I didn't continue it with my kids.  )

I've been a writer and giving names to characters (and even writing under pseudonyms) is normal (for me).

So, when I was looking for my feminine name, I thought along the lines of many who have already commented. I thought I would go with a feminine form of my given name. I even looked up all the variants (and there are a LOT of them in the US and Europe). I picked one that seemed best. I used it for a while in my private journals, etc. But, somehow it never felt right.

The more I acknowledged her, the less the name I had picked seemed right. Then, when trying to figure out a handle for her to use in a forum, my intuition clearly told me her name is Jackie. And she was right. It was exactly right. It resonated. And she was ready to be introduced by that name (in public or in private). It's almost like she extended her hand to me and said, "Hi. My name's Jackie."

And so it has been ever since.

Hugs,
Jackie

I go back and forth on this quite a bit to where it causes me a lot of stress.

I chose Veronica quite a while back because it was one of the few fairly common girl names that I happened to never really know someone who had it...I really didn't want an ex-girlfriend's name...

At this point in my transition, I'm mostly going by my birth initials, which are not VL, I could just continue to go with that, some cis-women go by their initials, though it's more common for guys to. If I did do that, I'd likely go with a female version of my birth name, middle name is going to have to be something else entirely...

...or I could just skip the whole name change thing entirely and really go with the initials thing...not totally loving it, but at least one cis-woman goes by my initials...so why can't I? Would make it much easier...Did I mention this name thing causes me a lot of stress?

Often I wish I had been born with a gender neutral name that I was comfortable with.  Who wants to go through the headache of a legal name change lol?  My birth name was very masculine with no feminine form.  I chose Tara because it was on the top 100 baby names of the year I was born and I liked it.  I wanted something that fit my age.

I LOVE the name "Alyssa."

I had originally thought of going with the feminized version of my first name, too, which I had figured to be "Brenda." Problem was, I wasn't too fond of that name in the long run. xD

So instead of go from a name distinctly male to a name that's female but I'm not happy with, I started thinking about new names. I immediately came up with "Renée." Mostly because my middle name starts with an R and I didn't like the feminine version of my middle name either, so I started thinking of names starting with R.

When I told my girlfriend about it, she thought it was really fitting, so I was set.

Quote from: ImSomething on March 07, 2017, 07:59:37 AMI immediately came up with "Renée."

Very appropriate.  In French, it means "reborn".

Another advantage of feminizing your original name is sound signature. When you aren't paying attention 100% and someone calls your name, it's the general sound, like a musical phrase, that catches your attention and turns your head. That obviously can change over time, like if you get used to a nickname that others call you consistently, but if you're half asleep or deep into a book or otherwise very preoccupied, you pick up your name more naturally if it's a sound that you're super used to.

My name does not masculinize and sound the same at all, it's kind of annoying. In fact, I'm leaning toward a new name that has very little in common with my birth name but sounds a lot more like it than anything else, i.e. vowel sounds and syllables. I have ADD and a lot of times it's only people calling my name that can snap my attention out of hyperfocus, so that may be why that particular aspect is important to me.

My name does not masculinize either. That's why my internet name is Tony. My second name could be Paul. Maybe I'll take Paul as first name. Then I don't need to change signature. My first birth name also starts with a "P".

So what are the cons of feminizing/masculinizing one's given name?

I don't entirely love the feminized versions of my birth name, at the same time, I was called these one by the kids at school trying to give me a hard time but I actually liked it, and could reclaim it, and another by a former coworker who was into comic books and got it before I got it...and thought it was awesome that I was a man during the day and could become a woman at night...like Peter Parker/Spiderman etc...I'm thinking about that version too...

Quote from: VeronicaLynn on March 07, 2017, 10:53:59 PM
So what are the cons of feminizing/masculinizing one's given name?

I don't entirely love the feminized versions of my birth name, at the same time, I was called these one by the kids at school trying to give me a hard time but I actually liked it, and could reclaim it, and another by a former coworker who was into comic books and got it before I got it...and thought it was awesome that I was a man during the day and could become a woman at night...like Peter Parker/Spiderman etc...I'm thinking about that version too...

In my opinion...

Pros:
- It gives everyone around you less to mess up and/or complain about if they can call you a similar name (or continue to use a neutral nickname derivative thereof).
- It's familiar to you and won't require an adjustment period. Names are similar to pronouns in that we become so used to being called by them that they become a part of us for better or worse. It takes time to get used to internally gendering oneself properly and consistently and it will take time to do so with a brand new name, as well.
- Chances are, the masculinized/feminized version of your current name will jive well with the time period in which you were born and won't make you stand out for the wrong reasons.

Cons:
- In some ways, it ties you to your old existence to be called by the same nickname tied to a masculinized/feminized version of your previous name.
- It can feel less like an actual 'change' took place and may be frustrating for a period if you're really grappling with the concept of wanting a clean slate.

Quote from: Minyassa on March 07, 2017, 01:25:14 PM
... When you aren't paying attention 100% and someone calls your name, it's the general sound, like a musical phrase, that catches your attention and turns your head. That obviously can change over time, like if you get used to a nickname that others call you consistently, but if you're half asleep or deep into a book or otherwise very preoccupied, you pick up your name more naturally if it's a sound that you're super used to.
...

I will say, from my experience, I don't miss a beat when someone calls my new name.  I have also stopped turning my head when I hear my previous name.  There are a few that have my previous name, and I used to instinctively respond with attention when I heard it.  Partly because I was not sure if I was being deadnamed, or just instinct.  Both have stopped.  I respond to my new name, not a feminized version of my deadname, instantly and every time.  ainsley is fairly unique in the middle of the USA, too, though.  That helps...and may be another thing to consider.

My name can't be feminized despite baby name books saying it can be a girls name too.  (then again they say Houston is an acceptable girls name...)  Thankfully I have never really liked it as I was "blessed" with three commonly used first names that all start with the same letter.  I understand that not much could be done about the family name, but what in the hell were my parents thinking?

I really like Estelle but I have always had a lisp that annoys the hell out of me so that's looking like it is out along with anything else with an S sound.  Having something simple like Amy (or Amelia so I can be simple or pretentious as I choose) would be nice.  There are other nice names like Colette, Katerina, and such but I would rather not come off as attention-whorey with the name choice.

I guess I've always taken names for granted.  Choosing one is definitely proving more difficult than I had anticipated.

Quote from: Stone Magnum on March 07, 2017, 11:45:23 PM
- It's familiar to you and won't require an adjustment period. Names are similar to pronouns in that we become so used to being called by them that they become a part of us for better or worse. It takes time to get used to internally gendering oneself properly and consistently and it will take time to do so with a brand new name, as well.

Oh gosh, I'm so relieved to find that I'm not weird because of how long it's taking me to get adjusted to it. I didn't know that was a normal thing and so I would sometimes panic, thinking "What if I'm not trans and I'm just weird?" because it was taking time to consistently correctly gender myself in my head, even though I'm much more comfortable with feminine pronouns.

Quote from: ImSomething on March 08, 2017, 01:47:42 PM
Oh gosh, I'm so relieved to find that I'm not weird because of how long it's taking me to get adjusted to it. I didn't know that was a normal thing and so I would sometimes panic, thinking "What if I'm not trans and I'm just weird?" because it was taking time to consistently correctly gender myself in my head, even though I'm much more comfortable with feminine pronouns.

You're definitely not alone, don't worry. It's just something to which we become conditioned.
For me personally, I had begrudgingly gotten as used to hearing 'she' and 'her' pre-T as possible as they're typically the pronouns that can't be avoided in conversations. However, I really hated it when someone would go out of their way to 'girl', 'lady', 'miss' (etc.) me.
Even still, it took a while for me to 100% stop using the 'she' stuff in my head.