I took a bus today and I heard this little. Kid ask her mother if that was a  boy. seeing. That I was the only transgender on the bus I'm guessing she meant me. Ive been feeling good latey about my appearance, this felt. Like a brick through my windshield

Kids will see right through you.. And they lack the social filters not to say anything. I wouldn't worry about it, it has little to do with how adults see you - in fact, the mother was probably confused by his question.

I'm sorry that happened, but I guess since kids see right through then that means I pass because I've had little boys who confronted me to tell me how pretty they thought I was.

Thai and other Asians seem able to instantly and casually assess the inner genders of people, no matter how they are presenting.

I am a bio female who is partly transmale, but always present as either somewhat female (at work) or androgynous/slightly feminine. Yet both Thai adults and students usually use the male pronoun for me, and if they know English, they tend to call me "Sir." I don't correct them.

My daughter says her US students do the same to her, except that she hasn't been sure if she should be insulted or not. She says she feels very gender ambiguous, but is more likely to dress femme than I am.

yes it has happened to me too even though I have been living and working as a woman 5 years now. Will that ever end??

I was having my eyebrows waxed and threaded the other day and this youngster shouted out "look that man's having what women have!" Bless her little cotton socks, I didn't really mind, but it was cringe worthy in such a public place. At least she was half right.

Here's the funny thing. Every time the "A child clocked me" topic comes up, we're as guilty of assigning gender based on appearance as anyone else. It's always "A little boy asked his mother..." or "This little girl pointed at me...." and we should know better. Here's how we should be saying it:

I was at the supermarket today, and this young child asked their parent if I was a boy or a girl.

Because we all want those gender expectations and stereotypes to disappear, right? 

Hugs, Devlyn

I don't want to be rude, but it's the opposite for me. It's like kids see pass my "physical appearance" for some reason, and see the inner person.

I wouldn't take it too personally though.... we're not cisgender women, and can't expect to pass a cisgender woman unless we did it before puberty or were very feminine to begin with, or a lot of money to fix every masculine flaw.

I quite enjoy the look of puzzlement on children's faces when they see me.  It's non judgemental,  but you can see them trying to figure me out. I think for them to experience variety can only be a good thing.

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Its the knot knowing  what them are.  thinking that drives me insane

It can be annoying for us, but bear in mind that a small child rarely questions out of animosity. (Older kids, a bit different as they have picked up on things from parent and playground.)  The human brain includes some 'hardwired' image classification networks in visual processing, basic face classification included.  I know that I can trigger conflicting signals in this primitive classification network, and the child can't quite tell if I am 'safe/female' or 'potential hostile/male'. (To oversimplify two possible responses from this network.)

I had thought about this and was ready for being questioned by a child. I've been approached twice by small children who were questioning.  I answer in a soft voice that "I'm a human being, just like you and your parent."  I get a little smile in response.  They've gotten an answer, and I had a pleasant interaction with them, and perhaps it will affect their behavior in the future.

Stephanie - we had lunch a year ago and even then I saw nothing but female.  I don't see how anyone would see any differently.

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Quote from: Denise on April 02, 2017, 12:50:55 PM
Stephanie - we had lunch a year ago and even then I saw nothing but female.  I don't see how anyone would see any differently.

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thanks

Getting clocked sucks to be sure if your intent is to blend into the world as your true gender.  It's easy to assume that you 'pass' after many months/years of not experiencing a clocking incident.  Then, one day, reality come crashing down when a child reads you like "trans" was written on your forehead.  Ugh!

There's a learning process involved at picking a trans woman out of the crowd.  I pass pretty well, but I've noticed that I still get read in places where other transgender people live.  People learn to recognize the telltale markers.  In Chicago, where I live part-time, it's a given that I'll be seen as trans by others, but in conservative Arizona where trans people are few and far between, I'm just another woman.  Trans visibility isn't a good thing if you want to live stealth.

Don't worry Hun, it probably will happen to all of us at some stage, you look amazing, I wouldn't worry about it

Quote from: Chloe Cloud on April 02, 2017, 07:47:50 PM
Don't worry Hun, it probably will happen to all of us at some stage, you look amazing, I wouldn't worry about it

thanks

Quote from: Clara Kay on April 02, 2017, 07:25:25 PM
Getting clocked sucks to be sure if your intent is to blend into the world as your true gender.  It's easy to assume that you 'pass' after many months/years of not experiencing a clocking incident.  Then, one day, reality come crashing down when a child reads you like "trans" was written on your forehead.  Ugh!

There's a learning process involved at picking a trans woman out of the crowd.  I pass pretty well, but I've noticed that I still get read in places where other transgender people live.  People learn to recognize the telltale markers.  In Chicago, where I live part-time, it's a given that I'll be seen as trans by others, but in conservative Arizona where trans people are few and far between, I'm just another woman.  Trans visibility isn't a good thing if you want to live stealth.

That's kind of why I want to live in the Netherlands.... at 5'6 I'll blend so seamlessly with women there. I also want to get tattooed and piercings, and that brazillian curly hair colour, green eye contacts, change my face, get Asian eyelids (surgery), tan my skin... and hocus-pocus I become a mixed Hawaain-Carribean-Latina woman.

All my life I have been stared at because of my size. I am usually the tallest person in the room. Brings to mind my son when he was about five and we went to one of our favorite Mexican restaurants. A little family run place. My son asked the lady who served us why she walked funny. Instead of getting mad she pulled up a chair and explained to him that she has a club foot and proceeded to show him. Instead of getting mad at our son, she realized he was just a curious child.

At least a six year old probably has no malintent or hatred behind the question.