I believe we love once - that there is that one person out there. Your one true love whom you're destined to be with.
And I got a raw deal because I found him and then lost him. I was widowed at 27. And if I sound bitter, it's because I am.

Now that certainly doesn't mean I'm living the remainder of my life celibate in any way, shape, or form. And I often imagine myself settling down to a fairly normal existence (something I never had) with a lady with kids. I mean, I could care for someone - but love?
I had many relationships before my husband, yet he is the only person I've ever loved.

So, Only One True Love - true or false?

Quoteyet he is the only person I've ever loved

If that is what you want to think than that is what is.

Nero -

I think that there is always the possibility of finding another true love.  Generally, I agree with you, but I think that it has to do more with the fairy tale of "happily ever after".  Increasingly, because of the stresses of modern life, that's becoming less and less likely.  Or, in your case, because of tragic circumstances beyond your control.

I truly believe that in cases like yours, one has to hold on to a hope that there's one more true love out there.  You know what - there are tons of single moms out there bouncing around, not particularly looking, but hoping that maybe some day they'll find a sensitive, loving man with whom they can share their life and their kids.  Maybe you're that man.     Don't give up!

Carol

Well it is possible to find another person who you could spend the rest of your life with, it is not easy to replace that first great love.


Sarah L.

Quote from: Nero on February 13, 2008, 06:39:04 AM
So, Only One True Love - true or false?

Heck, no.  I used to think that way, and it lead to a tremendous amount of anguish and suffering on my part.  You can't really know that any one person is your only one true love.  After a lifetime of falling deeply in love with a variety of people, each of whom I was sure were "the one," I came to realize that any of a large number of people could fit the "true love" label.  The fact is that any time you have to move on, your world does not have to come to an end.  Yes, I loved each one of them.  I still love each one of them, even the ones who are no longer in this world.  Those relationships will never end, but life still goes on, and there is the posibility of other loves in the future.

There are as many people to love as there is love to give.

I believe we can keep loving and falling in love. Sometimes I think love gets stronger over time as it has with me and my wife. To start from scratch it would burn bright and clean but without complexity or depth - it would probably pale in comparison to what I have now. Overtime I believe this could again deepen.

Quote from: Renate on February 13, 2008, 09:39:45 AM
Maybe for each of us there is only one time and one person for whom their loss
feels like having your stomach ripped out with the back of a claw hammer.

Renate

I've known that feeling several times.

I havnt a clue Nero... Id like to believe that there is someonoee else to love and to love me out there... but sometimes Im not so sure...  Part of me still feels dead and empty after Noe left...  *sigh*  I really really really hope there is a second chance out there and that Ill find that person and finaly feel some happyness again 

I hope you find that person too...

I'm fortunate to have true love now, and to have experienced it a few times in the past. I still feel love for previous partners with whom things didn't work out. I do know the feeling though of not ever knowing if it will happen again.

Z

In my experience, "true love" doesn't sweep you away. It plants you firmly on earth and connects you completely with reality and the person you love. And yes, once you experience it, it will never completely leave you.
Anyone can sweep you away; I think it takes a very special and wonderful person to hold your heart forever.

So, do we love once?, I don't think so.  I believe that we can love many times but those are just stepping stones to finding our true love. 

tink

There are so many different ways to love that the answer to your question has to be, no love does not only come once. Do you honestly think that the widow or widower who has moved on with their lives does not fall in love with the new husband or wife? Of course they are in love! That does not mean they don't hold the deceased partner dear to their heart.

I do not believe that it's only once;  also I don't believe that there is only one person in the world for you. Wishing you love and happiness!

I have found love more than once.  My latest "fling" has lasted 16 years so far.  Each time has been very different with all kinds of different feelings.  I just go with the flow.

Cindi

False. I do believe in soul-mates, but not just one.

Love - that's a deep subject.

For me - people come into your lives at certain points in time.  At that point in time you need them and they need you, and yes you do love them for that time.  And as time moves on so do our needs and wants.  There is no doubt that there will always be that one person on this trip of life that means more to us than all the rest.  The goal I guess is to treasure the ones that pass our paths and hold onto them for as long as we can.  When it is time to move on, either them of yourself, then just make sure the time that you had together was everything you wanted it to be and that it helped you through that particular time in your life, and theirs.

Sounds corny I know, but as I get older I realize that this is just a path that we are all on, friends, family, they all cross the path.  And I cross theirs

Gill

I keep falling in love with the same person over and over again.

Quote from: Gill on February 24, 2008, 10:03:21 AM
Love - that's a deep subject.

For me - people come into your lives at certain points in time.  At that point in time you need them and they need you, and yes you do love them for that time.  And as time moves on so do our needs and wants.  There is no doubt that there will always be that one person on this trip of life that means more to us than all the rest.  The goal I guess is to treasure the ones that pass our paths and hold onto them for as long as we can.  When it is time to move on, either them of yourself, then just make sure the time that you had together was everything you wanted it to be and that it helped you through that particular time in your life, and theirs.

Sounds corny I know, but as I get older I realize that this is just a path that we are all on, friends, family, they all cross the path.  And I cross theirs

Gill

   

tink

Quote from: Gill on February 24, 2008, 10:03:21 AM
Love - that's a deep subject.

For me - people come into your lives at certain points in time.  At that point in time you need them and they need you, and yes you do love them for that time.  And as time moves on so do our needs and wants.  There is no doubt that there will always be that one person on this trip of life that means more to us than all the rest.  The goal I guess is to treasure the ones that pass our paths and hold onto them for as long as we can.  When it is time to move on, either them of yourself, then just make sure the time that you had together was everything you wanted it to be and that it helped you through that particular time in your life, and theirs.

Sounds corny I know, but as I get older I realize that this is just a path that we are all on, friends, family, they all cross the path.  And I cross theirs

Gill

Brilliant!!

N~

Very definitely false.

Heck, you may often find yourself falling in and out of love with your so called true love.  But if there is a solid core of friendship beneath it all, things hold together.

Love, as portrayed by the media and many romantics, tends to be a binary thing.

Love, in reality, is a spectrum.

Love is an apple and I'm at the core.