Hi everyone 

I'm 17, and I leave home in a year's time. I'm currently registered at my local GP, with my family. My friend is trans and he recommends that I go ASAP to get on the waiting list for starting T, which I want to do. However, my parents are very transphobic; I have absolutely no idea how or when I will come out to them. I do know that coming out to them by them finding out that I have been to a GP about being trans behind their backs would be the worst possible way to do it.

So I'm wondering, could any under-18 UK trans people possibly help me out? Is it actually possible to go to my GP without there being any risk of my parents finding out (e.g. by the GP ringing my home phone to speak to me, letters arriving at my house etc.)? The GP I would go to has me listed along with my home address and home phone number, parents' mobile numbers etc. It's not that I think the GP would intentionally notify my parents, more the issue of them contacting me in a way which isn't private.

I am inclined to wait to register at a new GP when I leave home, but also, I don't want to waste too much time. 

Things could go badly or well no matter which choice you make.

A. If you email your parents to explain you're trans and how you have felt all your life, etc., they could:
    1. condemn, attack you, reject you, or even evict you.
    2. accept you, get used to the idea, then agree to allow you transition this year.

B.Keep quiet and live as your birth gender. This could cause depression, anxiety, and gives unwanted hormones a chance to change the body.

C. Go to the GP in secret. Your parents could:
     1. never notice, never ask questions
     2. find out and attack/reject/condemn you
     3. find out, but accept and forgive you.

Hi Harry and Welcome to Susan's

From what I hear about the NHS I think getting an appointment as soon as you can is important.

Talking to someone who knows what they are talking about is critical, this is your decision and yours only, so take your time and get expert help but always remember it is up to you.

Do explore the existing posts and feel free to ask questions.
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hey sweetie,
Im also from the UK and with my local GP they send a text message to confirm the appointment and then also a text as a reminder of the appointment. I would recommend changing your number but then the problem arises of your parents finding out why you did.

Not sure if you have to be 18 or 16 for it to be against the rules for your GP to tell your parents why you saw them. I'd ring the place and find out. Once you get on the waiting list it's a requirement of the GIC to have a blood test done and to check your weight and blood pressure; which will be carried out at the GP practice. Although some smaller practices don't do their own blood tests so it may need to be carried out at your local hospital. Which you may find hard explaining to your parents. Just letting you know so you can come up with a good excuse.

I don't see why you can't ask your practice to ring you up on your own number. And it's not right for parents to open up post addressed to you.

Hi Harry,

Welcome to the site.

I also wanted to let you know we have a spot on this site called Youth Talk. You might find some under 18 folks there with similar stories.

With warmth,

Jacqui