Krystina52,
I do not want to be too critical but you asked for honesty.
Consider doing what I needed to do, lose weight. I was much heavier than you and losing the weight was the second most difficult thing to do. The most difficult thing was admitting to myself that I am transgender.
Susans Place has sections on weight loss, diet and exercise. The advise you find there is safe and effective. I used those areas to great effect and to date, I have lost just a few pounds over 100. I need to lose a few more pounds to make myself happier with my appearance.
I will say that there is nothing that makes me feel more feminine than having a skinny waist, smaller than my chest and hips.