Quote from: Peep on May 31, 2017, 12:48:30 PM
I was raised fairly gender neutral with very 'boyish' cis (afaik) female friends and a lot of brothers (read: a tiny dirty kid with really long matted hair climbing hills in a skirt pretending to be Robin Hood ) so it wasn't until i was a teen & facing spending the rest of my life as an adult ~female that i really realised

i imagine it would have been different had i not been very ambivalent about clothing in general (when i was 7/8 no clothing was the best choice lol) and if i'd had different parents or friends

My early childhood memories are quite pleasant because my family very much let me be a tiny dirty child who played with other tiny dirty children whose gender was not of any great importance...

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Quote from: arice on June 02, 2017, 08:47:58 AM
My early childhood memories are quite pleasant because my family very much let me be a tiny dirty child who played with other tiny dirty children whose gender was not of any great importance...

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yeah i think with the way that society is progressing the idea of knowing early because of gender roles is going to be increasingly variable depending on how old you are and where you live

Around 6-7 but I'll go 7-12 because "knowing" has been an ongoing process until about 4 or 5 years ago and early on I'm not sure I can separate the earliest dysphoria from other issues.

But the worst of it was early teens for sure. And then again during puberty which only reinforced my disgust.

From the age of three I went around telling people that I was a boy and getting mad when they insisted I was a girl.
I'm going to go with 7-12 though, because only when puberty started and genders became more segregated did I truly have an issue with feeling different. As far as I'm aware, I knew I was a boy, but I didn't view it as something being wrong.
I don't remember much from 6 and under, because of some stuff that happened around those ages that caused me to lack some memory. But as far as I've been told and from what I remember, my insecurity and frustration with my body only truly started when everyone else's started changing, too. 

The first time I remember being punished for wrong gendered behavior was about six - writing about myself as a he instead of a she. I knew that I clearly would have prefered to be a boy by second grade - roughly seven or eight. I came from a southern baptist family, and this was pre-Internet, so I had no access to anything that could possibly have given me the vocabulary needed to understand my experience until I went away to college. I hammer it into friends and colleagues all the time that just having the words to describe how one experiences the world can alleviate so much suffering.

When I was about 8 or so, I remember two of my brothers running naked around the house  before their bathtime, and my being angry because they had "things" and I didn't.  I distinctly remember yelling at my Mom, "where's mine?!"

As a teen, I "out-boyed the boys" in my neighborhood.  I was the fastest runner, the quickest at climbing trees, the one that was the best at fixing popped bike chains and the best at kickball.  To my family I was "a tomboy," which was the term used back then.

For decades, I dressed mostly androgynously.  Jeans, graphic t-shirts and tennis shoes were and still are, my clothes of choice.  Whenever my family had fancy get togethers like weddings, they'd beg me to wear dresses, which I did reluctantly.  I hated it.

I was at an anime convention three years ago and in the women's room talking with other cosplayers when I first heard the term "transgender" during a discussion about binding.  It was like a lightbulb went on in my brain!  I was like, "so THAT'S what I'm called!"

Three years later, and I'm 7 months into transitioning into the man I should be.  Its been a confusing, happy, frustrating, thrilling journey so far, and I wouldn't change a second of it.

Ryuichi

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I was happily a boy until puberty hit. 

I didn't realize I was trans until I was 18. I was playing an online game with a male avatar and people addressed me with a male name and pronouns. After a week or so I "admitted" to my in-game friends I was a girl, but that I wanted to continue to role play as a guy. When they didn't cooperate and made fun of me (enter slurs and other transphobic harassments), I broke down and realized it mattered a lot more to me than I thought it did.

I waited six months before I went to a sex therapist to address it further, but during that time there wasn't a fraction of a second where I doubted I was trans. It put a lot of things in perspective for me: I had a big aversion to 'girly' things as a child, I mistook dysphoria in my teenage years for a lack of self-esteem and I was diagnosed with inexplicable chronic depression.

A part of me is still, in some way, thankful to those in-game "friends" for responding as transphobically as they did. I don't know how long it would've taken me to realize it otherwise.

Kind of confused about this one, to be honest. First of all I'm still not sure if I'm 'completely' a guy, but I know I have a stronger connection to masculinity, hence the demiguy label for myself (right now).

Anyway, I picked 7-13 because that's when I first became consciously aware of it. I was about 10, 11, when I started thinking it through and realised I did not at all 'feel' like a girl. It wasn't just a casual passing thought, either; it was one I had fairly often. I also strongly remember when my boobs started to grow and I'd literally just push them down because I absolutely didn't want them.

However I also remember being very attracted to 'boy' things at a young age (even though I did like to play with dolls a lot too), and being mad I had to go for the 'pink girl' options when I'd much rather go for the tough, blue 'boy' options for presents etc. I've definitely tried to stand up to pee as a kid too (and failing horribly naturally).

Gotta admit, though, I never did MUCH thinking about it until my teens, but that's just not when I first became aware of something not being right consciously. It's just a question I don't have a very specific answer to, because it kind of happened in stages.

I answered "between 7 and 12 years."

Started noticing at age 6 or 7 when I got my first rather clear sign of dysphoria for not being allowed to be shirtless in public like the boys, and then again at age 10 when my tits started growing which freaked me out cause I wanted to stay flat so badly.

At 12 years old I had found out about the existence of transsexualism and randomly thought about that I "wanted a sex change" as I phrased it back then, even though I didn't think it was possible to be FtM at that age yet. That was back in 2001, btw, so it wasn't much to find out about trans people existing back then.

I was highly ambivalent about my puberty, cause I hated the changes of my body, but I wished to grow up and become an adult. Envied the boys' puberties.

I didn't actually know I'm trans, like for sure, until I was 15. It took a while to connect all those pieces and solve that puzzle. Then I went back into the closet again and didn't come out until I was 19.

So with that said, I hope I understood the poll question correctly.

I knew something was "wrong" when I was 19 or 20 and had a pregnancy scare. A few years later I learned that what I experienced was dysphoria. I never felt like anything, so I figured that's the way most people were. Didn't really understand that while I thought a lot about it and felt nothing about my assigned gender, cis people usually think nothing of it and feel a lot... or at least feel ambivalent.

Thought I was nonbinary from around 23ish to 26ish. Got a hysterectomy for medical reasons and tried to stop figuring out why I was so happy about it. Few more years went by and I stopped actively considering myself NB even though cis didn't fit either. Then last fall I realized I was a guy thanks to a text roleplay. The case was blown wide open again lol.

I've always been that tomboy kinda kid.  Like I have so many memories of my parents telling me to dress like a girl and buy less clothes from the mens/boys section.  I feel like they conditioned me into dressing and acting more like a girl.  I turned to makeup to make me feel more like a girl. 

Only when I discovered this community did I realise that I wasn't the only person to feel uncomfortable in my skin as a female and would prefer to be a male.  (I'm 17 so a little late on the train).  I haven't come out to people (excluding my counsellor and best friend) but I want to.  So yeah, I am a little late I guess when it comes to discovering that I am Trans.

*it also doesn't help that I attend an all girls school - and always have -*