Does sitting with your legs tight together apply when wearing slacks or jeans?

It's not lady like but some women sit with their legs spread. With pants you can sit with your legs separated a little and it's not a problem. Just don't sit with your legs wide open.

YES how one sits is very important for MY success at being perceived as ladylike. Now, before I respond with what I feel is truly helpful info for you based on my successful life experience and some super advice I got earlier in my transition...
I posted last year about 9 months ago, some of MY successful techniques for passing well with female-model looks and behavior -- but I got strongly attacked for my successful experiences and advice SO I left this site for about 9 months -- so this time let me give a TRIGGER WARNING -- TO ANSWER YOUR ORIGINAL POST WELL REQUIRES THE FRANK DISCUSSION OF SOME GENDER STEREOTYPES AND EXPECTATIONS ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE ACCEPT AS "ACCEPTABLE" FEMALE BEHAVIOR. If such discussion causes you discomfort, please stop reading here. So I have forewarned you.

""" Trigger warning -- Okay -- here is how I was trained and what I've had fantastic success with, with being perceived as a beautiful female model and seldom can others detect I am trans. If THIS is your goal also, my experiences shared here will likely help you a lot.  If this is not one of your goals, or if you feel that my advice relies too much of expectations and stereotypes, then please disregard it.

Here is my specific highly successful experience and advice:

1) You will NOT likely be perceived well as female unless you sit with your legs together or sit with your legs fully crossed. Why ? Because sitting with legs far apart, taking up lots of space, is usually perceived by most people as a strongly masculine behavior. You will likely be perceived as demure and feminine if you take up less physical space -- because women most often do exactly this -- try to take up as little physical space in public as practical -- watch most women in real life and you will see that this is correct.

2) Men usually sit with their legs far apart because they are masculine. We women -- cis (non-trans) and trans -- usually sit with our legs far apart only as an invitation for men to approach us for sex. If this is what you want at any given moment, then by all means go for it girl ! And I hope you enjoy the attention. But if you don't want men to perceive you as being approachable for sex and you look otherwise highly feminine, then don't sit with your legs spread apart. Period !

3) If you are a trans lady and don't look particularly stereotypically feminine otherwise, if you sit with your legs far apart you won't be perceived as a girl who is asking to be approached sexually. Rather, in this case you are more likely to simply be incorrectly perceived as a "man" and it will probably be much harder to "pass" as a woman.

4) I am pre-op, but medical HRT hormone treatments for years have shrunk my unwanted genitals to a rather small size -- so that I am physically able to cross my legs tightly without physical discomfort nearly to the degree of any post-op trans lady or nearly to the degree and tightness of legs together of any cis (non-trans) lady. This helps me, and it might end up helping you, too. Although, if you cannot do this, don't overly worry about it. I've known several feminine-looking trans ladies in person in my life who CANNOT cross their legs -- either due to lack of physical agility to do so and/or because it physically hurts their unwanted genitals to do so -- and still look fab fem just the same. They simply always sit with their legs closed rather than crossed. Works just as well if this is necessary in your case to accomplish this, if this is your goal.

This precise advice was given to me years ago by both cis female friends and trans female friends, and wow-oh-wow has this advice served me well especially recently !!! Good luck in being as feminine as you want to appear and being perceived as feminine to the degree this is your goal and desire and your feelings. Jennifer xx

Study women when they sit.

They always naturally make themselves very small.  Legs together or crossed, arms in at their sides, hands folded in their laps or resting on their thighs. Backs straight, shoulders relaxed, good posture and ladylike and using as little space as possible. You can watch it on tv shows, at the mall, in doctors offices, outside on park benches, at sporting events and restaurants.


Men by contrast slouch, shoulders tense and rigid, legs spread, arms dangling down at their sides and taking up as much space as they possibly can.


If you want to be the part you have to become a STUDENT of what you wish to emulate.

Study how they walk, how they talk and enunciate words when they speak, their body language when they talk, how they use their hands, how they sit, how they lay down, how they lounge, when they do these things, what scenarios and circumstances they do them. 

Video record it if you can get away with it and not appear to be a creeper, then watch it, practice it repeat it, perfect it and implement it.

Quote from: JeanetteLW on April 10, 2017, 01:59:27 PM
  I also have to work at sitting ladylike with the odd inner muscle feel. Crossing my legs like a lady does is also a problem. I'm wondering if it gets easier if the male bits are removed....

  Hugs,
   Jeanette

Yes it does get easier once its gone. However as I just found out recently, dont cross them too soon after surgery. I irritated a suture and now am on bed rest till Friday (a whole week!) until the swelling and irritation recedes.

get your knees together and when sitting down move both your legs to the same direction, that way you'll look feminine and your legs will be together, I suppose you just need practice, for example, I can't for the life of me sit with my legs open, usually I cross my legs very tight, in High school my friends used to make fun of me, they used to tell me if they didn't hurt, If I had nothing there or how was I able to sit like that, just a bunch of nonsense.

I guess you feel the same way sitting with your legs closed as I feel sitting with my legs open, regardless of that, don't beat yourself that much, as long as you're not using a skirt there's no problem.

Thank go it's not just me who struggles with this!

I also struggle with crossing my legs. I think it's because my legs are short (30") but when I cross my legs as a guy, the leg that does the crossing is practically horizontal and it's just above my ankle where it meets the standing leg's knee. When I try and cross my legs like a woman, where the crossed leg is parallel to the other. I don't have enough length in my thigh to clear the resting leg fully and so even my best attempt leaves my crossed leg pointing at a 45 degree angle.This also means the crossed leg is elevated somewhat and not flat. I can achieve a flatter result if I cross the leg over the kneecap of my standing leg but that it painful as it's the soft underside of the knee on my crossed leg that's resting on the bony knee of the other leg.

Quote from: Alanna1990 on April 14, 2017, 02:03:36 AM
I suppose you just need practice, for example, I can't for the life of me sit with my legs open, usually I cross my legs very tight,
I guess you feel the same way sitting with your legs closed as I feel sitting with my legs open, regardless of that, don't beat yourself that much,

Same here. For me it has always been natural to cross my legs, hands on top and back straight. My Junk which is what it is junk doesn't bother me all that much. I am small in bone size and stature at 5'8" and 138 lbs on average.

Stretching seems to be the answer. Get involved in yoga etc as you will find that after the course of time the tendons start to lengthen and the muscle stretches. Practice posture, hand placement and legs together or crossed Repetition will help train the body and it will just end up being natural for you.

Huggs Niki Marie