Hello everyone!

I'm still a cis guy(well, I have a male body) but I've always felt like I was not living in the right body...
It's kind of weird for me, because I feel somewhere between male and female, though I'd say I'm definitely more feminine.I don't know if It's possible for me to be more androgynous, but I know I would feel better as a woman. I was afraid of this side of me for too long, and I wanted to hide it, but I can't ignore it. So lately I took the decision^^ I took a rendez-vous with my doctor for next week, and I think I'll start the therapy I will finally become myself.

I'll let you all know how it goes^^ I'll probably stick here for a while, as this place already helped me a lot when I was looking for answers lately.

So I hope I'll make some wonderful contacts here, and I hope I'll soon talk to all of you as the one I really am.

Welcome hun!! You are defenitly among friends!

I am Ashley, pleased to meet you!

Hello KiranFox!  So glad you are here, and welcome to Susan's!

I am MTF and can definitely relate to what you described.  I am not full time yet, and in male mode I am quite androgynous these days.  We have members here who permanently aim to be androgynous or somewhere near the middle of the gender spectrum, and I have huge respect for that.  I believe it's most important to follow your heart, establish and live the life that is best for you. 

Congratulations on your decision to bring this up with your medical doctor.  I don't know if you have access to a therapist but many members have found that to be greatly beneficial.  I live near Seattle, and in the US I've found having a gender therapist is almost a necessity for dealing with insurance companies - but of course the main reason is for your personal well being and to help you make informed decisions.

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I'm sure I'll be seeing you around the neighborhood here - and greatly looking forward to that!  Best wishes on your next steps, including your first doctor's visit regarding an important stage in your future.

Kendra

Hi KiranFox 

Welcome to Susan's Place    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Hugs

V M

Thank you so much! And thanks, Kendra, for sharing this with me^^ it definitely makes me more confident about what's next.

You mentioned a very important thing, becoming more confident.  That wasn't easy for me.  As a male for several decades I heard people refer to me as shy, introverted.   I hated my own voice after puberty - maybe that's a reason I enjoyed playing violin as a way to express feelings without using my voice.  (I recently started MTF speech therapy).  I even hid much of this from myself and preferred to stay busy so I wouldn't have time to think about things. 

A month ago I flew to Vegas for a quick day trip as the gender I was destined to be all along - female - and was never clocked once.  I didn't notice a single odd glance and I heard nothing but "ma'am" all day.  This was before I started HRT.  I've had a ton of electrolysis and a bit of minor facial surgery but I believe the reason I blended in is I am more confident as a woman. 
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,225766.msg2000234.html#msg2000234

Physical changes can help, but being comfortable with yourself - no matter what gender or in between - is the most important. 

Hi,

  I'm Laurie, MtF and from what I read you are not cis. You are trans as far as I understand the term. The question is only of where in that spectrum you fit. Making up you mind to talk to a therapist and begin you search is about the wisest thing you could do. By doing so you admit to yourself you are different and by doing that you have begun a grand journey of discovery. You will become amazed at what you discover along the way. I know I have been. My journey is near the beginning to as I only realized I am trans last November and am now living full time as a woman. If you told me I would be doing that now last December when I started HRT, I would not have believed you. Yet here I am doing it 8 months later.
   I am an active member of Susan's Place and a self appointed unofficial greeter. As such (Hug) Welcome to Susan's Place! Come on in and become a part of the family here.  Do look around and relax. Peruse the topics and the links to information that has been given you. Make yourself at home.

Hugs,
   Laurie

Thanks to you for your warm welcome^^

Kendra thanks again! Yet I'm not fully confident but I'm working on it. Cause I know that soon I'll be myself^^
And Laurie thanks for your experience I'm sure this journey will be interesting!

Welcome!

It sure is an interesting experience. Nothing beats actually starting on hormones and suddenly one questions everything we have been socialised into being.  It's highly educational

Hey Kiran, welcome to Susan's.
This is a great place for help and support.
You didn't give us much info though, where are you based? What age are you?
The transition process can be tough but with a few good people on your side the world will be yours.
Again welcome and goodluck.
Hugs Rachel

Dan : I really can't wait to start the hrt^^ I'll start in less than a month. Maybe a week if I'm lucky

Rachel : you're right!
Well I live in Québec, Canada and I'm 17, turning 18 in a couple of weeks. I'm a programming student and a music composer^^

Music composer at 17 that's pretty cool.
You must speak French aswell then.
I speak some french too as I am half Swiss. From the French 3rd of the country lol

Thanks ^^ I'm composing since I'm 15, that's my passion.

And yeah, I do speak French, It's my first language.

What about you? Where are you from and what would best describe yourself? ^^

That's so cool, yeah French would be my second language.
I am from Ireland, and will be returning ther in December after 3 years living in Switzerland.
To describe myself? I would have to say a dud ha
No but seriously I'm pretty chill, a car freak really :')

Eh that's great^^

Do you have any advice you could give me about transition and HRT?
I took all the information I could before making my choice but I'm still a  bit scared about it even if I know It's the right thing to do

Well it's really nothing more than a case of trying get people that matter on yourside like your parents, gorwing tough skin, and believing 100% in yourself. If you don't own it people will walk all over you.
That's how it has been for me anyway.
Honestly for me the whole swapping hormones thing, I noticed no negatives, I just sat back relaxed and let things happen. Somethings are slower than others, and it's best not to be expecting things in particular
It's fun though :3

Awh, thanks! I know It's the right thing to do and I know I'll be happier as myself. I'll try to follow this advice and to be more confident with it. I'll try to mind myself because I know I'm doing the right thing ^^

And I really can't wait to engage on this wonderful journey. I can't wait to explore who I really am
So yeah, thank you again, I'm know I can do it!

Yeah, just try not stress over things and you will be fine.
We are all here for your worries

It's a very comforting thing to know. I'm very happy that this place exists^^ it has already helped so many people