So you can hear me roar.

Why am I a woman? You may as well ask why I looked like a girl in baby photos. You may as well ask why children I grew up with called me a girl, and treated me like one. You may as well ask why kids in high school thought I was on female hormones. Even if it had nothing to do with how I felt about myself, one cannot dismiss constant feedback during my entire life.

I wish I knew why in my head I am a girl.
Not because it keeps me awake at night, pure curiosity just.
I spent 26 years as a man, and my body always stayed pretty fine, small hands and feet for a guy, decent sized hips, it all makes me think it is even more than just in my mind.

It's how Mother Nature made me, I've always been one....it's just now I get to finally experience it ❤️

Michelle that's a beautiful statement - makes me smile.

Quote from: Kendra on July 01, 2017, 10:10:30 AM
Michelle that's a beautiful statement - makes me smile.

Makes me smile everyday Kendra, thank you 💕

Because I cannot be something I am not. Lord knows I tried for nearly 40 years. 

Maybe because some medication my mom had blocked androgen receptors at a critical time in neural and physical development.

Maybe because I might have one of the more than 400 known mutations to my AR gene.

Not because of an extra chromosome. That one I have had tested already.

Why doesn't matter.  It just is.  And it has nothing to do with makeup or clothes or shoes or any other extraneous thing we sometimes get hung up on.


Conform and be dull. —James Frank Dobie, The Voice of the Coyote

Because the alternative is literally and figuratively not pretty. Joking aside, it's a good question with a such a myriad of right answers. My first thought was: I just am. We just are. She just is.

It's better this way.
I'm happier.
I was born this way.
It feels right.

Because... yes!

lol

I really don't know. I was born this way... my psyche evolved this way. I am a woman because I am. Simple as that.

And going into genetic or hormonal factors... being a woman is far beyond than just the chromossomes you have.

As it was said, there are various syndromes that can lead to a femimine phenotype even in people born with XY chromossomes (androgenic insensitivity on the receptors, or Y chormossomes lacking a functional SRY portion). Besides that, hormones have a huge role on the development of male or female characteristics on all the stages of human development. A small hormonal unbalance on a key stage of the development and you may end a transgender individual.

Many of us probably have brains wired more on the female side of things. Hormones fault probably.

And going away of biological reasons... there are always the social aspect of being a woman. The gender roles, the gender constructs... Make-up and skirts are considered a female thing because our society made it that way...

It is a very complex question that still can't be easily answered.

And we can't answer it by saying that "I am a woman because I have a pair of X chromossomes". This is just the opposite of what the trans community is trying to seek. We all here are women, with or without the extra X chromossome.

It's the way my brain is hard-wired. I had no choice in it, just as I had no choice in the natural colour of my eyes or hair.

Quote from: Violets on July 02, 2017, 09:17:17 AM
It's the way my brain is hard-wired. I had no choice in it, just as I had no choice in the natural colour of my eyes or hair.

How I've always felt

Quote from: SophieD on July 02, 2017, 09:00:18 AM
"What is the answer to this question"?
One student simply submitted this response:  "If that is a question, this is the answer".

Very zen.

Bottom line, I don't know why I am a woman.  Perhaps because I can't stand being a man?

Thing is, I don't identify with so much of the "born this way" talk.  Maybe there was biological determinism to why I ended up where I did, but I didn't always know this.  When I was born, they dressed me as a boy, gave me boyish toys, and sent me outside to play with the other ones.  I believed my parents concerning my gender for the same reason I believed them about religion, how to tie my shoes and what time to go to bed. My capacity for skepticism and analysis was still many years in the offing.

I don't disbelieve at all those who say that they've always known.  I am a bit jealous of that certainty though.  I would say rather that I have always struggled.  Paraphrasing Jameson Green, coming out for me was less like coming out of a closet and more like lighting a series of candles in a dark place.

I only mention it, because when I was first looking for help, I ran into so much certainty that I figured my doubt-ridden existence must have been something else.  Well, it isn't.  I'm a trans as the next person...it just took awhile to figure it out in my case.

QuoteI don't disbelieve at all those who say that they've always known.  I am a bit jealous of that certainty though.  I would say rather that I have always struggled.  Paraphrasing Jameson Green, coming out for me was less like coming out of a closet and more like lighting a series of candles in a dark place.

I only mention it, because when I was first looking for help, I ran into so much certainty that I figured my doubt-ridden existence must have been something else.  Well, it isn't.  I'm a trans as the next person...it just took awhile to figure it out in my case.

I think its important for everyone to remember this. Some of us "know" early in life that we don't fit. Some go for years until they figure out the reason for what they feel. Sometimes it is just a process of putting the pieces together. Some have come to this forum questioning but saying they never felt like it before. Then as they begin to express their experiences from childhood, adolesence, and adulthood, it becomes clear we all have so much the same life experience as each other. Finding out later in life you are transgender in no way makes a person less valid.

In some ways I can feel some jealousy for those who were able to hold off the feeling of it for so long. For some it made their lives simpler not understanding. In the end nothing is simple about any of our lives. We must always remember to support all of our trans sisters and brothers. If we don't, no one will.

I didn't always know.  I had strong indications at age 6, 8, 11-teenage but then stopped. 

I had a winning lottery ticket in my hands for decades but didn't realize it until recently.

I think it's more a matter of respect though. As much as I agree that whole trans thing has gone abit mad.
I can't see why you would call someone who clearly lives and presents as a woman anything other than that.
Someone who has AIS normally will be raised as a woman, it would be absolutely horrible of me to consider her otherwise.
I mean we as mamamals, are all of the default to be female pretty much if there is no hormonal imput.
I dunno, I get some off what you are saying but at the same time for a perfectly passable trans girl or otherwise ther is no need to be stating medical facts. Unless it's a relationship situation it really is of no concern to anyone. Unless someone really has a problem, then those duds will get involved anyway just to be duds lol

Yea I totally agree, especially in the dating situation.
But for day to day life I see no reason to bring it up.
I pass as long as I don't open my mouth lol
As soon as I do they know anyway.
Anyway other than dating no one ever asks us, what are we woman or man
And if they have to ask then we are obvs doing something wrong lo
Haha no shade girl 😘

Dwarfs are humans, blind people, deaf people,  peple without limbs, thalidomide births, people with eczema. ..I could go on ad nauseum but these are people that are silently ostracised. They are not welcome in many social circles. Calling myself a woman and finding myself in an unwitting crowd that accepts me doesn't make me one of them, it simply means I fooled them. Those that are so ignorant they don't want to know or socialize with me can go to hell. I don't want to know their hateful ignorant asses anyway. I've put my transogyny to bed. How everyone deals with this thing is their prerogative.  I begrudge no one. But I'm also entitled to see myself as I wish. I don't have to nor do I want to be part of a "reality" that will never be accepted by the very group you choose to  mollify and educate.

We each get to decide.  I wasn't even slightly offended by Ⓥ's post but I can see where an XX/XY/XXY mechanical answer can trigger anxiety as we all deal with a world that hasn't caught up with us.  But hey, Ⓥ's account name is also concise and I think that is super cool (as are many of Ⓥ's posts).

This did get me thinkin.  I consider and call myself Japanese Welsh if asked in the right context.  I am half of each.  (If the person asking is a jerk, I reply "I'm human.")  Although I was born in California I never considered calling myself Japanese-Welsh-American... that's too complicated for my brain.  I could also choose to just say I'm a US citizen and that's the only thing people need to know.  We all get to decide what is best for ourselves, and that can be very private (stealth for example), or stated in a way that helps gradually chip away at society's bias.